UK Survivor 2: Who's Who

Well we finally head out to Bocas del Toro for the start of the second UK season of Survivor. The twelve contestants’ identities have been kept under close wraps up until now, but based on pre-arrival profiles and initial impressions, we can now predict their potential chances of success.

The Guys

Alastair, 34, oil company director from Scotland. Ex-air force serviceman and has represented his country in rugby and swimming. Looks a strong contender both physically and psychologically. Contestants with such attributes need to be wary of appearing too intimidatory to the others, as this can get them voted off quickly (as was the case with Nick in season 1) but if Alastair manages to avoid this, likely to do well. Survivor rating 9.

David, 55, retired fire-fighter from Newcastle. Like most of the inhabitants of the bonnie city on the River Tyne, David is fanatically devoted to the local soccer team, in his own words, more so than to his wife (wife is sure to feel flattered). Unfortunately the island tribal colours are red or blue, so he will not be able to wear their black and white striped shirt, an essential Newcastle fashion item. Shares the down to earth and amiable qualities of the city’s locals, which should help take him into the latter stages, despite his age disadvantage, as was the case with Mick last year. Survivor rating 7.

John, 32, ex-Marine now working in law. Has the military background to get through island hardships, though he admits that he doesn’t always take things seriously, which may or may not be a handicap depending on how he bonds with the rest of his tribe. Appears to be a decent, astute and very fit guy and, with the same proviso as Alastair, a strong contender. Survivor rating 9.

Jonny, 30, detective from Edinburgh. The Scots have been under-represented (more accurately, zero-represented) on UK reality shows recently, but the Welsh and Irish competitors in Survivor 1 and Big Brother have always done well, so do not write off the Celtic (as in the ethnic group, not the soccer team) influence here. Jonny has already stated that he intends to be scrupulously honest, which may be a bad tactic, unless this statement is a complete lie in itself. Looks a key player though Survivor rating 8.

Lee, 25, car sales manager from Essex. This is beautiful. The county of Essex (which is roughly to London what New Jersey is to NYC) is the victim of more clichés than possibly any other part of the UK and one of them is that most of the guys there are car salesmen. Lee also possesses other fashion accessories associated with the area; a tattoo and a Yankees cap (though, like most other Brits who wear such headwear, he has probably never seen a game of baseball in his life, let alone knows the names of any of the team). Has admitted to impatience, particularly when hungry, which will not endear him to the tribe at all. Survivor rating 5.

Tayfun, 27, professional Latin-American dancer (this will be a really useful skill on the island). Started badly by being busted for smuggling illicit contraband before even getting on the boat. Has said that he will laugh if he is the first person voted off. Well don’t hold back, as I suspect elimination isn’t far away. Survivor rating 4.

The Girls

Bridget, 43, a shepherdess (cool!) and mother of two. Has useful rural practical skills including food catching and latrine digging (but does she put the seat down?). Her ambition is just to win one reward challenge. Seems a fun person but very capable and could be a dark horse (or even sheep). Survivor rating 8.

Drew, 27, fire-fighter (sorry Susan, she is definitely female!) and ex-cop. She is one of only four female fire-fighters in her county’s force, so she is used to battling against the odds. Unfortunately started badly by being sick on the boat and is dreading the hunger and exhaustion. Survivor rating 6.

Helen, 22, hotel worker from Sheffield. If she won the £1million prize, she has promised to build her mother a conservatory, and buy the house next door for her and her sister, aaah, bless. A lovely, nice, Yorkshire lass. Unfortunately being nice doesn’t win Survivor. Survivor rating 5.

Meeta, 34, financial manager. Has a fluffy pussycat. Doesn’t want to turn into a complete bitch, but has promised to play mean if need be. Apart from that, there’s not much that’s obvious to say about her, which may help her chances if she blends into the background. Survivor rating 6.

Sarah, 22, financial trader in the City of London. Now here we go. The tabloid press has heavily featured photographs of Sarah posing in her bikini. According to their profile, she openly admits that she will use her tall, blonde, and slim attributes to try and give her a sexual advantage. Her pre-castaway fitness programme consisted of lying on a sunbed to develop a tan. She is arguably to Survivor what Anna Kournikova is to tennis. Inaccurate comparisons to the sexual wiles of last year’s winner, Charlotte, have already been made. However, while the latter did undoubtedly use her personal attributes to help her (particularly with Adrian), she also pulled her weight in the physical side and (compared to some of the other competitors) was a good team player. Sarah will find that flaunting her lithe, tanned body will not be enough and that tactic certainly will not endear her to the other women, at least. Though I can guarantee lots of press interviews (and more bikini photographs) when she is booted off the island. Oh, she’s also an Essex girl (see Lee above, but I think we’ve had more than enough Essex clichés for one article). Survivor rating 4. Potential post-Survivor television/modelling career rating 9.

Susannah, 27, teacher. Admits to appearing stuck up and aloof and hopes that this will not create a bad first impression. Apart from that, like Meeta, a fairly innocuous player, which may or may not help her. Survivor rating 6.

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