American Inventor 2, Episode 4: Big Apple Blues

Welcome back to American Inventor 2! This week’s episode brings us creativity, innovation, ingenuity, and of course, crazy. This episode is filled with laughter among the judges, and will have you laughing out loud at home.

Nick, our host, tells us that two winners have already been crowned in both L.A. and San Francisco: Rick DeRennaux and his H.T. Custom Built Racers in L.A., and Greg Chavez and his Guardian Angel in San Francisco. Tonight, two more inventors will join them and be one step closer to claiming the million-dollar prize and the title of American Inventor.

This week, our search continues in Chicago and New York. Each inventor must come face-to-face with our esteemed judges, George Foreman, Sara Blakely, Pat Croce, and Peter Jones. Dun dun dunnnn! They are looking for the next great invention that will change the world. Last week, their search began in New York and Chicago. Chicago has already provided our judges with incredible inventions, and these inventors became Chicago finalists. Meanwhile, New York has completely failed to live up to expectations. We see quick flashback shots from last week of our judges in the New York presentation room. Peter: “No.” Pat: “No.” Sara: “No.” George: “No.”

Eeek, they better get a move on in the Big Apple, and fast! Our search resumes in New York City. First up to face the judges is 47-year-old Wigberto Delgado, a building engineer, with his invention called The Urinator. Say what? The purpose of it is that you would never have to lift or lower the seat. There is a funnel attached to the toilet to urinate into, obviously for a man to use. But I suppose a woman could use it if she is extremely talented. Hey, ya never know when it comes to people and what they can do, right?

After his demonstration, Peter chimes in with, “I’m gonna urinate in a funnel? To expect men of America to go to the toilet in a cone every day is beyond me. It’s a no.” It’s an all-around no for Pee in a Funnel Guy.

As Wigberto leaves the room, Peter asks the other judges, “Can’t you just be happy in America with the toilet you’ve got? Why do you have to keep coming up with these crazy ideas for toilets? You sit on the toilet, and you go.” Haha! I have to agree with him! Americans are always thinking up new things for toilets, it’s so true!

Next up is 28-year-old Darrell Fertakes, a self-proclaimed inventor. His invention is called Safety Bands. You wear these inflatable headbands that will inflate upon impact if you fall and hit your head. Uhhhh, wouldn’t it kinda be too late by the time the thing inflated? Seriously, where is the common sense here?

He’s also got Safety Bands for the waist for surfers; in case they get into trouble in the water, they can push a button and the band will inflate, saving them from drowning. If someone surfing gets into trouble in the water, they will be lucky to even be able to get their bearings, let alone press a button. The judges stop him from talking at this point. It doesn’t last for long, though.

Sara gives him a yes, as her brother is a surfer. Peter is a no. George is a yes. Pat says, “No way am I going to give a yes to a headband. It’s a no.” Next, please? No such luck, the kid’s got more to try to sell them. He goes on about cancer and his healthy, filtered air invention, and a tissue in a Ziploc bag, into which he loudly blows his nose. OK, eww. I can tell that Peter is about to start bowing his head and pinching the bridge of his nose any minute now.

Darrell now goes into his invention of fruity-flavored “healthy cigarettes.” MmmKAY, listen up, Rooty-Tooty-Foolish and Fruity, and listen good. “Healthy” and “cigarettes” are two words that do not go together, period, end of story. Thank you for calling. Click. Peter to the rescue by telling Darrell it’s a no for everything, especially the headband. He points him to the door and tells him to go straight out that way. Thank you, Peter!

Host Nick welcomes us back after the commercial break to tell us that our search for the next great American Inventor continues in Chicago, which is rocking compared to New York, where they still don’t even have one finalist.

Up now is 44-year-old John Stark, a truck dispatcher, with his invention. It is called the Easy Squeeze Earplug. The earplugs are little balloons that you squeeze to inflate inside your ear. Yes. He invented little balloons. To stick in your ears. For what, I don’t know; he doesn’t tell us the purpose of them.

George asks to see one of them. Oh, no. Pat immediately stops that puck from getting into the net by quickly saying that he thinks it’s time to vote. John gives one of the balloons to George so he can see it. Sara, Peter, please hurry and help Pat out here!

Peter answers the call of duty and pleads with George, who is looking at the balloon. “George, don’t even think about it. Come on. No. I can’t take it anymore. [laughs] I can’t. I really can’t.” It’s an all-around no for the Easy Squeeze Shutout.

Next is 39-year-old Elaine Cato, a beauty pageant director. She is a single mom raising two daughters, and she wants them to not have to grow up in poverty as she had as a child. It’s important to her to be a good role model for them.

Her invention is the Backless Brassiere. She demonstrates on a model, and then informs us that she is also wearing the product. She shows that she is visibly supported from the front, with her top on, of course, and then turns around to show us her backless top that shows no bra strap. She gives a great presentation. She shows us how the straps only go from the top of the bra and over the shoulder to hook comfortably under the arm. I’m sold! Four yeses; the judges are all impressed with her and her product.

Up next is 46-year-old David Skotske, a laborer. Haha! I don’t believe it! Actually, I do believe it. He has with him yet another toilet contraption. Peter’s face is priceless. It’s called the Hands-Free Toilet Seat/Lid Lifter and Closer, and is operated by a foot pedal to go up and/or down. He explains. Oh! I knew it! Peter is doing his head-bowed, pinching his nose bridge thing. I knew it wouldn’t be long. David demonstrates.

Pat declares it’s time for a vote. Peter: “Ridiculous. No.” Sara: “I wouldn’t have that in my home. No.” Pat’s a no. George votes yes after the other judges all said no. He wants it for his house. I’d put money on no one watching the show actually being surprised at this. Peter and Pat look at each other across Sara and George.

Next is 43-year-old Weston Hinden, self-employed. His invention is the Snake Rack, an ergonomically designed leaf rake and mop. Immediate “no”s from Sara, Peter, and Pat. George says he’s the best mopper in the world and, yep, you guessed it, he gives him a yes. Hmm, anyone else see a pattern here, or is it just me? You decide, as George is on a roll, much to the combination of dismay and amusement of his other judge friends. Peter is bowing his head and pinching his nose bridge again.

Jessica Bilski, 30, a product manager, has brought Mark in Time, a dry-erase round schedule board, to be used for parents to schedule everything for their children. Ummm, hello? Doesn’t everyone already have one of these? I know I do. The Supernanny Jo takes one with her to every family she visits! And she’s on national TV! How this all got overlooked is completely beyond me.

Immediate “no”s from Pat, Sara, and Peter. George votes yes; he wants one for his house. Of course he does. The other judges look at him and each other incredulously. George, you can buy one of those at any office-supply store, and it even comes with markers.

Jeffrey Bretz and Andrea Thomas, both 46. The Hands Free Flashlight is their invention. It goes around one’s neck and is adjustable to move the direction of light anywhere that is needed. “No”s from Sara, Pat, and Peter. George votes yes and tells the other judges that he would buy that. Pat says, “George, you would buy anything that came on the show!” They all laugh.