Manhunt, Episode 5: Last of the Mohicans

The standings are as follows: JK, Wesley, Jesse, James, Joe, and Lyzz: Eliminated; Karen, Mandy, Romey, and Lucas: 2 hits; Ed, Jim, and Nicole: 1 hit.

Hunters Island, Day 5
Crooked Finger Pass
We join Big Tim where we left off last week. Lyzz was eliminated by Rain and Jim surrendered to Big Tim after being marked for the first time. They are waiting on the trail below the ridge. The big guy is pacing up and down the jungle trail, bellowing like a wounded bison. “You don’t think I’m out there with the wounded boars. You don’t think I’m watching your every move? Which one of you pathetic cowards wants to join them (Jim and Lyzz)? “ Big Tim is going to slip up one of these days and say “humans” instead of his usual “maggots,” thereby revealing himself to be the evil replicant he really is. His fellow members of the WWF don’t call him the “Prototype” for nothing. Mandy and Romey are hiding by themselves. Karen, Jim, and Ed are huddled together. They’re all too terrified to make a break for it. Big Tim paces back and forth, “maggots,” “crap,” etc., until Romey finally makes a move. She realizes that Big Tim is too close to make a run for it, so she executes a rapid deployment maneuver – straight up the nearest tree.

Big Tim orders Koa to , “flush them down to the road.” Karen, Lucas, and Ed decide to make a collective break for freedom. Unfortunately for Karen, she moves out first. The big guy spots her making her way across the trail, “Oh, man. I’ve got a dead dog behind that tree.” Karen tries to run back up the hill when she sees Big Tim bearing down on her but it’s too late. Karen is marked for the third time and is eliminated. Koa goes after Lucas, saying “Hey, Gimpy, you want some paint?,” but his shot goes wide. A cease fire is announced.

The group huddles together on the trail. Karen kicks herself for “not going down together,” She has blown her chance for winning the money and is taking it hard. They all hug each other.

Big Tim breaks up the reunion. “OK, losers. I’m not gonna shave you now. I’m gonna make you sit and wait to think how it’s gonna be.” He stalks off, Rain follows obediently, Koa assumes his usual toady-like smirk.

Jim, Nicole, Lucas, Ed, Romey, and Mandy head off into the jungle. Jim is kicking himself for finally getting marked. “I have to admit, I’m not very happy about that (hit).” Lucas has found a new stick, but it’s a pathetic-looking specimen. Mandy says, “The intensity of the game has changed. There are more markers for less people.”

Guillotine Field – 6 miles to Safe Zone (Readers beware, location names are kind of gruesome from now on)
Another fake map scene. This one shows only Nicole, Lucas and Jim. Lucas is wearing the headband he wears throughout the show. Nicole and Jim are shown wearing bandannas, which neither of them wear in the show.

Black Tar Swamp – 5 miles to Safe Zone
The group finds itself at the edge of a large swamp. They are not happy. “It’s poop and mud and it smelled like it too,” says Lucas. They try to cross a stagnant stream at one point. The tired contestants make a hash of the crossing, ending up covered with the poop/mud. Nicole is especially inept. She falls far short of the other side. The mud she kicks up splatters her face and even goes up her nose. She stands in the mud, laughing, “I think I’m gonna cry,” she says. As if that isn’t bad enough, they realize they’ve gone the wrong way and must recross the stream. Of course, the hunters spot them about this time. Romey tries to blame their error on the “bad map”?!

Screaming Skull Trail – 3 miles to Safe Zone
Ed addresses the new group mindset, “Everybody seems like they’re kind of more pulled in and on guard a little bit. Because everybody knows our group is gonna get real small real quick.”

Losers Bluff – 700 yards to Safe Zone
As the group emerge from the forest, they see their destination – a lovely white tent set next to the ocean. The bucolic setting is almost too much for these hardy survivors. Before their final plunge to safety, they each wax sentimental. Mandy says she’s, “calm, relaxed and at peace.” Ed calls the setting “paradise,” and Romey cries. But, now it’s back to the hunt. Nicole says, “We knew if we could see the Safe Zone, the hunters weren’t gonna make it easy for us to get there. “Jim’s leadership skills kicks in, “Be very careful; we’re sitting ducks. It’s a good place for an ambush(?)” Why is it these guys always go the most obvious route, straight down the path, bunched up herd-style? Especially if they know it’s a trap! At least try something bold or unexpected. What do they have to lose? Just their sheep mentality.

So here they come, straight into the hunter’s trap. The camera shows an oblivious foot setting off the trip wire. The inevitable smoke and bombs transpire. Rain and Koa jump up from behind the great big “I’m a hell-of-a-good hiding place” rock they’re crouching behind. The group scatters as Rain and Koa chase down their favorite targets. Rain closes in on Mandy, who obligingly trips. She’s hit for the third time, and out of the game. Big Tim fires at Romey twice, missing each time. Rain is on-the-money today; she goes after Lucas, firing at him just before he runs out of range. Her shot hits him right in the back of the head, sending him somersaulting head-first into the ground. Strike three for Lucas.

Meanwhile, Ed is booking it as fast as his bug-eyed, weaving bod can carry him. It seems like Mr. Coaster is going to slide right through this ambush as well, but fate, aka Big Tim, has a different idea. The big guy springs up in front of Ed, who almost leaps out of his shoes in surprise. Big Tim marks him with a “welcome to loserville” greeting. Romey is the first to make it to the Safe Zone. Jim dodges Koa, who misses. Lucas radios to Jim, telling him to “zigzag, zigzag, you’ve got Barbie on you.” Jim’s artful dodging is successful, both Koa’s and Rain’s shots go wide. But Big Tim is waiting at the end of the trail. He tries the same technique on Jim that he used on Joe in episode one to get him to surrender. But Jim ignores his bluff too, and runs past to safety. Jim joins Romey and a cease fire is announced.

Ed and Nicole run to join Jim and Romey. Ed’s deer-in-the-headlights look has been replaced with one of macho-bravado. He proudly shows off his paintball mark, calling it a “smiley face,” while he brandishes a fist at the camera. “Bring it on, bring it on,” he boasts. “I knew I was gonna make it to the end. Everybody else was gone, we were the Last of the Mohicans.” The eliminated contestants trickle down to join the final four. This dampens the mood of the group. It’s kind of a bummer when the losers have to look at the loot of the victors. A closer look at the Safe Zone shows it to be the same challenge reward dining tent that Colby and Jerri enjoyed in Survivor 2, which has been magically transported through time and space to the Hawaiian jungle. But dinner will have to wait, there’s a shavin’ goin’ on.

Big Tim speaks, “Since you guys are so group-oriented, let’s have a little group haircut.” In a move towards gender-unity, Rain bobs all the women’s ponytails. She operates the shaver in a business-like manner, no macho-posturing. This no-nonsense approach must have been learned at her American Gladiators job. Big Tim gets to shave Lucas, who takes his turn philosophically, “You come 40 miles and you can’t make it 100 yards.” He gets a Mohawk instead of a tonsure like James. Big Tim must be getting soft, he’s easing up on the humiliating hair-dos. (Notice how Lucas’ new do is easily hidden by his headband.) Big Tim even throws a bone to the final four, “They’ve endured 5 days of living hell with true grit and courage, and for that they’ll be rewarded.” What a nice change from “maggots.”

Let’s take a look at our survivors: Ed, Romey, Nicole, and Jim. As Preacher Jim might say, “Neither the first shall be last, nor the last shall be first.” These guys weren’t the strongest or the bravest players, but neither were they the weakest. No, what we have here are the “middlers.” The ones who were just fit enough to keep up with the group, but not outrace it. The ones who didn’t draw much attention, or fire. The ones who managed to glide along while their comrades were picked off one-by-one. As a bonus, there is no gauntlet in this episode.

But to the victors, go the spoils. Ed, Romey, Nicole, and Jim enter their candle-lit tent to find a banquet table set with silver and fine china. On each plate is a large gift-wrapped box. In the first real instance of true television drama in this show, the group opens their presents to find their own personal paint-ball gun. Finally, it’s time to play. Nicole says, “We’re gonna kick some butt.” Jim adds, “Finally, things were gonna be fair. We weren’t gonna be little gazelles running away from the hunters. Now we’d have a choice of whether to run away or to fight.” Ed becomes even more bold, pointing his paintball gun at the camera in an imitation of Big Tim, “I load my gun, and shoot my gun!”

The show ends with the middlers enjoying a meal of artichokes, cheesecake, and coca cola. The sentimental mood continues as everyone reminisces about their fallen comrades and speaks about the “sixth day.”

I hereby make my prediction for the winner of Manhunt – Nicole. She has only one mark against her. She’s fit enough physically to make it and she’s fairly scrappy. Jim will probably be singled out by the hunters because he’s the leader and there will be minimal hiding opportunities in the last episode. The same goes for Ed; there are too few members of the group left for him hide among them, and he already has two marks. Romey is fit enough, but she has two marks also.

Episode 6 – It’s payback time as the prey turn on the hunters. Watch the free-for-all conclusion of Manhunt next week.

Melinda Smith is a technical illustrator and writer with a background in graphic arts. She and her family live in Cincinnati, Ohio.

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