Surviving the Amazon, Episode 3: Kung Fu Roger

We enter this third week of Survivor: The Amazon with several questions. Will JoAnna continue to be a self-righteous bitch? Will the women ever get a shelter? Will Daniel show up in this episode?

Well, the last question is answered right away when we see the men chopping and working because they need to fix some leaks in the shelter roof. Rob says he can't imagine the women have a shelter comparable to theirs. Heh, he doesn't know the half of it. Oh, wait, the women don't even have the half of it! He says maybe the women's shelter is more comfortable, but not as structurally sound. Nope, definitely not more comfortable.

Roger approaches Daniel to ask if he'll get water. Daniel says okay. Roger asks if he can handle it by himself. Uh, yeah. Roger is still standing there, so Daniel asks if he wants to come with. Roger says he'll do it himself and stalks off. Apparently Daniel was supposed to say, "Sir, yes sir!" and jump immediately to attention with a quick salute. Then he should have double-timed it down to get the water. How dare he not immediately do what Roger says?!

So Roger complains to the camera that he was "tempted to slap the kid around." Now that I would have liked to see. Because, Roger, I think he would have beaten the crap out of you. And he would have been justified to do it. Egotistical jerk.

Dan says Roger irritates him because he orders people around. They basically aren't talking and both know they will be voting for the other. Also, he smells bad.

Back to Roger, who tells Dave that he had it out with Daniel (so either he read a lot into the water thing or we missed something important) and almost gave him a kung fu chop. Ah, that Roger - he's so clever. Get it - Daniel is Asian? Kung fu chop? So last week he attacked homosexuals and this week he makes fun of Asians. What a guy!

Meanwhile Matthew tells Daniel not to get bummed out - people are still jockeying for position and the momentum is against Roger. As they talk, they switch back and forth from English to Mandarin, which both speak. In fact, that's how they first bonded - and it's handy for plotting! Matthew says Roger is not safe. Daniel likes Matthew because he's truthful.

Over in the women's camp, there are bugs everywhere. Ick. Jeanne says the tribe is pathetic, hygiene is lacking, nobody cleaned the pot and now there are wasps all over it. And there's a tarantula on the flour container. Of course, the flour itself is moldy. Yum!

Once again they are complaining that everybody is doing their own thing. Jeanne says five different things are going on. They had all talked and promised they'd have a meeting today to get some order. So she calls the meeting - she has to wake Shawna to get everybody together. She nominates Deena as the leader (she had strategized with JoAnna to get that idea since Deena can be hotheaded and might cause friction - um, she talked to JoAnna and came to the conclusion that Deena could be hotheaded? Hello?). Deena isn't thrilled because, well, who wants to be a target? But she agrees to delegate tasks. Heidi says they are a good group when they pull together for the challenges - it's the battle of the sexes and they are going to kick some butt.

So that must mean it's time for the Reward Challenge! It's basically a big game of "Go Fish." There are 35 matching pairs of various items. Each player has a box in front of them and each box has five items in it. One by one they ask someone else if they have an item. If they match, they get to keep it. The tribe with the most matches wins. And what do they win? Baskets of soap, shampoo, clippers, and the like.

We begin with JoAnna asking Dave if he has pumice. No. Daniel asks the really cute girl with the curly hair if she has soap. Yes, Shawna does have soap. He walks over to introduce himself.

Back and forth they go. The guys go up but then the women tie it up and pull ahead. Along the way, Rob asks Heidi if she has conditioner. No. Deena asks Rob if he has conditioner. Well, of course. (This happens several times.) Then Daniel makes the mistake of asking Heidi if she has conditioner. Nope, she still doesn't. Rob points out that he had already asked that. Whoops! Then Jeanne comes back and asks Daniel if he has conditioner. Yes, of course. Ouch. Later, Shawna asks Rob if he has conditioner, which of course he doesn't because it was taken. He points out that somebody already took it, and then jokes that Heidi doesn't have any either. Host Jeff Probst interrupts to ask Rob if that witty repartee usually works with the women. Um, well, no, Rob says it usually doesn't. But then Jenna says actually he should hear what the women say about him at camp. Whoa. Rob's heart stops.

Back to the game. The women need only one more item to make 18 matches, which is a majority of the 35 possible. Jeanne asks Dave if he has shampoo. Yes! The women win! Actually, this isn't too much of a surprise since last week's previews showed them all bathing and stuff, which kind of implied that they won the bathing items…