Surviving the Amazon, Episode 9: Completely In Control

Jenna and Alex each have plenty of coffee and are buzzing on the caffeine. They return to camp and offer to take the first couple of fire watches 'cus they aren't going to sleep any time soon. Oh, and they also brought back enough cookies for two per person. They're a bit crumbled, but they're better than a half-sucked mint! Rob tries to convince the others that since Butch and Matt are out fishing and don't know about the cookies, those who are there should eat theirs. He says they're both on the outside anyway, so what are they gonna do about it?

Speaking of Matt and Butch on a boat, there they are, fishing. They say that it's been getting more difficult. They caught 12 fish the first day, six the second, and so far today - one. Ah, but then Butch catches one. He pulls in a piranha, knifes it twice in the head, and starts to gut it. As he's doing so, he makes the mistake of putting his finger near its mouth and with its dying breath, it takes a bite outta Butch. Ouch! Well, you knew somebody had to get bitten by one of those things.

That night, the fishermen return with good news and bad news. Good news: they caught some fish. Bad news: they're small. The others inform them that cookies (or, more accurately, cookie crumbs) await them. I guess Rob didn't win out in that discussion.

Then the real action starts. Although Deena had sworn everybody to secrecy about the whole "we'll vote out Alex if Matt wins immunity" thing, Heidi runs off with Jenna to spill the beans. Heidi says privately that she, Jenna, and Alex were in the original alliance, and she wouldn't stab them in the back. Um… Now wait a minute. It seems to me that she was in an alliance with Jenna and Deena long before Alex ever entered the picture… Anyway, she tells Jenna knowing full well that Jenna will tell Alex.

She does, and claims that Deena is stabbing them all in the back because she's pissed at them. Um… OK, I guess I missed that too. Deena isn't pissed - she's trying to play strategically. I have no idea where Jenna came up with that. But in any event, she says Deena is causing trouble and they have to figure out where Rob stands.

So Alex goes to Rob and asks what's going on. Rob is stunned and says that was just discussed earlier this afternoon - how does he know already?! Alex responds that he knows because he's good. In any event, he tells Rob the plan should now be to get rid of Matt and then Deena.

Rob privately says that things are getting interesting. It's Deena vs. Alex and both think they are calling the shots.

In other news, Heidi has apparently been bitten near her knee by a spider. Her leg won't bend. It's sore, black and blue, and she can't touch it without extreme pain. OK, then don't touch it. Rob describes it as having a knee the size of one of her breasts. Hopefully, she'll have it drained. (I'm presuming he means her knee, not her breast.)

The next day is treemail and it asks if they want food or immunity. I immediately think "gross food challenge," but the wording makes it questionable. In any event, Deena reiterates that the plan had been Matt first, but if Matt wins immunity, Alex is gone. Period. End of story. Written in stone. No chance of it being changed.

They arrive at the immunity challenge with Alex carrying Heidi. Host Jeff Probst asks what happened and she explains the spider bite. He points out that, so, in a physical challenge, she's in trouble. Yup. But it's not. It deals with food - but there's a catch. Isn't there always? Indeed, it is the gross food challenge. Or as Probst says, "delicacy." Yeah, right.

The challenge takes place in four rounds. Two people are dropped out for each of the first three rounds, and then the last two battle it out for immunity.

All eight line up with covered dishes in front of them. Probst says, "Take off your tops." Heidi and Jenna instinctively remove their shirts. Whoops! No, wait. That didn't actually happen. He means the tops of the dishes. Inside are big Amazonian grasshoppers. Yummy! And they're off! Jenna is nibbling at it. Christy is gagging. Matt is crunching it down. He finishes first. Deena is second. Alex third. Jenna officially gives up, saying she can't eat it. Rob is next, then Butch. Christy is still gagging while Heidi is chewing. Christy manages to get it down just in the nick of time to beat Heidi for the final position.

The second round is coconut worms. Matthew quickly downs them all, with Deena, Alex, and Christy right after.

Third round features five beetles, baked and crispy. Christy is back to gagging. She's making some great faces. Ooooh, now they're not so great. Matt finishes. Christy gives up and pukes. Deena gets 'em down. So it's Matt against Deena at the end.

The final round is a live beetle larva which Deena describes as "nasty ass." Probst says they took off the pincers so it wouldn't bite on the way down. What great guys! Probst tells 'em to go and Deena just steps back and points to Matt. He swallows it whole. Probst looks on in wonder and asks, "You didn't even kill it?!" Matt says he hopes his digestive juices will win the battle. Ick.

Now it's time for plotting as Tribal Council approaches. Deena takes Jenna aside to let her know about the plan to get rid of Alex. Deena says the mistake Alex made was to lose the immunity challenge. For her part, her ass would have had to be on the line to eat that grotesque thing - no way. Why do I hear echoes from Roger when she is speaking?