Here Come the Newlyweds 2, Episode 7: Three Star Review

The episode kicks off with the couples meeting for breakfast and there is definitely tension in the air. Pat greets the couples and introduces the first challenge, announcing that the grand prize is currently up to $410,000. For this challenge, Pat will ask the couples questions about what they think will be true at their tenth anniversaries. The object of the challenge is to correctly match your spouse’s answer. Every time a couple matches, Pat will add $5000 to the pot.

The first question asks the couples if they are having a big party or an intimate evening for their anniversary. The Newbery’s match with an intimate evening and the Corlisses match with a big party. Kenny and Makayla McMorris, however, don’t match. She says party and he says intimate evening.

Next question – Will the kids be with the couples or with a baby sitter for the anniversary? The Newberys match with babysitter, as do the Corlisses and McMorrises. I get sending the kids off if you are doing the intimate evening route, but if you are having a big party just let the kids come!

Now Pat wants to know if the couples are driving a minivan or a sports car in their imaginary futures. Rich and Audra Newbery match with sports car and Audra says they will never drive a minivan. Just you wait and see Audra! It’s kind of hard to fit car seats and strollers in a sports car. The Corlisses match with a sports car as well. The McMorrises don’t match as Kenny says minivan and Makayla says sports car.

The next question is, “Does your wife have her heart set on an anniversary diamond ring or diamond bracelet?” The Newbery’s matching streak comes to an end as Audra says ring and Rich says bracelet. The Corlisses and McMorrises both match with ring.

Now the couples need to choose between a full time maid and a full time cook. The Newberys both say maid for a match. The Corlisses and McMorrises also have matches with maid.

The last question asks if they will do what works in the bedroom for their anniversary or try something special. The Newberys match with something special and the Corlisses match with do what works. The McMorrises, unfortunately, don’t match, as Kenny wants to do what works and Makayla wants to do something special.

I think Kenny and Makayla need to talk a bit about how they see themselves as a couple down the road. They mismatched half the questions!

Pat tells the couples that $70,000 has been added to the pot and it now totals $480,000. Pat says that’s the biggest pot the show has ever had. Since this is only the second season, I’m not really impressed by that statistic.

Pat asks the men to come with him and tells the women to stay behind and relax. The men have to make a 40th anniversary video for their wives. There is a team of Hollywood makeup artists that will age each of the men 40 years so their videos look authentic.

The woman are having lunch and Marlo shares something I really didn’t want to hear. She prefaces her comment by addressing Makayla and Audra and saying, “This stays between us.” Apparently Marlo forgot she was being filmed for a reality television show. Turns out Mark has tattoos on his penis. Yup, that’s right. Mark has a tattooed penis. He has three stars tattooed down there. No good explanation for why he doesn’t have four stars.

Pat shows the women the fortieth wedding anniversary videos; Rich Newbery is up first. Truthfully, he doesn’t look that much different. He just has grey hair and a few more wrinkles. Rich says a bunch of loving things to Audra. Kenny McMorris is up next and he is hamming it up, but he is still sweet to Makayla. He definitely does look older, although forty years is a stretch. Mark Corliss is last and he looks completely different! He’s got a grey wig and age spots all over his face. He makes a lot of bad jokes about how their kids are in jail and says he can’t believe they’ve actually been married for forty years. Marlo looks pissed off that Mark couldn’t say anything romantic.

At dinner the couples start to talk about the final two, and it is clear there is a lot of tension in the house. It seems that the Newberys and Corlisses are close, and the McMorrises are on the outs. It’s an interesting set of conversations, because we have never seen anything that would indicate that the Corlisses and Newberys are close or any reason why the McMorrises would be the odd couple out.

The next day Pat meets the couples in the living room to tell them about the challenge for safety. The challenge is to see how prepared the couples are for their first child. As a relatively new mother myself, I think this is a great challenge. First the couples need to agree on some common child rearing decisions. They need to match each other’s answers to get their baby. They then need to put the baby in a stroller and race through an obstacle course and perform various tasks before they can put their baby to sleep in a pack-n-play.

The couples are off! The child rearing decisions are: spank vs. not spank; cloth diapers vs. disposable diapers; circumcised vs. not circumcised, and formula feed vs. breast feed. Oh, and how many children they are planning to have? I have an issue with the feeding and the diaper questions because choices given aren’t mutually exclusive – you can formula feed and breast feed a baby, and you can use cloth and disposable diapers.

The Newberys match first and get their baby and run off. The McMorrises follow soon after, followed closely by the Corlisses. The “babies” are all crying. The couples now have to change the babies’ diapers and get them dressed. I’ve got to tell you, if I threw my son around the way these couples are throwing these babies around, he’d be crying a lot harder than these baby dolls are.

Next the couples need to make a bottle of formula for the baby, which they all do quickly. Then they need to fix a flat on the minivan and load the car up. The Newberys seem way out of their element with the flat tire. The McMorrisses and Crolisses fix their flats before the Newberys and load their babies up in the cars. The babies are in front facing car seats, which is a big no no for an infant! I hope none of the couples are taking parenting notes from this challenge.

Now the couples need to assemble their pack-n-play and put the baby down for a nap. This is a hard challenge. I’m pretty sure my husband has no idea how to assemble our pack-n-play and it takes me a while to set it up every time. It looks like all three couples are getting close, but the McMorrises finish first and are safe from the vote.

Pat offers the McMorrises $50,000 to give up their safety. Kenny and Makayla talk it over and decide to give the money back. Wow. I thought they might actually take it. The McMorrises now get to decide who goes with them to the finals as the other two couples’ votes will cancel each other out.

The next day, Pat meets the couples in the backyard for the single vote. Pat asks the McMorrises to stand up and announce which couple they want to bring to the finals with them. They choose the Corlisses, so the Newberys are going home. I have to say, I’m not surprised.

Next week, on the season finale, the couples that were voted out return!

Jennifer Tsao lives in Manhattan with her husband and infant son. By day she has a typical desk job and at night she obsesses over reality TV. You can reach her at realityjenn@gmail.com.

For more news about reality TV, be sure to check out SirLinksALot: Here Come the Newlyweds and The Source: Reality TV Headlines!