The Amazing Race 3, Episode 4: The Not-So-Fine Print

From last time:
Derek and Drew, the Wonder Twins, 1st
Gerard and Ken, 2nd
Flo and Zach, 3rd
Arianne and Aaron, Team AA/Eveready 4th
Heather and Eve, the Legal Eagles 5th
Michael and Kathy, 6th
John Vito and Jill, Team JJ, 7th
Andre and Damon, 8th
Teri and Ian, 9th

Derek and Drew, the "Wonder Twins," depart from the pitstop at 10:56pm. This time the red shirt twin reads the clue contained in the envelope, but there is no close-up on the ring. Therefore for this recap, I haven't a clue which twin is which. I can assume it's the married twin in red, but how many people reading this know identical twins who changed clothes to stymie teachers in school?

The next route info envelope says, "Proceed to Stonehaven Harbor." They have to look for a message in a bottle. Phil does a voiceover and says teams must now walk over a mile and a half, where they will find their next clue.

All I can tell you is it's the middle of the night, and these people are walking without a care in the world. How many places left in the world can you take a constitutional at night without getting mugged? Lucky people who live in Stonehaven. One twin stays to another twin, "It says WALK. You can't go any other way." Please keep this in mind folks. Close-up of the twins walking past the coolest white dog. They ask a local for directions. The twins comment, "There isn't a whole lot of love towards us at this stage of the game." They add that they have an alliance of sorts with the other brothers, Ken and Gerard.

Which dovetails nicely to those brothers leaving the pitstop two minutes later at 10:58pm.Gerard confirms they have an alliance of sorts with the Wonder Twins as well. The twins are sweet, and are waiting for Ken and Gerard, and the four of them start to jog towards Stonehaven. Jogging with 50-plus pounds of backpack on your back, these contestants must be in great shape. I envy them.

Flo and Zach leave at 10:59. They have problems finding their way out of the castle. They are having a small spat as they leave, but Zach says he's doing his best to accommodate Flo's needs and she vice versa. I wonder if he knows that Flo thinks he is marriage material, as she said in last week's show. Team AA leaves a minute later at 11pm. Aaron goes on his spiel about passing the twins.

Now let me break away from the recap for a moment. I have written about Amazing Race since the first season. I have never ever said a bad thing about any reality show contestant in any show I have recapped or done commentary on. I am going to for the first time. Aaron and Arianne, I am sure you are nice people when you are not racing. I am sure I could sit down and have a cup of coffee with you in the City and enjoy your company. But on this show, the Race has brought out every bad side you guys have. The more you whine about the Twins, the more likable the Twins gets. And the less likable you get. Then you whine about the brothers. You whine against every team. It gets old. I understand you are jealous of the twins, physically they are the strongest team. They are handsome men. But while they may have started off as questionable racers, they have evolved into strong competition. I have never heard any of the other teams in any of the previous races come down on any of the other teams the way you two are doing. It's not nice. Aaron, you are a school teacher. What kind example are you setting for your students? Like I said, I am sure you two are nice people, the race has warped you totally, and for that I feel sorry. I would think of the race as an adventure so many of us only dream about. You are one of the lucky ones who can participate. You are hurting your own race experience with your venom.

I'm sorry folks. I needed to say that. Back to the recap, and thanks for reading my rant. Heather and Eve, the Legal Eagles, leave a minute later 11:01. Heather comments the race invigorates her but it is having the opposite effect on Eve. Eve looks very tired. Eve says she's cried more on the Race than she has in her entire life, but she is happy to stay focused.

As everybody is walking, we see that Flo and Zach, Team AA, and Heather and Eve have made a baby alliance to find the first route marker together. The Twins see a sign for the harbor - it's 1 ½ miles to the right. Flo, walking with the other two teams shouts, "this is officially a twin hunt."

Michael and Kathy leave at 11:13. Two writers at this site have commented privately that the contestants always rip the envelope and throw away the top part. They just get chucked on the floor. Maybe Phil has a clause in his contract which says he has to sweep all envelope parts from the pitstop, but they do this in all the other places? Can't they just put it in their pockets? Must they litter all over the world? Back to Kathy. She states that she chooses her battles and "is trying not to get upset over every issue that comes up." He on the other hand, says "beware of the werewolf," and makes some growly noises. Arooh! Werewolves in Scotland…