Paradise Hotel, July 9: Hell in Paradise

So later, Beau confronts Alex while Scott and Dave watch. He's upset about the lies. Well, Beau, you were also upset about the truth a few episodes ago, so I guess you just can't win. Alex asks Beau if he indeed said he didn't like guest Amanda. He confirms it. "Then what is the problem?" asks Alex, as he holds up his hands. He goes on to say he's going to continue to flirt with her. However, at the moment, it's Matt she's flirting with inside the swimming pool. Actually, it's not just flirting, as they hug and kiss each other.

Later Beau and Alex resume their fight, in front of guest Amanda again. Beau rants that he can't trust his good friend's word, since he says one thing, and does another. Alex responds by stating what is obvious to everybody else: Beau has feelings for guest Amanda that he doesn't want to admit. If Beau doesn't care, then whatever is between him and guest Amanda shouldn't be his business. Guest Amanda proceeds to tell them they are repeating their first argument, where Beau accused her of flirting with Alex just to piss him off. She starts to cry and says she doesn't know what to think about them anymore, and doesn't want to deal with it anymore. However, Beau is still angry, and tells Alex that "sorry only goes so far." Alex responds that anything he does with guest Amanda is between him and her, and the next time it bothers him, call him out on it. Beau says it won't bother him anymore, because while he thought he had a friend, he now knows that the friendship is nothing. However, he's still glad he got to know him. He then points at Alex, tells him he just said he didn't care, and stalks out.

The next day, host Amanda comes out to greet the guests. She asks the guests if they are wondering why she's at the resort, and then says they like to juice things up at Paradise Hotel. She tells them she's warned them that behind every corner at Paradise Hotel waits a surprise. Host Amanda asks guest Amanda to stand up for her. She does, and tells her she has a surprise for her. With that, her ex-boyfriend, Jason, comes out, wearing a black necklace like the person in the single room has. Guest Amanda's jaw drops, and she covers her face with her hands, then hugs him. Everybody else laughs, except Toni, who also covers her face with her hands. "Why are you here?" guest Amanda asks. "Thought you'd be happy to see me," says Jason. They hug each other tightly as the guests watch with stunned expressions on their faces. "I love you," says guest Amanda.

Host Amanda tells the guests that, as they've probably figured out, the new guy is Amanda's ex-boyfriend, Jason. He's going to be the guest visitor for the next 48 hours. She tells them to enjoy their time. Guest Amanda makes the introductions, and shows him around the resort. Flashback to the first Pandora's Box game, where guest Amanda revealed that she cheats on her boyfriends when they don't make her happy. Zack notes that there'll be sex on the show now, then tells Amy "Other than us." Scott asks Beau if he and guest Amanda are now officially divorced, which prompts a chuckle. The guys ask Matt if he kissed guest Amanda last night. He admits he kissed everybody, and flashbacks are shown of him and guest Amanda in bed together. Zack starts singing about how guest Amanda keeps kissing new guys, but now her boyfriend is back. Plus, if Jason doesn't know, Zack is going to tell him all about her kissing and flirting. Voiceovers from guest Amanda tells us that her and Jason went together for a year and a half, and they broke up after she moved, and they couldn't handle the long distance relationship. Back in her bedroom, Jason asks her if Beau is possessive of her. She admits they went from just meeting to living together, knowing that they had to, and there was a lot of pressure. Flashbacks are shown of their initial relationship, including how she thought her mom would find Beau adorable. She admits there is a lot of kissing going on, but says she's only kissed Beau. Cut to flashbacks of her kissing Alex, Matt, and Zack. Jason tells her he's not mad at her for that. They then start kissing each other.

Outside, Beau and Alex start conspiring. Beau says that if Jason approaches them and tries to act like he's the big guy coming to rescue his girlfriend, he'll spill his guts about how guest Amanda has been acting at the resort. He also notes that he's not her boyfriend anymore. Oh wow, Beau, you've now managed to take the final step to hypocrisy. Do you see yourself in that particular mirror yet? Alex agrees he'll do the same thing. Nothing like a "stupid bitch" to get between two friends, and nothing like another guy to bring them back together, huh guys?

Back in the Monkey Room, guest Amanda ponders leaving the hotel. Jason tells her that anybody can leave at any time. She asks if that's something he wants her to do. He responds by telling her that he'd like to have her. She repeats the question, and he finally says "Yeah."

So we close out the show with host Amanda pondering whether guest Amanda will check out, or stay to find out how summer in Paradise ends. We get the reminder that next week, a man will check out, and two girls will compete for the chance to join the cast of Paradise Hotel, plus the usual plug for the web site, paradiseonfox.com.

One final note: I've had the impression I'd seen new guest Matt somewhere before, and finally realized where. He's actually an astonishing physical likeness of how I've always pictured radio talk show host Phil Hendrie's character Chris Norton. All he needs is Zack's ego, the inability to pronounce the letter X, a "sessy" voice, and to start breathing hard every time he sees a woman to make the image complete.

So will guest Amanda leave Paradise with Jason? Will Dave keep continue to be publicly humiliated? Will anybody get to know the real Zack, or will he spend the summer in shallow relationships and having loose sex? What's the big prize at the end? Which man will check out? Which vixen will check in? Stay tuned!

Jeffrey Clinard lives in Las Vegas, Nevada, with his cats, Lam and Princess. He can be reached at jclinard@flashmail.com.

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