Good Night Nurse, or “Isn't it Ironic?"

When I got online after Thursday night's installment, one of my online friends wasted no time in telling me she had a title for my next article. This particular friend is very witty and creative in her own right, and as such, suggested the "Good Night Nurse" you see in the title. Toni, wherever you are, I owe you one! Next time I win immunity, I'm passing it on to you, whether I need it or not.

Truthfully, however, the latest installment of Survivor: Marquesas seemed to be about irony. In fact, Alanis Morrissette's song "Ironic" might have served as appropriate background music. Let's just take a look at some of the ironies:

First of all, the show has had three previous editions, yet it appears as if Kathy didn't watch ANY of them. When she started talking about how the game had no place for lying, I could just picture Stacey Stillman, and for that matter, America, rolling their eyes. As she has done throughout her stay on the island, the real estate agent tried to dictate to the others how the game should be played. Kathy, didn't you know what you were getting into when you signed up?

The next irony is, by winning her second straight challenge, Kathy may have set herself up as a bigger target than the original Rotus ever made her out to be. True, she got no votes this week. But will she even sniff the final four?

There was also irony to be found in two of her statements regarding underwater adventure she won: First of all, her comment that it was good to get away from the stress of the game. Uh, Kathy, did it ever occur to you that the game wouldn't be as stressful if you didn't let Rob feed you a line you couldn't refuse? That maybe it was less stressful because you didn't feel the need to have things your way around the others? Kathy also said it was good to get away from the drama of the game. Um, guess who's created some of that drama? It isn't all just Rob and Sean.

Now on to Sean. Quite frankly, his race-rantings have become rather tiresome, not that they were all that great to begin with. Could he have made a more ironic statement than, "I didn't come here to vacation, I came to bring home the bacon?" Maybe that's true, but he certainly didn't come to help cook that bacon or even kill the pig in the first place. He stated that he didn't come here for a vacation, yet he started invoking Roots when asked to carry his share of the load. And of course, how ironic is it that several in his tribe mentioned his flatulence, when what really stinks is his attitude?

Now for a look at Vecepia. Last week, she was shown giving John a kiss. This week, she helped to kiss him off! And despite her numerous shifts in voting strategy, she has yet to have anyone cast a vote against her, or for that matter, come across as wishy-washy or backstabbing.

And of course, there's John. A couple of weeks back, he arrogantly told the cameras that everyone knew he was running the show. He also stated that there was a plan, and it was HIS idea. Maybe these bold proclamations led to his ouster. Granted he said these things to the camera, but when you're that full of yourself, it's awfully hard to hide it. Could his own bravado helped bring about his downfall?

Okay, here's a look at Robert, aka "The General." Yep, irony again. A few weeks into the show, the tatooed one accidentally sliced his foot open. This week, he and the other original Rotus may have shot themselves in the foot by their immunity strategy. And this time, John isn't around to patch up the resulting wounds.

And Tammy doesn't escape the irony watch either. After John got ousted, I never saw such a defeated look on the face of someone who had just won immunity. Maybe the crime reporter realized her actions during the immunity challenge could get her sentenced to jury duty on a charge of stupidity.

What about Zoe? Is the lobster lady really as quiet as a clam? Or is that what Mark Burnett wants us to believe? For someone who earns her keep on the water, she has been relatively quiet, as least as far as we've seen. Notice how during and after her "clear the air" talk with Kathy, we saw several confessionals from the latter, but not one word from Zoe? Does she even GO to confessional? My guess is she does, but for whatever reason, Marky-Mark chooses not to let us see both sides of the story.

And let us not forget Paschal. Ironically, I commented during the roundtable that he seemed to have left the robe and gavel at home. But in confessional this week, he said he felt he was fair in the courtroom and in the game. And what about Neleh? Well, in the previews for next week, she's shown saying, "We beat them at their own game." Ironic enough for ya?

Which brings us to our final two observations. First, the original Rotu four may have been done in not by anything Rob or Sean said, but by their own actions during immunity. Yes, they worked together during the challenge, but did that HAVE to make it that obvious? Tammy may really need that immunity in the coming weeks.

And now, ladies and gentlemen, I hold the last bit of irony. Last week, Rob got an abundance of camera time, followed by an abundance of votes. This week, it was Kathy who seemed to be doing the lion's share of the talking, yet it was John who got the axe. Guess Mark Burnett isn't as predictable as I thought.

Oh, I almost forgot: How ironic that Kathy fed her tribemates a Snicker's bar in an attempt to curtail their own "snickers" when she wasn’t not looking.

Ken Kellam lives in Dallas, Texas, in a condo he has recently started sharing with Luke, an Orange Tabby. Luke has filed for adoption.

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