Amazing Race’s Jonathan and Victoria Meet Dr. Phil

If you watched the sixth season of The Amazing Race, you know who Jonathan and Victoria are. The married couple caused a great deal of controversy among viewers. They argued constantly, Jonathan frequently put Victoria down, and in what immediately became a Hall of Shame Moment, an angry Jonathan shoved Victoria’s backpack (while she was wearing it), knocking her off balance. Their relationship was so distressing to witness that they earned a full induction to the Hall of Shame and won a number of dubious honors in the Best of 2004 and Worst of 2004 awards.

The two have claimed repeatedly to be victims of editing, but viewers weren’t so sure. Neither was TV’s Dr. Phil. The self-help guru, known for tough talk and telling it like it is, invited Jonathan and Victoria to talk to him about their relationship on the Dr. Phil primetime special Romance Rescue. Here’s what happened.

Dr. Phil tells us that both CBS and his show received a flurry of emails, letters, and phone calls from viewers in reaction to Jonathan and Victoria’s appearance on The Amazing Race. Phil says viewers were so upset by what they saw that, “people were crying abuse.” But Jonathan and Victoria claim that it wasn’t an accurate portrayal of their relationship, so Dr. Phil took cameras to them to see their normal life.

In the clips, Victoria says, “I think we expected people to love to hate us, but I don’t think we expected people to really hate us.” Jonathan says that they are not at all the people they were portrayed as. The two of them look at newspaper articles about them, looking distraught over the negativity. Jonathan gets ready for a TV interview and laments “playing the villain” and gets upset at seeing a clip of the backpack scene. He sighs, “They’re not going to spin it positively.” If I may interject here, Jonathan, what did you expect?

Victoria says that people often come up to her and ask if she’s okay. She reads an article about them and comments that they always have to refer to her as a “former Playboy model.” Jonathan tells us that Victoria is a model and a “pop artist.” We see her holding a painting, so I’m guessing he means pop artist like Andy Warhol, not like Fantasia. Jonathan says that he runs a day spa and works “in the movie industry.” I’m suspicious about how vague “in the movie industry” is. Does he work in porn? Is that why he was so vague? Or does “in the movie industry” actually mean “at a Blockbuster”?

Victoria says that she and Jonathan fell in love at first sight. She pretty much moved in with him on their first date, and they’ve been inseparable ever since. Jonathan says they don’t normally fight like we saw on TV and are actually the best of friends. We see several clips of the two of them kissing, and then we’re in the studio with Dr. Phil and the couple.

Dr. Phil says that Jonathan claims that the person we saw on The Amazing Race isn’t the real Jonathan. So who is? Jonathan says that what we saw was “a heightened version” of the real him. He gave “raw open emotions” with “no filters.” Dr. Phil reminds him that he yelled, screamed, and shoved, all with cameras rolling. “What were you thinking?” Jonathan says that he and Victoria took the race far too seriously. Phil then asks, point blank, “Are you a jerk?” According to the 2004 RNO Awards, in which Jonathan won “Biggest Jerk,” yes. But Jonathan would disagree. He says that he did all of the things we saw, but that it wasn’t really him. Victoria adds that they learned a lot from being on the show. If you see yourself at your worst, it will help you to be at your best.

Phil says that Victoria said before the interview that she was very nervous about appearing on the show, that it could “destroy us.” What did she mean by that? Jonathan says that they just hate watching the clips of the fighting and shoving, that it’s upsetting. That’s interesting, because I do believe Dr. Phil was talking to Victoria. Victoria says that she is afraid that their “softer side” would not be exposed.

Dr. Phil shows a clip from the race, the scene where Victoria sobbed hysterically while carrying Jonathan’s bag as he raced for the mat. Phil says that he understands the pressure of competition, but, “There is no circumstance in which I could envision my wife being in that much pain and turmoil and my reaction be to scream.” From my sofa, I cheer for Dr. Phil. Jonathan says that Victoria has a tendency to overreact, so basically he ignores what might seem like a big deal to an outsider. He does claim to be sensitive to her feelings.

Dr. Phil starts to set up the next clip, and Jonathan murmurs to Victoria, “You need to speak. It’s too relaxed.” Dr. Phil jumps all over that – is Jonathan coaching Victoria on what to say? Jonathan says no, but that she’s been too quiet and he tends to talk too much. He wants her to participate. Dr. Phil smiles at Victoria and says, “You can think for yourself.” Victoria says that she has a tendency to be too quiet. It’s a disturbing little moment. If Jonathan wanted to convince us that he’s not controlling or dominating, he sure messed up.

We watch the clip in which Jonathan shoves Victoria’s backpack. Jonathan says that she said something that irritated him, he shoved her, and “I regret it every day.” For those of you who didn’t see the episode, he doesn’t look especially remorseful. Phil reports that they’ve received hate mail and death threats, and that Victoria’s own family has asked her if she’s okay. Victoria says that any loving family would ask that question.

Dr. Phil then confronts Jonathan with a question I’ve been wanting the answer to. Jonathan, he says, has claimed he was playing the villain, and he’s also claimed to be a victim of editing. Which is it? Jonathan gives a non-answer, saying that because they were in a race, he felt “a liberty to go further.”

Phil asks Jonathan if he thinks he’s smarter than Victoria. Jonathan diplomatically says that he’s smarter in some areas, and she’s smarter in others. Phil then reads Jonathan a statement he once said: “I will make her understand. I’m a dictator and a mental magician.” What did he mean by that? Jonathan says it’s all in good fun and was just a reference to the Jedi mind trick popularized in Star Wars. He was just “being flamboyant,” and mugging for the camera.

Dr. Phil then asks Jonathan about his comment that Victoria should “be the woman and be quiet.” Jonathan says she needled him with her “be the man and do the physical work” comment, and he needled her right back. Victoria adds that he doesn’t really think women should be quiet. Jonathan adds, “I really do love women. Playboy is a big part of my life.” I swear, that’s really what he said. Apparently Jonathan thinks that if you like to look at naked women, it shows that you really respect them as a gender. Interesting.

Dr. Phil then confronts Jonathan with another hateful statement, about Victoria’s whining and incompetence. Jonathan says it’s all out of context. Okay, then, says Dr. Phil, “put a frame around it for me.” Jonathan says that what we didn’t see was that Victoria had been “screeching at me” for several hours when he said that.

Finally, Dr. Phil says that he’s been dying to tell them what he thinks. He says that he can tell, with great accuracy, whether a married couple will stay married, by one criteria. A wary Jonathan and Victoria ask what that is. Phil says that it’s not whether or not the couple fights, but how that fight ends. Do the fights stay on issue, on point, or do they deteriorate into domination, control, and character assassination? Dr. Phil leaves unsaid how we’ve seen Jonathan and Victoria’s fights end. Jonathan misses the point, and says that he and Victoria never go to bed angry.

Would they go on The Amazing Race again? They say they would, but would be more respectful of each other. Phil says he hopes that now, they can step back and be the couple they want and claim to be.

Finally, do Jonathan and Victoria have anything they’d like to tell those of us watching? Jonathan claims again that much of what we saw was taken out of context. Victoria says that we shouldn’t worry about her. Jonathan then adds that we also shouldn’t worry about them as a couple, or about him. I don’t think any of us were worried about you, Jonathan.

And the segment ends there. The first time I watched it, I was really disappointed. I felt like Dr. Phil let Jonathan off way too easily, and had really hoped to see more of a confrontation, for him to hold Jonathan accountable for his behavior. The second time I watched it, I was a little more satisfied. True, Dr. Phil did not say, “Don’t treat anyone like that, jackass, especially not your wife.” But he did ask Jonathan some tough questions – how his behavior was acceptable, how things would have looked in context – then let Jonathan hang himself with his responses. Besides, would we viewers have been satisfied with anything less than Jonathan walking out of the studio with a black eye?

Betsy Wasser is the Associate Editor of Reality News Online. She can be reached with any comments at betsyw42@hotmail.com.

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