New Game Show Is Torture

A woman screams as flames erupt around her, "My legs are burning!" she yells. A young handsome man feigns concern, "Are you all right? Do you want to stop?"

"No, but it's so hot and they are shocking my back, it hurts!"

This woman is being tortured. Hurricane-force winds are being blown into her face. The chair she sits in is surrounded by fire and the temperature gradually climbs to 150 degrees. Sweat pours off her body as tiny vibrating electric shocks poke her back. She is spun upside down as a bodiless voice tosses questions at her: American or Not? Pamela Anderson.

"Not!" The woman screams. She is being monitored by doctors who take her oxygen level, heart rate, and blood pressure and come up with a combined quotient that they monitor to keep her alive and alert. They call this the Caution Zone.

This is not some Taliban torture method inflicted on an American bible salesperson. This is Fox's newest and perhaps sickest "game show," The Chamber. Apparently Fox hopes to appeal to all those Marquis, de Sade followers in the 18-49 audience group.

While the Fox website says The Chamber will open with a special preview on Sunday, January 20, followed by the official premiere on Friday, January 25 (8/7 Central), the show aired this past Monday -- at least in some areas (it's difficult to be certain about all areas because if it was aired, it was not in the TV listings for those cities). Lucky for me, I got to see it.

The show opens with two contestants standing within 12 inches of each other, invading the other's personal space and breathing in garlic from the other contestant’s spaghetti lunch. The host, Rick Swartz, asks a fairly simple question straight out of the book of lists: Name the eight countries that start with I, the top ten boys names of 2001, top ten women's magazines. The answers volley back and forth and the first one that misses gives the other contestant an opportunity to steal and gain a point. The first contestant with two points gets the privilege of being tortured in an amusement park ride that looks like it's as cheap as the tilt-a-whirl found in any given Wal-Mart parking lot during the summer months.

The contestant strips from an unbecoming janitorial uniform into his or her underwear before being forced to sign a waiver saying they won't sue Fox if they happen to catch fire and roast like a marshmallow. They are then strapped into the chamber and the real game begins.

Other scenarios include freezing temperatures, rain and ice storms, earthquake vibrations up to nine on the Richter scale. Add this to the fact that the head microphone and ear pieces tend to fall off when the contestants turn upside down. This creates situations such as when a contestant actually screams the right answer twice but does not hear the voice tell her it's correct, and so switches to an incorrect answer and loses – causing the show becomes even more controversial.

Losing is not easy to do, however. On this game you have to answer two questions in a row incorreclty so that you only have to answer every other question through the series of Levels – eight all together, lasting about one or two minutes as they crank up the torture.

Each question wins $1000, but if you complete all the questions you get more money. If you lose or tell them to stop, your winnings are cut in half.

The question remains, Will this show be popular. Yes, probably in the first few weeks as word of mouth gets around and people tune in to watch it like they watch accidents along the side of the highway. But does it have any staying power? I sure hope not. That would mean that Americans are even sicker than I thought, and I think they are pretty sick to begin with.

Watching someone being tortured for pennies is not necessarily painful, but simply boring. Most of the contestants in Monday’s game got nearly to the two-minute mark, so we got to see just about everything the show had to throw at them; and it might be remarkable to experience but it's like watching someone on a roller coaster. Which brings me to a really novel thought – Fox should take people around the country and ask them silly trivia questions at the local Six Flags. Let’s see how people answer questions hanging upside down going 60 miles per hour on the Ninja.

It's not much different from what they are doing now, but at least everyone who's ridden a roller coaster could empathize – and it would be less painful and perhaps even enjoyable. Personally I don't know anyone who has been through an earthquake, hurricane, fire, received electric shock, been hung out to soak in a below-freezing rainstorm, and been turned upside-down (unless you include Demi Moore in The Seventh Sign, but that doesn't really count.)

All in all, this show makes Anne Robinson's torture on The Weakest Link look downright sweet. What makes this show even worse is that it is a Dick Clark Production. Dick Clark has been known to cause pain to viewers, but never before has it been intentional.

Check it out for yourself and then go throw spitballs at people walking on the lower level of the local mall. I guarantee it will be more exciting than this show.

Peggy Keller is Mother and Behavior Therapist to her two autistic sons and teenage daughter.

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