The Apprentice 2 Weekly Performance Review, Episode 10: Neither Putting Up Nor Shutting Up

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Mosaic Corporation:

Not much to say about your task - you had Sandy, after all. You SHOULD have won.

Andy: I really get irritated that Kelly and Maria overlook you. There's simply no reason for it, as you've proven yourself time and again. The only element I see you lacking is that people think you're TOO slick. You're trying too hard to prove yourself - you're either slick, or you're not. You're not slick, and you overcompensate. I think you would have more success by being straight with these people (reference the "Honda and Ferrari" bit) and use your eagerness and charm to your advantage.

I hope there is a switch next week, and you get to go to Apex. Maybe there you'll get the appreciation and respect you deserve.

Wes: I haven't been impressed with you yet, and that streak continues this week. You proved yourself to be completely irresponsible by driving like a maniac and - at least, not that we saw - caring one bit about the damage you caused. I'm sure the vehicle owners were taken care of, but that's my point. You knew someone else had the bill so you drove like you were playing Grand Theft Auto!

Sandy: Well, I've asked what you were good at, and I found out, didn't I? Credit where credit is due, you kicked major butt this week and were without a doubt the MVP of the task. I can't help but think they planned this task on a week when you weren't Project Manager. Either way, don't think I'm impressed. It's one thing to kick butt on a task in your bailiwick. It's another to do well when you're out of your element.

Maria: Your lucky streak just keeps going. It fails me why someone as sharp as Kelly would actually think you aren't a worthless idiot, but you've sure got him fooled. I mentioned that I'm not impressed with Sandy for being proficient in her area of expertise, so imagine how totally and completely ecstatic I am with someone who totally and utterly FAILS in the areas they claim to know about. In the QVC challenge, you said you were a good public speaker. You're not. You are a "marketing executive" by trade, but you're especially incompetent in anything having to do with marketing! You screwed up the brochures in the toothpaste ad, you tried to sex up the police department, and you screwed up what was a home run by leaving the phone number off the ad. And what's more, you lied about your screwups! TWICE!

So what exactly IS a "marketing executive" in Maria world? Are you the person that puts the flyers under the windshield wiper? Do you wear the chicken suit outside the Poultry Hut? You should consider yourself lucky if you can get THAT job after your horrible performance here.

Kelly: I like your confidence in insisting that you're the best qualified to lead. What I don't like is it coming at Andy's expense. A good leader brings up everyone in his team, no matter what they think of them. Andy is one of your best workers, and you brush him off every time.

As for the task, you got lucky in having Sandy around. Not that you wouldn't have done well, but there was virtually no way you could have failed. Sandy should get your immunity next week.

Apex Corporation:

I was actually hoping that Trump would fire the lot of you this week. It wouldn't have been unwarranted. I want to know who was in charge of the marketing on this task. If it wasn't Chris, that person shouldn't necessarily have been fired this week, but it's important to note for the future. Come on, flyers?!

Jennifer: It's no secret that I'm not a fan of yours, but I have to give you credit. You complain about others to the camera, but when it's time to get to work you're right in there. What's more, you'll support someone you obviously don't like. That's good teamwork.

Another shocker, I agree that you should have avoided the boardroom this week. You were the strongest this week on Apex, which technically isn't saying much, but it's better than being Chris. Or Ivana. But either way, you tried to pick Chris up by the bootstraps and do something with the task.

Ivana and Kevin: I put you together this week because you had the team's biggest success. You convinced Bernadette to give you invaluable help. This would have been key, had you actually had more than one or two customers all day. As it was, you did the best you could with what you had to work with, which says a lot for you.

But Jen, Ivana, and Kevin shouldn't get too confident. They all stunk, and none of them had any better ideas to win.

Chris: Let's get the positive out of the way first: I liked the idea of bringing in vendors, which would have minimized your risk. Unfortunately, you couldn't convince people to come to the store. Whether the flyers were your idea or not, as PM, you're ultimately the one responsible.

That overwith, do I even need to say anything more? It was put up or shut up time, and instead you GAVE up. That's inexcusable. I don't care what happened, you NEVER give up. You claim to want to be like Trump, but the only thing you have is the swagger, and you've far from earned that. You've become an Apprentice laughingstock, more than Omarosa, more than Elizabeth… even more than Sam. You are, in a word, pathetic.

As I watched the episode, I had the thought that Trump threw the bridal store challenge at you because of your snit in the boardroom. I tend to doubt it, but I think it would have been a sick sort of justice. As I said with Sandy, the true test of a manager is how they do when they're out of their element. You crumbled.

Mike DeGeorge has a Bachelor of Science Degree in Business Management from Christian Brothers University in Memphis, and has almost ten years of management experience. He is also Associate Editor of RNO. Email Mike at mikmaria@charter.net.

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