The Entertainer, Episode 9: (Bad) Advice for the Remaining 5

Previously on The Entertainer, the high roller suite was invaded by soldiers who took them to Fort Irwin, California, the last stop for troops before their deployment in the Middle East. After witnessing military exercises, they got a chance to perform in a USO show along with a host of other performers, including, of course, their host, Wayne Newton. All of them did well, and nobody was cut as a result of the show.

The episode begins with the treat Wayne promised them at the end of the last episode - a night of pampering. It starts with a group shower - though they are all in their bathing suits. Then it’s time for their massages. Champagne is provided later.

The next day, the contestants are asked to show up at Ice, a local place. Wayne greets them, and says that while there are five of them left, there will only be one winner. After the next test, another performer will be eliminated. Wayne tells them it’s going to get intense.

To be The Entertainer, they will have to engage their audience for an hour to ninety minutes. At this point, Wayne has some concerns as to whether any of them can do it. He tells them they all need to greatly improve their act if they wish to win. He’s got some experts ready to assist them, who will help them improve their performance. He hopes they will embrace their suggestions, and tells them to make good choices in what to include in their act. Frances and Scotty will be watching over them this week. Wayne tells them that he always learns something each time on stage. Sometimes it’s what not to do, and sometimes it’s what to do more of. He asks them to listen to the experts, and decide if they fit into what they do or not. It is the choices they make will be what they will be judged on. He tells them to make good choices.

Wayne tells us that he assembled a team of professionals that are going to give a lot of advice. Some will be good, but most of it will be bad. It will be up to them to decide what advice they should be taking.

The five professionals handing out the bad advice are Josh Lieb, comedy writer, Rick Pessagno, choreographer, Stacy Cox, stylist, Doug DeAngelis, musical director and composer, Bob Steinmiller, performance coach.

The lousy advice comes in all directions. Stacy tries to get the contestants into awful outfits, Doug tries to get them to perform material not suited to their talents. Josh gives some strange comedy advice, and Rick tells them to ignore the audience; turn their back on them while they sing. Delisco buys into quite a bit of it. Dave is advised to get a catch phrase, but Josh rejects Dave’s standard line of “God Protects the Stupid.” Stacy tries to get Jennifer into an outfit appropriate for somebody half her age. Sarah buys into the strange choreography and the idea of doing jokes. Rick tries to alter Joe’s routine, and Bob tries to get him to do “Joe” instead of his regular act based on pop culture items. Jennifer is told to lose her smile onstage; Dave is told to do music. Josh suggests Sarah make faces at the crowd as she performs.

With that advice dispensed and incorporated (or not) into their acts, the cast comes out on stage. Dave admits he’s in an outfit M.C. Hammer would be wearing - if he were on welfare, and Sarah is sporting a short pink wig and an awful costume, which includes a hat and puffed out skirt. Wayne says they’ve taken some of the advice they were given, and says their choices were interesting. Now it’s time for them to perform, with whatever advice they had taken with their material. The audience consists of Wayne, Scotty, Frances, and the five experts who provided all that advice to them earlier.

Sarah is up first, and starts singing with her back to the audience. When she turns around, the full effect of the hair and hat is obvious. She looks terrible, but finishes her song. She then does some comedy, saying she met Bill Clinton and he gave her a cigar.

Delisco is up next, starting with a pratfall. He starts off by doing comedy, telling Wayne that his grandmother called - and wanted her virginity back. He does a rap song, but in private says he hates doing that kind of music. It wasn’t his choice, it was what they “made” him do. Apparently he wasn’t listening when Wayne told them all to make their own choices. On stage, he does moves which are exaggerated hip-hop type moves, such as shaking his booty in front of the audience.

Dave is the third to perform, and tells us he thought something was up when Stacy started telling him how his act would fit in with rap clothing. No disrespect, but he’s trying to earn a contract to perform in Las Vegas - he ignored the tip. He did use some of Josh’s good material though. Rick tells us he wanted Dave to be the dancing comic, putting out moves to go with his punch lines. Dave says he can make it work, because one of his favorite comics is Jim Carrey, who uses physical comedy. Dave goes out on stage and does a great job; he apparently took the best bits of advice and tossed out the bad advice very well.

Jennifer starts out by telling a joke, telling us her boyfriend kept her up all night - doing algebra homework. She’s dressed in the bad costume, but tells the audience she ran into her sister’s wardrobe today. She starts singing, and while she didn’t take the advice to not smile, she does use gestures quite a bit and gets down on her knees at one point. She ends by telling them to rock on.

Joe is the last to perform, and says he incorporated all the advice into his act. Basically, he’s dressed terribly, and used a boom box which he starts himself and he can barely hear, let alone the audience. After part of his routine, he stops the soundtrack and introduces himself. He uses some of the material Josh wrote which fit into his routine, then goes back to his regular act. He thinks by mixing in bits of Joe with his prop material, he can space himself out better to fill up an entire show.