The Apprentice 5, Episode 13: Suite Victory

Last week, on The Apprentice, Sean and Lee had some major vendor problems, but their superior design won the challenge. Allie and Roxanne ganged up on Tammy, Mean Girls style. Trump decreed that Tammy was an ineffective leader, so she was fired. That leaves us with four candidates and a hard time deciding who to vote for. Lee is a worm, and Allie and Roxanne have been incredibly petty of late. That leaves Sean, so I’m rooting for him kind of by default. Who will be fired next?

We pick up, as always, in last week’s boardroom with Allie and Roxanne gunning for Tammy. Meanwhile, Sean makes a salad for whoever comes back, though he admits in an interview that he hopes it’s Tammy. He wants to take her into the bedroom and give her a big… hug. He thinks Allie and Roxanne fight dirty, and his head tells him that Tammy won’t make it. He’s right- Tammy is fired. Roxanne and Allie return to hugs from Lee and say it was “brutal.” Sean is very disappointed and hates that he has to listen to Allie and Roxanne for another week. The women report that Tammy went after Roxanne. Roxanne thinks that Tammy singled her out. Allie thinks it’s crazy that Tammy thinks they ganged up on her. Sean says he’s “bored to tears of the rubbish that Allie and Roxanne come out with.” He intends “to destroy Synergy.” Go, Sean!

Sean answers the phone in his skivvies. Rhona asks them to meet at Estee Lauder corporate headquarters. Trump talks up his fragrance with the executives. Ivanka and Don are the viceroys this week. Trump congratulates Allie and Roxanne for making it through, saying that the boardroom was “not nice.” The task will be focused on design new uniforms for Embassy Suites- the front desk, the breakfast cook, the suite keeper, and the bellman. Each team will have a fashion designer, tailors, and hair and makeup artists. The employees will vote on the best line of uniforms.

Lee wants to run employee focus groups. Sean says the uniforms need to be in keeping with the hotel’s image. Project manager Lee really wants to win and get a 3-1 record. Sean thinks it would be horrible to be faced with “the aesthetic sensibilities” of Allie and Roxanne. He thinks Roxanne looks “like a fruit sundae” in her hot pink jacket. Sean says he’s a proud metrosexual. Lee claims not to know what a metrosexual is, but he sure wears a lot of hair gel to not know.

The men meet with Embassy Suites executives to make sure they understand the branding of the company. The image is high quality and upscale, but informal, polished, but fun. The uniforms should be crisp and stylish, showing some flair, but still functional. The executives encourage them to talk to the employees. Lee is all over that plan. He talks to a bellman first. He’d like the uniform to vary with the weather. Next they talk to the housekeeping staff. (I’m not going to call the “suite keepers.) They find that the staff mostly likes the way things look, but would like a few key changes.

The women meet with the executives as well. Allie wants to show lots of personality and to do more than just tweak the current uniforms. They talk to a woman at the front desk. She hates her pleated pants because “it makes you stick out.” Amen, sister. Allie suggests culottes. No one on the staff knows what they are. I do- they’re sort of a pants-skirt hybrid that tend to be incredibly unflattering. Bad idea, Allie. Allie thinks they have an advantage, being woman. Allie is confident that the men didn’t come up with culottes. Ivanka discovers that they haven’t appointed a PM. Allie has a few wins, and says she wants to do more. Still, she and Roxanne will share responsibility. They hug on being “kind of like co-PMs.”

And now for the Trump Lesson Of The Week: “Work vs. Friendship.” It’s great to have friends, but don’t let your friendships hurt your goals. And now for the Betsy Lesson Of The Week. Most people, after a trip to the grocery store, shove the plastic bags, say, under the sink. You can reuse them as liners for wastebaskets, lunch bags, or whatever. The thing is, though, you never go through as many bags in a week as you do new bags of groceries, so before you know it, you have so many plastic bags under the sink that if the U.S. dollar collapses and the new currency is plastic garbage bags, then you’ll be so rich we’ll go on a show to be your apprentice. It’s a little, silly, really. So the Betsy lesson is this: You don’t need all those bags. Either take them to the recycling area in your grocery store or just throw them away. Really.

Gold Rush meets their designer, Edward. Sean’s housekeeper dress has light blue accents. The chefs have traditional jackets with ventilation under the arms. Lee says they’re “solid,” but not too flashy or out of the box. He’s concerned that the women will come up with something innovative.

Synergy meets their designer, Mark. Roxanne says he’s a hot designer and designs clothes for Melania. He agrees to do culottes. Allie says that the employees want to be stylish more than functional. Oh, Allie. You’re going to lose. If you think someone who works on their feet all day long wants style over comfort, then you are completely out of touch. Allie says that the current uniforms are outdated and frumpy. Next they do the woman at the front desk and put her in a skirt. Roxanne makes a face- in an interview, she says the women wanted pants. Of course, she does not share this little insight with Allie, so it’s really quite useless.

The men buy reams and reams of navy blue pinstripes. Lee is impressed at how well Sean’s doing. He likes working with him a lot.

Synergy’s staff is sewing away. Allie fusses over the cuffs- she doesn’t want them to be too dramatic. She also doesn’t like the zipper. Then she says the fabric is wrong. Roxanne says Allie shouldn’t be rude to their designer. She thinks Allie’s attitude towards him is “an embarrassment to the Trump organization.” To top things off, Allie calls him by the wrong name.

Sean coaches the models. Meanwhile, Roxanne talks hair. She’s confident they’ll win. Allie and Roxanne are wearing black dresses with turquoise scarves. It’s not a good look.

The staff arrives for the fashion show. Gold Rush is up first. The front desk uniform is a simple pinstriped suit with a green scarf. Synergy has a wrap jacket with green satin ties. The women note that the men are more traditional. The men’s breakfast cook uniform includes cargo pants and venting under the arms. Roxanne thinks the designs are stuffy and safe. Synergy has a really stupid outfit for the breakfast cook with a khaki, asymmetrical fitted jacket. Lee says the cooks hate it and it looks like a space age chef. The Gold Rush bellman has a waterproof coat and removable linings, good for all kinds of weather. Ivanka loves it. Synergy’s has the silly giant cuffs we saw before, a zipper up the front and is short sleeved. It is totally impractical. Sean says he’d feel “completely immasculated” wearing it. Housekeepers are last. The men’s have similar dresses to what they have now. The women’s are khaki with culottes and giant puffy sleeves. Sean says it’s horrible, and he is right. “The cast of Dynasty called. They want their shoulder pads back,” he says. The Synergy light tan would show dirt like crazy, and wouldn’t the breakfast chefs have all kinds of problems with stains? They’re really pretty awful. Allie is proud of their uniforms. She says “they’re impeccable,” and that Gold Rush lacks detail.