Biggest Loser 5: Couples, Episode 14 – Way Up There, Down Under

Last time: Dan played nursemaid to a piece of cake, though his shortcomings provided Roger the opportunity for some fun at Dan’s expense. Another pick-on-the-girls challenge left Jay with a nice hunk of cash, but he traded it in for a one-pound pass it turned out he didn’t actually need. Although the men were confident to the point of cockiness, Mark and Dan fell below the yellow line, and once-a-boy-and-now-a-man Dan was eliminated.

Following is a list of the players still remaining in the game. Bob trains the first three, and the last two are Jillian’s charges.

• Roger, seemingly unstoppable for the big win
• Jay, shaken by recent close calls at weigh-ins
• Mark, an emotional wreck getting close to his goal weight
• Alison, also running out of “extra” pounds to shed
• Kelly, seafood aficionado

This week’s action begins right after the last elimination ceremony. Series host tells the remaining competitors they have lost 487 pounds and eliminated 15 other players. She segues abruptly to say that the show is an international hit, and tomorrow, and after feeding them some statistical facts, tells the players that everyone’s going to Sydney, Australia! Everyone’s excited by the prospects of traveling to Australia.

Here’s a little background from my personal knowledge of Biggest Loser Australia. It’s very popular Down Under. Season 3 is well underway, with segments airing six days a week (goofing off only on Saturdays). Additionally, Bob and Jillian have been trainers in some or all of each season.

Ali, Roger, and Kelly take a break from packing to talk in the girls’ room. With Mark speaking for his absent brother Jay, they agree to make a secret alliance to vote out Roger. Mark has no problem with the decision to dump his “Pride!” buddy.

As they pack for the trip, Roger expresses his fear of kangaroos, while Kelly admits she’s barely been out of Florida. Mark thinks this is going to be fun, but intends to get his workouts in and follow a meal plan.

At the airport as they wait for the plane, Mark distributes snack packages he made up for everyone, each with 100 calories. Nice!

The next scene is arrival is Australia, accompanied by music that’s probably supposed to sound more like the intro to native sons AC/DC’s “Thunderstuck” than it does. Alison meets up with the trainers first and they welcome her to what Bob refers to as “my second home.’

In a cameo, Bob says, “What better continent to go to than Australia, the second-most overweight continent in the world? Do you know what number one is? The US of A!” Those of us in the other twenty or so countries of North America are all discouraged at his ignorance of what continents actually are.

The trainers don’t know how the last elimination ended up, as they were not even present at the weigh-in. When Alison tells them the remaining contestants have lost 97 pounds per person, Jillian shakes her head and jokes in mock-disappoint, “It’s not a hundred pounds per person.” Alison laughs. In a cameo, Jillian tells us she’s proud how hard the players are working.

As the contestants march up, the trainers see Dan is missing. Jillian feels sorry for Bob, because she knows they had a special bond. On the other hand, Kelly is happy to see the trainers, because she was worried about not getting her proper workouts in.

Alison tells those assembled that they are about to observe a traditional Australian ceremony. She calls for “Uncle Max.” No, Uncle Max is not a relative of Alison’s; he’s an aborigine, followed by a tribe mate playing a didgeridoo. Both are in traditional garb and body paint. Alison tells us that they will participate in a traditional “smoking ceremony.” There are no details on what’s in that smoke, but it’s supposed to bring luck. Ali is especially moved, and individually thanks Uncle for allowing her to participate in the ceremony.

The next scene is at the house used in the Aussie version of the show. Jay is jealous that this mansion is better appointed than the ranch they are used to. However, when the trainers get them into the gym, it feels very similar to them. Kelly feels the workouts are hard because they lost a training day to traveling and Jillian’s determined to make up for lost time.

Ali is working hard and perspiring heavily. Apparently the gym is not air conditioned, and Jillian asks her if she has her sports bra on and wants to take off her shirt. Ali is having none of that, because she sees many areas in the mirror that need work. Of course this is nonsense; all of her, including her arms, looks good. She obviously has some self-image issues. Calling Jillian’s mom!

As they prepare to go out to dinner, Ali inexplicably has selected a sleeveless dress. However, she expresses further concern over how her arms look to roommate Kelly. Kelly doesn’t understand why Ali is worried about her arms either. I bet in high school Ali was one of those kids who told everyone that she failed a test, then ended up getting 93%.

Mark promises his brother, “I’m going to cut a mean-ass rug tonight. I’m going to look stupid doing it, but I don’t care.” That’s the spirit!

The trainers are taking the five out to dinner tonight. It’s also an instructional event, to show them how to order nutritiously. After dinner, they go dancing. It seems like everyone has fun, but let’s move along.

The next day, the trainers take their charges on a tour of a local market. There’s lots of organic and other fresh food, plus great seafood. The trainers advise that shopping locally and cooking yourself is a good way to avoid hotel food and control what you’re eating. Well, a lot of standard hotels frown on cooking in the rooms and get cranky when the fire alarms go off.

In one funny scene, Jillian and Kelly butt heads over eating an oyster. Kelly doesn’t want any part of it, but Jillian always gets her way. Sure enough, Jillian makes her do it… and Kelly does not enjoy the experience at all.