Big Brother 4, July 23: The Best Laid Plans of Morons…

Roddy, who regular readers of this site already know about because he talked to Paris Cosby about what he’s been up to, says he has been writing a lot, playing golf, and attending charity events. Big Brother was the biggest adventure, and he says it hopefully made him a better person. As for Chiara, she’s fantastic but they are just friends, he’s single. He says he sees Josh a lot, does that count?

Segue to Danielle, who is asked if she really thinks Roddy is the Devil. Pause. She notes, “oooh, big pause.” Heh. We never really get an answer, but she says she isn’t sorry she called him that. Roddy says nothing was personal, nobody meant it. (Personally, I always thought it was something of a compliment – that he was good at the game, but maybe that’s just me.)

After she got out of the house, Danielle got a call from a fitness place who saw her on the show leading the other HouseGuests in exercises. She is now doing her dream job as a personal fitness trainer. She agrees with what Jason said earlier about how close they are, and notes that she partnered with him in the house because she trusted him. She says she is happy that Lisa won, and that she was the third choice after herself and Jason.

Back to the present, it’s time to hear the final words of Erika and Michelle. Erika says it’s been a pleasure meeting most of them… pause… since she already knew one of them (and it wasn’t a pleasure anyway!). She had a great time. Michelle says she had the most amazing two weeks. It’s been a hard week but everybody made it so wonderful for her. She thanks them for making it so pleasurable. Er, maybe that last one should have been Amanda’s parting words from last week…

Time to see the final voting discussions, from David and Jack. David says Michelle’s mode of thinking is not along the lines of what she needs to be thinking in the house. She needs to be deceitful and conniving, but she’s too much of sweetheart. He adds that they need Erika to help get rid of Robert, Justin, and Jee, and he wants her on his side. He votes to evict Michelle. Wait! That can’t be possible! Jee and Robert said it would be unanimous! How could Dave possibly go against them?!

I’ll pause here to let you go get a Kleenex and wipe off all that sarcasm dripping from your screen. Back now? Good. Moving on.

Jack says Michelle doesn’t seem to be playing the game, she just does what they (presumably Jee/Robert/Justin) ask her to do. Erika is a strong member of the alliance, however. So he votes to evict Michelle.

So we know two votes each way, which we pretty much knew before the episode ever began. The question is how the others voted. Julie brings us back to the house and says that by a vote of 6-2, Michelle is evicted. Michelle looks shocked. Jee, Robert, and Justin all look even more shocked. We hear Jee saying things like, “Whoa,” and, “Oh boy.” People in my house hear me laughing and saying, “You are SO screwed, dude.” As Michelle and the others get up and move towards the door, nobody is really speaking other than the occasional expression of surprise from Jee/Robert/Justin. David apologizes to her, as do Jee and several others. Robert still can’t believe it. Personally, I continue to laugh. Maybe if Jee had listened to Dave and the others, this wouldn’t have happened. Instead, Dana would be gone. But no, Jee was absolutely sure of himself. And he was wrong. Moron.

As Michelle walks out, we check back in the house for more expressions of shock and dismay from the clueless threesome. Jee and Justin are just kind of standing around while Jun can’t help but smile. Dave sort of tiptoes out of the room with a smirk while Erika gets a drink of water. Jee whispers to Rob and Justin that the game is not over. Yeah, well, maybe not, but it sure got a lot more interesting.

Back to Julie and Michelle outside the house. Michelle says she’s doing okay; it was a huge surprise, but understandable. Julie asks why it was such a surprise – was it because they told her she was just a pawn? No, Julie, it was because aliens had come down and telepathically told her that she would be safe for another week. What an idiotic question. Michelle says everybody told her she was fine and definitely staying and no worries, so it kind of hurts her that they lied, but it’s just a game. Julie wonders if Michelle thinks they were lying from the get-go or the plan shifted? Since Michelle’s crystal ball is broken, and those aliens apparently didn’t share this information with her, she can only answer that she doesn’t know, she was out of the loop. Jee said she was 100% safe and had nothing worry about. Yeah, well, talk about out of the loop. Julie notes that as surprised as Michelle feels, she’s not as surprised as some of the guys in the house right now. Heh.

Moving on, Julie says that David, Michelle’s ex, said he had her back – which he did not; he was not one of two votes to keep her in the house. Does that surprise her? Yeah, it really does. She and David have a lot of history and she says she would have his back. She knows they have differences and fight like brother and sister (interesting – the same analogy made by her parents), but… Julie asks if this will affect their friendship when they get out of house. No, she could never do that. It’s just a game and he has to make decisions.