Reality Hit List, June 5: Welcome Back, The Amazing Race!

Speaking of resemblances, here’s Russell & Cindy next to The Captain and Tennille:

Uncanny, isn’t it?

Meanwhile, here’s Amanda on her relationship with Chris: "I’m oversensitive and he’s overcritical, and you get us together and it’s going to be difficult." Well, by all means choose him as your partner for a race that’s going to put you in some of the most stressful situations you’ll ever experience in your life, then. This episode alone, Amanda got bleeped seven times for saying the "F" word, and the bonus footage of the two of them having an argument on the cbs.com website makes The Osbournes look like The Sound of Music. For his part, Chris may have said, "Come on, Flo!" but somehow I can’t picture Zach ordering Flo to "move her ass," much to most viewers’ apparent dismay. If anything, Chris and Amanda seem like a younger Teri & Ian or a more functional Tara & Wil. If I’m getting Flo & Zach vibes from anyone, it’s Kelly & Jon. Between Kelly saying, "Jon has a calming effect on me. He just knows how to handle me," and then calling Jon an idiot when they were looking for their bus tickets, the dynamic (as we see it on the show, at least) just seems familiar somehow.

Chris & Amanda, Millie & Chuck, Steve & Josh, and Steve & Dave (and, according to the bonus footage on the cbs.com website, Jon & Al) formed an überalliance of sorts. When Josh finished the Detour, he was surprised to find Chris & Amanda and Millie & Chuck had stuck around: "I can’t believe they hung out and waited for us with the cabs!" Quite frankly, neither can I. I mean, there’s "nice," and then there’s "doormat." In the end, though, it didn’t hurt them any (this time at least, although they need to be less altruistic in the future) and they wound up in a three-way tie for first, which meant that three Hawaiian vacations needed to be doled out. That wailing sound you hear is the ambulance rushing the producers to the hospital after their coronaries.

Kudos to Steve & Dave for being supportive and hanging in there, most definitely, but their performance this leg doesn’t bode well for them in the long run. Still, Steve got in one of my favorite sound bites ever at the pitstop: "We have our strengths. We don’t know what they are yet..."

In the end, Debra & Steve were eliminated. They raised my suspicions in the beginning because generally people who feel compelled to point out, "We’re fun!" are anything but, but they did seem like a genuinely nice couple. Just, unfortunately, not fast enough to win the Race.

I’ve come to the conclusion that The Amazing Race is one of the best and definitely the classiest reality TV show on the air. It has the elimination aspect, but it’s through people’s own choices and actions (and sometimes good and bad luck), not backstabbing. In fact, while on a lot of reality shows it’s everyone for themselves, here teamwork is vital. It’s not sensationalistic, the suspense is absolutely nail-biting and sustained at a fever pitch for the entire episode, and teams almost always seem to walk away from the experience feeling good and with a better understanding of themselves. It’s great to have it back again!

Meanwhile, on the other end of the quality spectrum, there’s a show that seems to have been written by macro. One where just the thought of describing it as "classy" makes me laugh so hard I can’t breathe. Next up: For Love or Money!

Brian James is an actor/writer/singer in New York City. An avid reality show, Passions, early Ryan’s Hope, retro music, and Internet discussion board junkie, he can be found holding up "Will Snark For Food" signs in subway stations as he continues to search for that elusive "day job." Brian would like to stress that his writings are based solely on what he sees in each episode, and realizes that there may sometimes be more to the story and that people may behave quite differently under normal circumstances. Comments and cybertomatoes accepted at brianjamesrno@earthlink.net.

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