Survivor Psyche, Episode 11: Silenced

Cry Me a River

It doesn’t take long after Jenna and Heidi get back to camp to crack open their junior edition of Big Jungle Misery Tales. “I heard the vote and I almost passed out! I felt betrayed more than I ever felt in MY LIFE!” Jenna wails. “Rob betrayed the alliance. He betrayed me and Heidi. He betrayed Alex. I can’t imagine how Alex felt … (Insert appropriate Care Bear emotion here.) We HATE him! Me and Heidi cannot ever forgive him!”

Rob dodges and weaves as he tries to deflect Heidi and Jenna’s verbal peltings. “Wait a minute here girls, Alex was trying to double-cross me, isn’t that right Matt?” is Rob’s ingenuous ploy. “I have experienced many instances when he has been deceptive,” Matt dutifully responds. Heidi arranges herself atop some moral high ground before telling the camera her version of the events. “If I would’ve talked at that point, I would’ve had every single cuss word come out of my mouth,” she huffs. (Seeing Heidi go off would be like watching an enraged gerbil attack its exercise wheel.)

The waterworks continue even after the others have gone to sleep that night. Heidi blubbers on and on to Rob about how it’s just not fair and how much she’s helped three of the guys, for cryin’ out loud, and it’s no way to treat a nice girl like her. “Butch wouldn’t even be here right now (if it wasn’t for me!). Sob! Rob interjects a little camp counselor wisdom between outbursts. “It’s time to evaluate what you’re willing to do to win this game.” But, Heidi’s lament is unchecked as Rob’s eyeballs roll helplessly in his head. “Jenna and Heidi were under the impression that they were in the majority and they were gonna ride this majority to the end. But now the tables are completely turned and it’s Jenna and Heidi who are gonna have to kiss some ass in the next few days to insure that one of them makes it at least three more,” he tells the camera gleefully.

A wet miserable dawn greets the remaining players when they get up the next morning. That’s assuming that they get up. Matt, Butch, Christy, and Rob scramble to erect a watertight new shelter while Jenna and Heidi remain in a sulk-induced stupor in the old one. “The shelter was not waterproof. Water was leaking through the roof. The roof wasn’t built correctly from the beginning and everyone was miserable,” Matthew tells us matter-of-factly. (What?! Master Builder Roger’s construction project was Not Up To Code! Someone inform the Building Commission!!) Super Renaissance Man Matthew effortlessly guides Rob, Butch, and Christy through the construction of the new fire shelter. No tantrums, no manipulative power plays for this guy … wait a minute – did you think we were talking about Grumblina and Poutalotta, here? They’re still sulking in the old shelter, hoping the other players notice and pay them some attention. “No way we’re throwing in the towel,” Jenna fumes. “We’ve done all we can do. Someone stabbed us in the back and eventually they’ll pay!”

Craftily, Heidi and Jenna wait for Christy to trudge by under a sodden load of palm fronds so they can pull her into their lair. Hyper Heidi begins her rapid-fire stealth campaign to win Christy over. “I’ve never lied to you,” she hisses. (Fifty bazillion viewers are screaming at their TV screens. “No – that would require you to actually SPEAK to Christy first – THEN you would have the opportunity to lie to her!!!”) “When we’re gone – you’re next!” Heidi threatens. In a desperate attempt to persuade Christy of the righteousness of their cause, Heidi searches the far reaches of her frontal lobe for her calculator. “We’ve got a chance to go either 1, 2, 3, or we’ve got a chance to make it to the top 3,” she says in her most authoritative “Sesame Street” voice.

Never the one to be outdone by a bunch of wannabe schemers, Rob takes Christy on a little walk down Liar’s Lane. In order to keep Christy malleable and trusting, Rob gives her the “wicked stepsister” version of events. “Jenna said she worked so much harder than you. Jenna said her tree was bigger than your tree.” It works like a charm. Gullible Christy swallows the bait and swears her fealty to Trickster Rob, while mocking her archenemies. “So now you need to talk to me. Maybe if you’d shown some responsibility and consideration throughout the whole game, it would be different.” Privately, Christy debates her standing in the game, and her potential to “kick butt.”

Reward Challenge: Catching Up

We almost witness a meltdown of titanic proportions this week, when Probst announces that the winner will get a “visit from home.” “Are you two all right?” he probes as Heidi and Jenna bawl in each other’s arms. Then it’s on to the challenge.

It’s another brawn then brains event this week. Since Matt is extra endowed with both, he easily:

Finds the hidden paddle

Rows the tippy boat to the puzzle buoy

Answers the question correctly to find the puzzle bag

Rows back without falling in

Assembles the snake puzzle correctly to win!

While Matthew sails on to victory, Jenna and Christy opt to swim to the puzzle buoys, while Rob decides to stick to his boat, even though he gets pitched into the water at the beginning. He finally catches up to Matt at the end, just as Matt is piecing together the stomach section of the Anaconda. Butch and Heidi watch supportively from the beach.

Probst sets up the next part of the event in moralistic fashion. “Is it better to give than to receive?” he asks Matt. Shrewd Don Matteo grasps what Probst is after. “Give!” he pipes up obediently, then offers to relinquish his reunion with his mom so the other players can meet their own loved ones. “Oh you don’t have to!” Jenna and Heidi wail as they pitch themselves into Matt’s manly arms.