RNO Roundtable: ‘Survivor: South Pacific’ Pre-Show Predictions

Sting7: It is very hard to keep from thinking of Cirie when reading Stacey’s profile. Cirie had incomprehensible skills in the social game! Does Stacey? She will need to be well above average, at least, to get very far. She may be seen as a liability at challenges, and let’s just face it: Ageism is alive and well in Survivor. Stacey will need to sharply find the right alliance and be loyal to it throughout to have a shot.

David: There really isn’t much that stands out for me about Stacey, other than that she’s a mortician. Presumably, that ironically gives her good social skills as she has to deal with the living who have just lost a loved one. But can she turn that sort of kindness into a weapon for use on Survivor? I just don’t see anything to make me answer “yes” to that question. So for that reason, I have to believe she will be out pre-jury.

Whitney

William: Even though I hate the idea and have rallied against it for years, can we just let Probst have his way and do Celebrity Survivor already? For one thing, it’ll hopefully stop the producers from casting D-list celebrities on the real show, and for another, Whitney’s about the level of “celebrity” that they’d be able to get. For those mercifully ignorant of Whitney’s existence, she placed fifth on the fifth season of Nashville Star, and even that was a bit generous. She talks more in her video about how awesome it’ll be for her “fans” to see her than she does about the actual game, which sickens me. She has no strategy, no concept of the game, and pretty much no clue. She’s aware of the bugs, which she’s fine with since she grew up in the sticks, but otherwise she has no idea what she’s getting into. Even in the promos leading up to the season, the big scene that she gets is jumping into the water while voicing over, “I didn’t think we’d be down to our underwear that quickly.” I’m going to despise every moment that I see her this season. Hopefully like all the “celebrities” before her (save Taj), she’ll be gone before we figure out which generic blonde she is.

Ken: Her name may be Whitney, but it may as well be “generic pretty blue-eyed blonde with entertainment industry aspirations.” She describes herself as smart, physically fit, and not afraid of anything. For her sake, that better include Tribal Council. Thing is, if you say you’re smart, you’re probably not as much as you think you are, and physical fitness and fearlessness can only get you so far. Unless she’s in an alliance with some of the hunger- and testosterone-driven males in her tribe, this country singer could be singing the blues.

Chris: First of all, Probst seems to think that Whitney’s tattoos make her a rebel because she’s a country singer. Um, no. Tattoos are not uncommon among girls who like country music. A Pat Boone cover band, maybe. But not girls with a twang. I just don’t see anyone who decides to list the combination of “Jesus and Elvis” as their inspirations as having the killer instinct to win this game. Nothing against either Jesus or Elvis; I just can’t see, say, Richard Hatch or Boston Rob or Brian Heidik saying that. She won’t go soon because she’s pretty, but I see her being a potential pre-merge axe if numbers start dwindling for her tribe.

Jenn: Whitney will be the first person to make the jury.

Jeffrey: Whitney claims to be outgoing, happy, and honest. Honesty is not the best policy on Survivor. While she is fit and probably can hold her own in challenges, sometimes somebody has to go and she's my pick. I hope I'm wrong, though.

Sting7: She admires Jesus and Elvis. Makes me wonder if Central Casting was looking for “typical blonde country singer.” My advice to Whitney: Cling to the girls and stay as pretty as possible. That alone might get her to the jury. It’s very possible Whitney may be holding her skills close to the vest, and I hope she is, because there isn’t anything I’m seeing that says she will win Survivor.

David: I don’t have much to add to what my fellow writers have already said – except one thing: Her pet peeve is people who talk down to her. I suspect she will get some of that in the early goings of this show because, well, she will look and act like she needs to be talked down to! That could turn her into part of a rebellion against a strong leader. If so, she could make it a while, but I suspect my other picks would be turned on their heads. If not, it’s goodbye early. I may split my options here and say she makes the jury but still hope for the best with my earlier picks.

Who will NOT make the jury?

William: Is it just me or is this cast uber-religious this season? Seriously, it ranks up there with Marquesas, Guatemala, and Samoa with the number of Jesus freaks. Like half the cast either listed Jesus as their inspiration or made some biblical reference in their bio. Scary. Anyway, my pre-jury evictees are Christine, Dawn, Edna, Keith, Mark, Semhar, Stacey, and Whitney.

Ken: Albert, Christie, Edna, Jim, Keith, Mikayla, Sophie, Stacey.

Chris: Coach, Brandon, Edna, Mark, Semhar, Sophie, Stacey, Whitney.

Jenn: Coach, Dawn, Elyse, John, Mark, Ozzy, Semhar, and Sophie.

Jeffrey: Brandon, Coach, Dawn, John, Mark, Stacey, Whitney, Rick.

Sting7: Christine, Coach, Dawn, Jim, Semhar, Whitney, Edna, Sophie.

David: Brandon, Christine, Dawn, Elyse, Keith, Mikayla, Semhar, and Stacey.

Who will make the final two (three)?

William: There are some solid contenders this season, especially with the presence of Redemption Island as a means to advance the physical threats. My final three are Jim and Ozzy, with Elyse as the potential third.

Ken: Ozzy, Elyse, (John).

Chris: Mikayla, Dawn, (Jim).

Jenn: Keith, Edna, (Stacey).

Jeffrey: Mikayla, Jim, (Semhar)

Sting7: Rick, John, (Mikayla)

David: I’m going to hope for the best and say that Jim and John will be our final two, with Mark as the potential third.

Who will win it all?

William: I have bad luck when I pick women, so I can’t pick Elyse. In hopes that the game is valued over challenges, I’m picking Jim to win. Now watch him get voted out first.

Ken: Ozzy.

Chris: Mikayla … especially if she decides to wear her lingerie football uniform to the final Tribal Council.

Jenn: Congratulations, Keith. Make me proud.

Jeffrey: Jim.

Sting7: Rick.

David: I’d really like it to be John. But Survivor strategists like him seems to have a knack for not quite making it. With that in mind, I have to go with Jim instead.

Conclusion

For the first time in a while, we have three RNO writers predicting the same winner – Jim! He seems at first like an unlikely choice, but maybe he’ll do us proud. Only one writer picked previous player Ozzy – and nobody picked Coach (probably not surprising there). Which writer will do the best with his/her predictions? Find out each week as we track them all along the way right here at Reality News Online!

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