Surviving the Amazon, Episode 12: Burning Down the House!

Day 36, and Butch is chopping wood. Jenna is lying around. So things are pretty much back to normal.

Jenna says she can't do this anymore. She feels like crap. She hates every minute being there. So many things are more important to her. Yadda yadda yadda. She can't even walk more than five steps. She's having chest pains. She's falling apart. Blah blah blah. The last thing she wanted to do on her last couple days was to be a big baby. Millions of people yell at their TV sets, "Why change now?"

Heidi says Jenna's physical state is not good. Phew - good thing she told us. I wasn't quite getting that message! Anyway, Heidi decides she wants to make sure that she has every chance of staying because of it. After all, turning on your friends is wrong. But using your friends' physical ailments to get them voted out, that's okay. In Heidi's world, anyway. Heidi continues by saying that having Jenna voted out definitely works to her advantage. Duh. 'Cus that means it's not you!

She campaigns for this result with Rob, but he doesn't appear to be taking the bait. Heidi claims to be concerned about Jenna's health. Rob says it's just one more day. Heidi counters that Jenna is concerned she won't even make it that one more day. Rob asks what she means by "not making it" - is she going to die? Well, no, but…

Privately, Rob says Jenna is whining and sick and those are two things you should generally avoid. If you're willing to put your head on the chopping block, he's willing to chop it off.

Time to sharpen the axes, because it's Tribal Council. The jury walks in and I realize that it's not just a jury, but a list of people who have been screwed by Rob. Dave - screwed by Rob. Deena - screwed by Rob. Alex - screwed by Rob. Christy - screwed by Rob. This guy is in serious trouble if he makes it to the final two.

For the jury's benefit, Probst has the final five narrate the previous three days. Butch says it was a total destruction fire - the whole camp was burned down. What we see on them now is what they have left. The jury can't believe what they're hearing. Probst asks Matthew how he suspects the fire started. Well, there was a lot of wood drying behind the fire. He figures the fire they left ignited the dry wood and then the fire shelter - and then everything else. Jury members are shaking their heads. They actually look quite upset.

Probst asks Butch if he feels responsible. Butch says initially he did, but there are so many variables that could have happened that he feels comfortable that it wasn't his fault. Ah, denial is a wonderful thing. Heidi, meanwhile, looks a bit skeptical. Or else she's trying to figure out what the word "variable" means.

Moving on to other topics, Jenna is asked how she's doing. She says she doesn't know what's going on. She has some sort of tonsillitis and can't recover because they aren't eating enough. It's hard. Continuing with her, Probst asks what the criteria would be to bring somebody to the final two if she had that choice. Jenna says everybody there knows it would be loyalty. She'd rather go up against somebody she cares about and who is a great player. She doesn't want to go up against somebody she knows she could beat because that's no competition. Oh please. You know what that's called? That's called $900,000 poorer and a Reality TV Hall of Shame Moment. For example, see a guy named Colby for more on that type of situation.

Moving on, Probst asks Heidi if she deserves to be this far along. Yes, definitely. She says she is the mastermind behind half of the plans that go on from day to day. The three guys are scared to death of her! Matt provides a great "huh?!" look as Rob gives a similar one. Dave, on the jury, obviously can't believe what he's hearing. I hope - I really really really hope - that she gave that speech because she knows she is going and wants to have some fun first. But based on her earlier statement at Tribal Council when she said she brought brains to the tribe, I can't really be too sure…

Matthew is asked what the basis for his vote tonight will be. He says it is allegiance to the alliance. How far does that allegiance go? Matt says if they are down to the final three, it's every man for himself. If Jenna needed another sign (which she shouldn't), that was it.

And so they vote. We see none of them, but we hear Rob's speech. He says something to the effect of, "Two girls, one brain, divide by two. Only one half-wit left." Ouch! But I had to laugh out loud at that one, especially after Heidi's inane speech.

Probst reads the votes. Rob, Heidi, Rob (with a smiley face), Heidi, Heidi. Big surprise - Heidi is gone. She leaves with a big smile and in her final words talks about what an awesome time and awesome adventure it was. She has a lot of heart, a lot of soul, and a lot of pride. (Um, pride? Most people with pride don't need to take off their clothes at the drop of some peanut butter and cookies…). She says she's Jenna's number one fan and without her, she'd never have made it this far. She's so excited to be part of the jury and will see Jenna in a couple days.

For that matter, we'll see them all in barely more than a couple days. On Sunday, this series of Survivor will wrap up with a two-hour finale followed by a one-hour reunion live in New York City. In the last three days they will face three Tribal Councils, two immunity challenges, and we will be left with one sole survivor.

As for me, I'll be right there in NYC - hoping it doesn't rain and that it warms up a bit from the current forecast. See ya there!

David Bloomberg is the Editor of RealityNewsOnline and can be reached at rno@pobox.com.

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