Survivor Psyche, Episode 10: (AL)Exed

"Two Sizes Too Small"

It gets worse. As soon as Heidi and Jenna get back to camp, they start sniping at Christy, who is sitting by herself reading her letter. "When she outbid Jenna, I was like…" Heidi hides her head in her hands in horror. "I was surprised that she did that, but not really - that's OK," Jenna shrugs graciously. Far be it for Queen Mayzie to let an Ugly Duckling like Christy ruffle her feathers.

Apparently, Jenna's posse has been going around maligning Christy for daring to outbid Jenna. Matt, who marches to his own drum, gallantly comes to Christy's defense. "My feeling is, Christy deserved the letter. I realize it would really elevate her spirits and I felt she deserved it. I felt Jenna was being selfish. - A person's a person, no matter how small!" Horton says staunchly.

Jenna gets the news she's been hoping for - the cancer treatments have shrunk her mother's tumor by 50%. Alex, Heidi, and Rob cluster around Jenna to show their support. Lovely, you say, and very touching to see how much Jenna loves her mom, and how much her buddies love her. And then … what? Do any of these tenderhearted feelings ever extend to someone, anyone, else? Does it ever occur to Jenna or her friends to wander over to the deaf girl crying under the tree to simply ask about her letter? Never do we see any instance of common courtesy from Jenna, let alone Heidi and Alex. Jenna's mask-like face hides a shrewish disposition, while her shriveled little Grinchy heart opens only so far and no further. It only responds to people who are clean and pretty and lavish lots and lots of hugs and kisses and sweet nothings on her.

Meanwhile, Christy-Lou Who, who would gladly forgive and forget and let a parade of Grinches sit at her feast, sits under her tree weeping as she reads a letter from a high school friend. "Knowing that there's people out there that love me is such a good feeling. Maybe I can't talk to anybody out here but I can definitely talk to people back home."

Hatching the Plot

While the other players are bogged down in their own mundane realities, Matthew's highly refined brain has experienced the stirrings of enlightenment. "Now is a critical time - there are a number of subgroups that have formed. One potential subgroup that has formed consists of Alex, Jenna, Heidi and then there is Rob." Matthew and Butch hunker down and brood over their plight. Matthew tells Butch that Rob must realize that he is just a wad of gum on the shoe of life to Alex. The plan is to get Christy to join the other Who's down in Whoville, otherwise they're all sitting ducks.

"No matter what happens,
"This egg must be tended!"

"A Wonderful Awful Idea!"

Like Lex in Survivor: Africa, A-Lex feels free to tell his vulnerable alliance member that he's going down. Alex oh so nonchalantly informs Rob that since Heidi and Jenna are tight, Rob will be the first to go when they reach the final four. On the surface, Alex and Lex are both easy-going fun guys, but who, when the situation presents itself, cheerfully throw their former allies into the nearest shark pit without a second's hesitation. "Hey Dude! It's nothing personal. I'm just being "honest" with you!"

What's this? A blatant threat to Rob's painstakingly plotted position in the game? It's a battle between self-preservation and social standing!

Rob had an idea!
"An awful idea!
"The Grinch got a wonderful, awful idea!"
"I know just what I'll do!"
"I'll plot, and I'll plan, and join with the Who's!"

When tree mail arrives, the tribe members scurry off with their very own, extra secret Cosmo quiz. The quiz asks each Jacare' to answer key questions pertaining to the others, and proves to be another eye-opener for Rob. "The questionnaire was more of a slam book type quiz. 'Who would you trust with your life' and a bunch of very interesting questions that really got me thinking about a number of things."

"100 Percent"

On Day Twenty Nine, in the Jungle of Nool,
"In the heat of the day, in the cool of the pool,
"He was splashing …enjoying the jungle's great joys …
"When Horton the elephant heard a small noise.
" "My friend, came the voice,
" "You're a very fine friend,
" "A friend such as you I will take to the end
" "But first there is something that we must discuss
" "I've decided to come clean to earn your trust
" "I was distracted by Heidi and Jenna and lust!"
" "I told you some lies to string you along,
" "I danced a fine dance and sang a fine song,
" "But finally I've come to an E-piphany,
" "I've come to see that it's Alex or me!"

Rob's heartfelt soliloquy is accompanied by handholding, tears, and outpourings of trust, honor, fraternity, and other manly bonding stuff. In contrast to Jenna, scheming Rob's Grinchy heart has grown three sizes today. "I give you my word, I appreciate your honesty. I will not betray you," Horton replies earnestly. "An elephant's faithful, one hundred percent!"

"I am very aware of the arrogance of my alliance. I think that it's gonna help me here and I don't think it's gonna be very difficult to sway the opinions of the three people that are in this alliance," Rob promises Matt in return.

Now it's Christy-Lou Who's turn to be charmed by the Cat.

I looked!
Then I saw him, talking to Matt.
I looked!
And I saw him!
The Cat in the Hat!
And he said to me,
"Why do you sit there all sad-faced like that?
"They think you're not pretty
"They think you're not cute
"But you work really hard,
"And you're honest, to boot
"I know some good games we can play
"Said the Cat
"I know some new tricks
"Said the Cat in the Hat
"A lot of good tricks
"I will show them to you
"And Alex will be voted off when I do!"

At first a disbelieving Christy can't process the news that Rob is choosing her to ally with over Alex. "Dude - I'm with you! I'm with you to get Alex out, just because I could care less about Alex!" (Gag) "He's always drooling over Jenna and Heidi." To the camera, Christy wonders if Rob is sincere or "just trying to stir up something."