Surviving the Amazon, Episode 4: Glory, Glory, Hallelujah!

Shawna says she knows Jeanne and JoAnna will vote against her, and probably Christy too. But she might have been bumped from the alliance now as they aren't consulting her, so she will vote on her own. This may be the first time in Survivor that we have seen somebody working so hard to form alliances to vote herself out! Oh, and remember how Shawna was talking about how they had formed and alliance and would need to stick together, etc.? Yeah, well, we see how long that lasted.

Deena says she feels bad for Shawna but she doesn't need to be a whiny baby. She doesn't feel good to think about keeping her there, but it's got to be about the overall alliance. JoAnna is the most physical and has too much force and power - Deena needs her off now.

So the alliance decides to talk to Christy. Yes, even Jenna speaks to her. Christy says it's a bummer that Shawna feels so bad, but Heidi tells her they need to vote out JoAnna, which will help Christy secure her position. Christy says privately that she feels like a free little bird. They want JoAnna out because she annoys them, but she also does work and helps feed the tribe. So which direction should she go? Shawna wants out and if they don't vote for her, they're trapping her there.

Time for Tribal Council. Probst says it's been a tough three days and notes that both challenges they lost were based on survival skills. Heidi says they were all surprised to lose because they had their act together and were ready to kick butt.

Probst takes them back to the last time they were at Tribal Council and says they had all agreed they needed a leader. What happened with that? Heidi (group spokeswoman today) says they talked about it and Jeanne "elected" Deena and the rest agreed. (Apparently Heidi doesn't understand the difference between "nominating" and "electing." They probably don't teach that in P.E. or Cute Girl School.)

When Probst asks if certain people are doing more work than others, Jeanne assures him it's an even distribution. Um. Okay. That's not what it seems to be, but whatever. She goes on to explain that they are in a routine and people do what they're good at. So JoAnna, Christy, and herself hunt (fish) while the others prepare the food.

Probst asks JoAnna if she has taken on a mother role. Yeah, mother of all annoyances. Oh, wait, that's not what he meant. She says no, she's left that to Jeanne and Deena. Instead she provides spiritual and emotional stability, sings, and quotes. Stability? Is that what she calls lecturing and preaching to those who don't want to hear? Interesting choice of words.

Deena is asked if she, as leader, has to assess the tribe. Yes - she knows who is doing well and who isn't. So, who is? Christy. She never complains, is always Johnny-on-the-spot, etc. Wow. Quite a difference from throwing branches at her feet a few days ago. Anyway, Shawna is not well, she says (shocker).

With that, it's time to vote! Heidi unsurprisingly votes for JoAnna, saying she's a strong competitor and since Heidi has an alliance with the others, JoAnna needs to go. Jeanne votes for Shawna because she needs some TLC. JoAnna also votes for Shawna, but only because Shawna asked her to. Deena votes for JoAnna, saying she's incredibly strong physically, mentally, and spiritually - but that also means she's Deena's biggest competition.

Probst reveals the votes. Four for JoAnna, two for Shawna, one to remain hidden. JoAnna is gone. Jeanne is not a happy camper.

JoAnna may not be singing "glory hallelujah," but I know I heard it from around the country! Oh, wait, actually she does sing it in her final words, saying she was very strong and the others were intimidated, especially Deena. She hopes the others survive without her. Hallelujah! Glory! Amen! Etc.!

OK, I'm confused. I thought God was on her side. That's what she kept indicating. So why give Him glories and hallelujahs for not keeping her in the game? I guess He works in mysterious ways or something.

Getting back to the game, Probst says on the outside they seem to have it all together, but tonight's vote says otherwise (what did he expect - unanimity?). He also tells them to not get too comfortable because you never know what's next. Aha! A hint! See below for how it goes with the previews for next week.

As far as the votes, it turns out that Shawna voted for Christy. Huh? My guess is that she didn't want to vote for JoAnna as she wanted to LEAVE. But she also didn't want to vote against somebody in her own alliance. So that left pretty much just Christy, and she knew the vote would be a wasted one anyway. My confusion is in why Probst didn't show it just to up the tension a little and have Christy wondering who was still voting for her.

Next time - Shawna feels trapped. Poor thing. Nobody respects the fact that she's falling apart. And Dave and Jenna have a date. Dave even goes on about how there is a naked girl in a shower that he can look into - it's the greatest thing that's ever happened to him. Um. Looking at a naked girl in the shower is the greatest thing that's ever happened to him? What is this, a remake of Porky's? This guy seriously needs a life.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. We'll tackle that one next week. For now, join me in a rousing chorus of Glory Glory Hallelujah - JoAnna's torch has been snuffed!

David Bloomberg is the Editor of RealityNewsOnline and can be reached at rno@pobox.com.

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