Being Jeff Probstovich - Survivor: The Amazon, Episode 3: Daniel My Brother, You Have More Votes Than Me

Probstovich: You said Matt was your friend, but the vote was 6-1 against you. That means Matt voted against you. With friends like that?

Daniel: Yes, but if you noticed, Matt was sitting downwind from Roger at Tribal tonight. He didn't backstab me, he caught the vapors.

Probstovich: OK, enough about your malodorous little nemesis. One other question before you go. I noticed quite a spring in your step at the Reward Challenge with the ladies. What was going on there?

Daniel: Shawna is in love with me. I could see that little twinkle in her eye when I went over to get the soap from her. She wants me.

Probstovich: Do you think you would have done better if you had been in the all-female tribe.

Daniel: Most definitely, Jeff.

Probstovich: But you'd probably have ended up doing all the work.

Daniel: Jeff, I would have been working it, if you know what I mean. And loving every minute of it.

Probstovich: Speaking of work, you were seen as lazy in your own tribe. Were you?

Daniel: Jeff, that's the Roger effect again. If Roger says I'm lazy then I probably am. But can I help it if the guy was a workaholic?

Probstovich: Don't you mean jerkaholic?

Daniel: That too. The guy didn't ask for things in a nice way.

Probstovich: Give me an example.

Daniel: Like he's always complaining about his sore back and his bunions. And he's like, "Daniel, massage my feet! Hey Daniel, come here and rub my back!" Barking out orders. Hey, if he asked nice, I would have gladly done those things, but he didn't.

Probstovich: So his reality seems to be that he's king of the tribe, and you're all his little pawns?

Daniel: Jeff, someone needs to stop payment on Roger's reality check.

Probstovich: Well, Daniel, thanks for the that. It's time to go.

Daniel: Tell Shawna I'll be waiting for her.

Probstovich: Yeah, sure ... (under my breath) ...in Loser's Lodge.

Daniel turned and walked into the jungle and out of the game for good. My fifteen minutes as Jeff were up, so it was time for me to go too.

I'll be back in time for another Tribal Council postgame interview next week. Who'll be voted out?

I'm being Jeff Probstovich.

Lawrence AG Green has been a die-hard fan of Survivor since Pagong started charbroiling island rats on Pulau Tiga. He works as a professional web developer for the company that allegedly hired Survivor: Africa winner Ethan Zohn and then subsequently let the erstwhile soccer star go before he ever started. Lawrence AG can be reached at boycaught@lagtime.com.

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