The Apprentice: Los Angeles, Episode 7 MVP and LVP – Taking Out the (White) Trash

Yo yo yo this is the Apprentice beat doooown, dawg. Do you remember when the Apprentice rewards actually had something to do with the tasks? I guess Snoop Dogg probably drives a Lexus for the bling. I must admit though, this was one of the few products advertised on the show that made me want to take my little self down to the car dealership.

Team Blonde

You know a candidate with a nickname of “the blonde” isn’t going to do very well. And Jenn didn’t. A score of 84 is rough—especially since people taking customer satisfaction surveys usually rate high. I think this is one of the clearest losses in the season. Lexus is luxury. I like the “sixth sense” theme—I am thinking a The Illusionist kind of thing. The team failed Jenn I think, leaving her flapping in the wind both in the Boardroom and in the creative process.

The event looked poor from start to finish. We don’t know who missed the signage deadline, Angela or Derek, but I don’t think one sign would have made a difference. The presentation started off strong, and I can tell Jenn has a lot of ability. I’m saddened by her fumbling. Never rely on a television for a speech. If you do, you’re just asking for technical difficulties. I like go carts, but I wouldn’t call them luxurious. Also, don’t say things like “you are the first people in the world to see the Lexus 2007.”

Jenn is lucky she didn’t also get fired for her cute remarks about just firing Derek. Trump is the lord of the arbitrary. While it might not be the most politic thing to call yourself “white trash” in a business situation, it’s not precisely firing material. I think everybody in the room except Trump (and maybe Surya?) thought Trump was being a tad bit ridiculous.

Not that Derek still shouldn’t have been fired. He shrugged when Angela asked his advice and tried to toss the sign issue off on her. We don’t know why they missed the deadline, but they did, and I don’t think it’s all Derek’s fault. Derek did make some visible mistake, like talking to the “crack head Yanni” instead of telling him to circulate through the crowd. Derek also gets a smack for not giving Jenn a chance in the beginning, too. He was good at the politicking, but not so good at tasks or (apparently) the Boardroom. Derek helps in the crunch, but he seemed all too eager this season to shrug things off on someone else. A fun guy to have around the office, but not the next Apprentice. After all, the only jokes Trump laughs at are his own.

I wonder how many brainstorming sessions Trump has been in? According to him, you can’t say stuff off the top of your head, but that’s what brainstorming is. You start with the ridiculous and move on to the more probable. It gets the juices flowing. Everything should be off the top of your head, and coming up with the idea isn’t the same as saying “THIS IS WHAT WE HAVE TO DO OR I WILL KILL YOU ALL.”

Speaking of ridiculous, Trump told Heidi her stock had dropped significantly after these losses. Apparently if you start off strong, you have to carry your team through every task on your back. I’m beginning to think that the people trying to fly under the radar are more intelligent than I previously thought. Trump is ready to bring the crazy and lop your head off for a misspoken word.

Team Hair>

In another example of “white” getting someone in trouble, the pictures of Surya writing on the whiteboard while his team actually did work behind him are pretty hilarious. This week, the team shimmered, in large part because of Stefani. The buffet looked exquisite—and food’s half the battle in event planning. I think she’s done a wonderful job in almost every task I’ve seen her in. For some reason, Arrow’s weaknesses became their strengths this time around. They were very well organized, had a beautiful presentation, and didn’t seem the least bit scattered.

Not because of Surya, though. It’s a bad sign when the project manager feels out of control of the situation. It’s his responsibility to take control. Surya’s only mark in this competition seems to be on whiteboards. Trump probably won’t fire Surya next time Hair loses—I’m seeing a double firing of Nicole and Tim in a future episode, not because of anything they do on task, but because of some peccadillo that only a Trump could hate—but that doesn’t mean he won’t get fired in the end. Part of being a team leader is not separating from the masses. He needs to join in play and in work. Separating himself from the group leaves him with no allies. He still seems overly silent in the Boardroom.

Speaking of joining in the freestyling—James… Frank… keep your day jobs.

Nicole actually impressed me this week a little bit. She seemed to have a lot better grasp on the subject matter than Tim, who didn’t seem to understand the concept of a dead battery. With customer satisfaction ratings so high, they couldn’t have been too horrible. Either way, they would probably be more efficient when assigned to different tasks.

Arrow’s got the momentum… but how long will it last?

So, who gets this week’s MVP?

Like new frost in the morning, a pure white light shimmers, gradually alighting on—Stefani! For your excellent event planning and clear willingness to step up, on and over Surya, you get the Reality Television Goddess’ commendation. The cool seat beside me is gently warmed with your competence and your smile. Jenn actually receives a nod of approval, because she took her firing with such good cheer. I loved her “taxi moment.” I think that she knows, after seeing Derek go, that she wouldn’t have fit in the Trump organization anyway.

But where there is an approving nod, there is also a whack of the rod. Jenn embraced the wrong idea, failed to come up with any of her own, and messed up the presentation—setting the wrong tone for the entire event. But what’s this? Derek is struggling to reach my scepter as well, racing Jenn for the position of LVP. Derek claiming that he “meant” to be a smart ass and get himself fired. Derek trying to shrug out of taking any responsibility and giving limited help on the one task he was assigned. They’re neck and neck… looks like it’s going to be a photo finish, and…

If Trump can cop out, so can I. Derek and Jenn both failed this week, so they both get beaten until they’re blue in the face. They didn’t share a cab, but they do share my wrath.

Now, let us now pelt them with rotting fish.

Things I want to see:

• Trump walking into a boardroom dressed in a grim reaper costume.
• Muna telling Trump he’s a “poser.”
• More of Trump’s “yes men” actually contradicting him—go Randall!

Jennifer McBride is a senior in journalism at the University of Oregon. Her lifetime ambitions involve bigamy and a plethora of cats. Job offers and Viagra ads can be sent to her at vegetathalas@yahoo.com, though you should use the subject line “Not Spam” if you expect her to find them.

Be sure to sign up for our e-mail update so you can stay informed about new articles on the site! And take a look at the rest of the site. You can find all of our recent articles on this show at our The Apprentice page and take a look at our sections on Survivor: Exile Island and American Idol 5. You can even buy reality show stuff at our Reality TV Store!

For more news about The Apprentice, be sure to check out SirLinksALot: The Apprentice!