Road Rules X-treme, Episode 9: The New Kina

Last time on Road Rules: Jodi moved in on Kina's fantasy boyfriend, and Kina was so not having it. So she used Jodi's poor performance in the helicopter dive challenge to suggest voting her off. Then Kina had a late change of heart, and they decided to go with picking names from a hat, as originally intended. The final shots of the episode consisted of the Roadies picking names, as solemnly and fearfully as if the prize for winning were getting stoned.

This week, the tension continues. One Jodi, one Derrick name drawn from the hat. Derrick chooses Kina. Patrick chooses Ibis. Kina takes the final name -- her own. She bursts into tears, and the Roadies make clumsy attempts to comfort her. But alas, no words can soothe that karma bite in your ass... it's too painful.

So Kina heads off into the night, while Jodi expresses guilt that she isn't going in her place. She says that Kina was the person closest to her, and she'll miss seeing her go. So will I -- as annoying as she could be, Kina had way more personality than any of the others, save Derrick. Once she has gone, Derrick mutters that he feels like puking, while Jodi agonizes for the thousandth time that she wishes it were her. Jodi, stop saying that, or you'll have the rest of your teammates wishing that as well.

Some of them already seem to -- Patrick states solemnly that if Jodi doesn't work on her communication and help them win the next mission, she's out the door.

Later that night, the Roadies receive a clue that states they are leaving Chile for Argentina. They crow in unison, thrilled to be getting a "change of pace," as Nick puts it. Does that mean the show will be called Road Rules X-treme: Argentina?

The road trip through the Argentine countryside reveals wide open skies, rugged mountains, and cows running across the plains... like Chile. If they hadn't said they were leaving, would we have known? Still, nothing can damper the Roadies' excitement. "Chile, it was nice to know you, but goodbye," says Patrick.

Now on to more worrisome business: the new teammate. Jodi and Ibis hope that she's nice, but fret that she will be bossy and tell them what to do. Unlike Kina, who... nevermind. They arrive at their campsite, and after long last a taxi pulls up. Patrick says that if she is half of what Kina is, the team will be all right. Whatever happened to "step up and prove yourself"? Or does that only apply to guys with comparable physical strength who could take over your territory?

The New Girl steps out of the taxi, looking reasonably attractive with short dark hair and almond eyes. Quickly we learn that her name is Angela, that she's 22, and that she lives in Los Angeles. She is worried about getting dirty because she's a girly-girl, and hopes that the girls with whom she'll be living are "down to earth." She thinks it would be cool to meet a guy who "doesn't want to get in my pants."

Signaling how unlikely that will be, Patrick and Derrick tear out of the R.V. to greet her. Drool all but glistens on Patrick's lips as he states that he is drawn to "pretty" people like Angela. Prove yourself, schmove yourself. Angela gives the group an X-treme key, and gets a grand tour of the R.V. She wonders where the bedrooms are, and the Roadies respond that what she sees is what there is. Don't believe them, Angela; behind a curtain lies a fully furnished four-bedroom house off of a citywalk.

Angela then tells them her life story -- lived outside Philadelphia, moved to Los Angeles a year and a half ago and, to the boys' disappointment, has a steady boyfriend. He's "the one," she pronounces emphatically, meaning she'll break up with him before the end of the season. Ibis marvels that Angela is in a different place in her life, with a "real job" as a wardrobe stylist and may have some trouble relating to kids in college. Angela shares these concerns, saying a bit smugly that she is used to talking about work and "more mature" subjects. Because working toward a higher degree is immature. The Roadies may have done plenty of childish things, but just the fact that they are in school does not put them on a lower level.

Angela tells the Roadies that she was home-schooled through junior high because her parents were Jehovah's Witnesses. She hated it, because she wasn't allowed to celebrate holidays and couldn't hang out with anyone not a Jehovah's Witness. To top it off, Angela was raped by someone in the church -- snuffing out any appeal it might have had once and for all. Now her family has no religion and her parents have split up. The Roadies listen with wide-eyed intrigue.