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The Real Gilligan’s Island, Episodes 7 & 8: You're Sure to Get a Smileby William Ingram -- 12/24/2004
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they're here for a long, long time."
-- Theme to Gilligan's Island
Anyway, welcome to the final two zany episodes of the Real Gilligan's Island. You can read my review of the previous episodes, or I can simply give you the short version; rotting fish… Mary Ann and Gilligan eat pizza… alliance… professor banished… Gilligan abandons alliance… Rachel banished anyway.
This episode starts with the skipper being a little worried about his position in the game. Basically, the millionaire and his wife and Mary Ann have been voting as a block. Gilligan was with them for the first vote, but abandoned them for the second vote. The professor, the movie star, and the skipper have all been casting their votes individually and have been easy pickings for the alliance. The skipper is the only independent voter remaining and should be the next one out.
Yet, it may not be that easy. The millionaires are discussing the unfortunate possibility that Mary Ann may vote with Gilligan this time, and maybe secure the skipper's vote as well, to oust one of the millionaires. This is the typical two-dyad situation that happens on the show Survivor.
Mary Ann is concerned that Gilligan has jumped out of the alliance, but she's not sure what she's going to do about it. Later, she lying on the beach, topless, when Glenn comes up and sits down beside her. He says he wants to talk strategy. Yeah, right. Strategy with a topless Mary Ann. That's what he wants.
Amazingly, he really does only want to talk strategy. Mary Ann shakes his hand to assure him that she's still a solid member of the alliance.
All too soon, the radio crackles to life and summons the players to the large picnic tables. They figure it's more gross food. They go on over and discover that it is another gross-food challenge. I guess the producers are running out of ideas for challenges.
Scott, our host, welcomes them to the challenge and has them sit down in front of covered dishes. He tells them to lift the covers. They do and find, not gross food, but their very favorite meals, like hamburgers, steak, salad, baked potatoes, and so on.
The castaways are suspicious. And with goods reason, because Scott tells them that they must share their meals with everyone else. He tells them all to pass their plates down to him. He then pulls out a huge blender and dumps all the food into it. He then blends it all up and pours a disgusting paste into five large glasses. The castaways are disgusted by the "schloop" sound that it makes as it slops into the glasses. Anyone that finishes their glass in the allotted time will get their favorite meal for dinner that night (presumably unblended). Okay, so it is a gross-food challenge after all.
Scott waves his arm and they're off! Most of them are grossed out by the drink, but try to force it down. Skipper, on the other hand, asks for an extra helping. He says it's a shame to waste good food. He was very impressed that he could have ten or twelve different foods in his mouth at the same time. In the five minutes they had, everyone finishes, although Glenn barely makes under the time limit.
Later that night, they get their meals and are very excited. Mindy and Mary Ann even pretend to have orgasms in response to the food. Mary Ann pulls a fast one on the skipper by feeding him a ball of wax and telling him it was a potato. He vows vengeance.
Meanwhile, the strategy discussion continues. The millionaires worry about Mary Ann and Mary Ann wonders if she should stick with the millionaires. The producers don't really show us an definitive answers, however, and we move on.
There's a short montage of the work ethic around camp. Apparently, Gilligan and Mary Ann sleep until noon every day and don't do any work around camp, while the skipper and the millionaires are early risers, catch all the food, and do all the work.
All too soon, however, the radio crackles to life and tells the castaways to report to the lagoon for the next safety challenge.
Scott welcomes them to the lagoon and explains the challenge. There are objects secured to the bottom of the lagoon. Scott will call out one, and everybody will dive in and try to find a copy of the named object. But, there will always be one less object than there are players left. After each dive, whoever doesn't have a named object is eliminated. Last person left wins.
Scott waves his arm and they're off! He calls out, "starfish." They all jump in and the skipper comes up short. Scott calls out "treasure chest." This time, Mary Ann comes up short. Scott calls out, "ship in a bottle." Glenn comes up short and it's down to Gilligan and Mindy. Scott then calls out, "a ship's wheel." Both players are right next to it, but Mindy ends up with it. She wins the life preserver and safety from the vote this evening.
After some more alliance discussions, which can be summarized as "more of the same," the castaways are sent to voodoo village for the vote. They arrive and, one by one, they vote someone off by placing a voodoo doll in the voting box.1 2 3 Next-->
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