The Amazing Race 20, Episode 4: “The Amazing Race Is Supposed to Be Fun and Good”

Previously on Basically, Dave & Rachel B. Just Drove Around Paraguay Last Week, nine teams traveled from Buenos Aires to Asuncion. Rachel B. & Dave were bested by watermelons and used their Express Pass to skip the Detour. Art & J.J. won the leg. Ralph & Vanessa barely beat Elliot & Andrew to the mat, sending the twins home. Eight teams are left.

Phil greets us from a famous statue that didn’t factor into the last leg. Then Art & J.J. are sent to Turin, Italy. There, they’ll drive themselves to the Lingotto Building in a product-placed car. J.J. gives an arrogant interview that kind of makes me hope he’s taken down soon. The guys find out that the earliest flight they can take leaves the next morning at 9:15 and lands at 10:35 a.m.

It’s just about 10 p.m. now, as Rachel R. & Brendon (Radon) leave. Danny & Joey leave next, talking about how hot Italian girls are. Mark & Bopper are happy to go “somewhere tropical.” Mark tells us his daughter has to take seven different types of medication, and he’s in the race to help better her health. Don’t jinx yourself, Mark! Nary & Jamie leave the mat and decide to go to a travel agency.

As Mark & Bopper ogle some local women, Dave & Rachel B. leave, then Kerri & Stacy. The teams all head to a travel agency except Mark & Bopper, who go straight to the airport. They meet up with Art & J.J., who tell them to go to a travel agency. Art tells us that Bopper & Mark are great, and he’s sure they’ll repay the favor in the future.

Ralph & Vanessa are last to leave, but it’s only 12:15 a.m., so Mark & Bopper should have plenty of time to get tickets. Theoretically. Vanessa & Ralph tell us the previous leg was the worst day of their life. They go to the travel agency, where Vanessa makes fun of Rachel R.’s sparkly shorts. Yeah, she needs to tone down the sparkly stuff. Vanessa & Ralph get on the same flight as everyone else, assured that this is the fastest flight. Mark & Bopper get tickets for a flight that lands at 11:50 a.m. Ruh-roh!

The teams all reunite at the airport. Joey (I’m 99 percent sure that’s Joey. Okay, 98) asks to see Mark & Bopper’s tickets and informs them that they don’t leave until 10:30, almost the same time the first flight lands in Turin. They run to get standby seats on the earlier flight. They’re unsuccessful, so they’re now an hour and 15 minutes behind all the other teams.

Those teams land in Turin and start driving toward the Lingotto Building. Brendon cuts off some people and Rachel R. says she knows now why Italians hate Americans – we’re idiots. So many jokes, so little time. Joey & Danny are still talking about Italian women. Dave & Rachel B. are bickering, and she gets so fed up with his backseat driving that she stops the car so they can switch places. Kerri & Stacy also switch because Kerri’s having trouble with the car.

After all the bickering and time loss, Radon and J.J. & Art are the first to reach the Lingotto Building. Ralph asks Joey & Danny for a five-minute head start to run up to the top of the building, since he has to deal with Vanessa. Ouch. Those four teams plus Nary & Jamie jog up to the roof, where Art & J.J., the first team there, find a Fast Forward. The first team to land a helicopter on the roof gets to skip the rest of the leg and go straight to the Pit Stop. Don’t worry, the helicopter is a model.

J.J. & Art head off for the Fast Forward, so Radon move on to the Roadblock. One of them has to rappel 120 feet down the inside of the building’s spiral section, grabbing a clue on the way. The Roadblocker has two minutes to complete the task. Rachel R., Danny, Jamie, and Vanessa take the task.

Art & J.J. are disappointed that Art will be flying a toy helicopter while J.J. wears a helmet holding a model of the building. Yeah, it’s a tiny bit lame. Rachel R. rappels while Brendon yells encouragement at her in the form of several uses of the word “baby.” Danny keeps talking about his wedgie. Radon are off to the Museo Nazionale Dell’Automobile. I don’t think you have to speak Italian to get what that means. Part of this drive involves showing off a feature of the product-placed car. Oy. Danny & Joey are right on Radon’s tail.

Kerri & Stacy are still driving, and Kerri’s trying to keep it cute, or something, but I think Stacy wants to slap her. Meanwhile, Mark & Bopper are now in Italy. Mark says the only Italian he knows is “Italy.” A for effort, Mark. Rachel B. & Dave reach the Roadblock, though he really wants to do the Fast Forward, since he’s a helicopter pilot. Rachel B. makes two very good points: A) There are many teams ahead of them, so their chances of getting the Fast Forward are slim; and B) It might not be a real helicopter. Thank you, Rachel B.