Stop That! Your Mother is Watching: Mom's Perspective on Survivor: Thailand, Week 6

In the beginning, it's safe to assume that most of the Survivor Moms think their darling child has what it takes to bring home the money. Now it looks like the merge is coming up... let's check in with the "Moms" to see what they might be thinking at this point in the game:

Chuay Gahn Moms

Jan - A bat funeral? Oscar?? What in the HELL have you been eating? Dingleberries?? There's a room reserved for you at the Home when you get back - surely you won't mind all the snickering... they're nuts, too...

Clay - Aren't you the cleverest thing! I looove the way you took charge of that challenge! Way to show Helen that you're not as dumb as she thinks you are, you being from the South and all... Stop making faces at the poor crazy woman! You're going to need her soon...

Ted - You big doofus! You gonna float to the boat? They oughta climb on you and paddle! And what on earth is that stuff all over you? How long has it been since you washed??? GO. TAKE. YOUR. BATH. NOW!!

Brian - Did I not tell you to get a haircut before you left? This is a business trip, remember? You're starting to look like the snake that you are! Oh well... whatever it takes, I guess... show me the money!

Helen - You're hanging around with the wrong crowd! Your friends, Dumb and Dumber, are looking (?) for a boat. Dumber's starting to act like the Hamburglar. Your buddy, Granny Clampett, is conducting bat funerals. Even the cute one (I know I've seen him somewhere before...) is talking about eating bats! Should have run when I told you to!

Sook Jai Moms

Erin - A tumultuous three days? Were you there? Makes me wonder if you were talking about something else... you're gonna have to show up if you want Playboy to notice!

Penny - You're getting a little bossy out there! Just don't think you can bring that attitude back here! I'm in charge of this wedding!

Jake - You looked like a proud father at tribal council tonight! Sweet, but this ain't The Brady Bunch! (Wait til you see what's coming to you with the merge - they make these kids seem well adjusted... )

Ken - You finally took care of the big chicken... who knew you'd do it in such an honorable way? You ARE a hero - in more ways than one... but don't think I won't wash that foul mouth out with soap!

Robb - Well, you've cursed, played, and ate your way to a ticket home! Your Dad has missed you too, son... hurry home! We bought bananas for you! And, Ken... thanks! You're quite a guy...

Shii-Ann - My little she-devil - you've known the answer to that 21 puzzle since you were five! What happened? The noisy one falls victim to your horns... she who laughs last laughs best!

Diana is an obsessed reality TV fan who works in real estate banking. She lives in the Deep South with her husband of 29 years, who is secure in the knowledge that he runs a distant second to Survivor. She can be reached at dsnonny@hotmail.com.

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