Vacation Swap, Episode 1: Aspen Skiing Vs. Cow Field Camping

Two vacations... two families... two weeks... together! Welcome to Vacation Swap, the Wife Swap replacement show for this week. Predictably, two families that are totally ill suited will get to spend two weeks of quality time vacationing with people they have nothing in common with. Meet the families!

First up is the multi-millionaire Hawn family of Atlanta, GA. They live in a 30 room mansion and money is never an object. This family is headed by Chelle (44), the in-shape and attractive mom of four sons, Brian (20), Joe (17), Mark (21), and Ben (13). They consider themselves almost celebrities! Chelle says that it's great to be a Hawn!

Their idea of the perfect vacation is an Aspen, Colorado ski trip. For a mere $10,000 a day they rent the Sardy House, which comes complete with a butler and cook. No one in the Hawn family should ever have to lift a finger. The reason Chelle is doing Vacation Swap is because she wishes she and the boys spent more time together. When they are on vacation, it seems that everyone is off doing their own thing. Chelle is convinced that if the other family doesn't like their Aspen vacation, they obviously don't have good taste! Hopefully she won't be vacationing with people who act and dress like slobs.

Now we get to meet the blue collar Orlando family. They are a boisterous, fun loving family headed by "Big Mama" Jackie (50) and hubby Joe (51). They have three kids, twins Joe Jr. and Stephanie (20) and a younger son Matt (14). Jackie dubs the family "Sicilian Trailer Trash" and shares that some of the neighbors won't speak to them because they are so noisy.

Their yearly vacation consists of hauling their trailer to a cheap campground located at a dairy farm in Southern CA. The Orlandos do everything together on vacation. It's all about bonding. Everyone pulls their own weight. They especially love the ducks. "Quack, quack," mimics Joe Sr. Jackie says the reason she is doing the show is because every year they go camping and she just wants to try something different. Jackie doesn't want to go camping with snooty people, but who knows, maybe it would be a challenge!

The Orlandos are packing up, while Jackie worries that she isn't bringing enough good clothes. They have no idea where they are headed, as they will be going to the Hawns’ vacation spot first. While they wait at the airport, a pilot greets them and takes them to board a private jet. The Orlandos are thrilled and nervous at the same time. Propped on a seat is a note from the Hawns. "We are going on a five star vacation. Look forward to meeting you. The Hawn family."

In Aspen, the Hawns speculate that they will be giving the Orlandos the best darn vacation of their lives! A stretch limo delivers the Orlandos to the Sardy House. Jackie greets the Hawns with hugs for all, as the families exchange their how do ya do's. The Hawns show off the house, explain how expensive the sheets on the bed are, and point out the scenic views from the windows. Yep, it's a nice place, and it’s dinner time! Chelle wants to make sure her sons are presentable, which means shined shoes and dinner jackets. She is going to show the Orlandos some style and what it's like to eat a first class meal. The Hawns sit at the table all neat and pretty in their Sunday-go-to-meeting clothes. As expected, the Orlandos come to dinner in their everyday clothes. Chelle looks absolutely repulsed! Jackie apologizes for their attire, and the family starts to chow down. Chelle points out that Jackie's son's chin is a mere two inches from his plate as he eats! The horror of it all! At the end of dinner, Joe Sr. stands and does a quacking serenade to the delight of his family and the dismay of the Hawns.

The appalling lack of etiquette shown by the Orlandos leaves the Hawn family cold! Chelle has decided she must lay down some rules before things get out of hand. She explains to the Orlandos that luxury is what the Hawn vacation is all about. This vacation will be jam packed with thrills and adventure, and do not forget that the Hawns are in control. As they are all expert skiers, they will team up with the Orlandos and teach them how to ski. "Do not disappoint us! No whining!" The Hawns hate whining. Also, the Orlandos must dress formally at dinner! The fiasco of the previous night's dining experience will not happen again. They expect the Orlandos to act refined, "and that means you, Big Mama!" Chelle is confident that by the end of the week the Orlandos will have had the best vacation of their entire lives!

As Big Mama Jackie sobs to her daughter, Chelle explains to her sons that she had to be tough and come across strong. One of her snob sons says he heard an Orlando crying, which made him laugh. Jackie starts pulling herself together, saying it doesn't matter how you look or what you have as you can still be wonderful people. "We're good people!" The Orlando family is gonna straighten up! They can't guarantee they will be great on the slopes but they are going to try and do their best! Atta girl Big Mama!