Big Brother 4, September 17: Bitches, Sluts, and Whores – The Celeb Filled Recap

Hey… do you remember what happened last week and the week before that and the week before that and remember when Tootie went to New York City to find the girls and her purse and coat were stolen and she almost got roped into doing prostitution on the streets of New York because this girl’s pimp wanted her as part of his harem? Well all of that except for the part about Alison being a good sport about things happened in the recap.

And speaking of recaps, must Julie Chen do one of her infamous pivots before we get another recap of what we just recapped? I’m picturing some wanna be Zach from A Chorus Line off in the corner going, “…and that connects with turn, turn, touch, down, back, step, pivot, step, walk, walk, walk. Right we’re going to do the whole combination facing away from the mirrors. A-five, six, seven, eight.”

Now, I would also go into viewer mail right now but pretty much no one disagreed that Alison’s nose is a bit screwed up when I mentioned it last time. What is on everyone’s mind though are the racial (if not racist) comments that Jun and Alison made regarding Robert, his Cuban heritage, and his daughter. For the record (or for those who for whatever reason can’t access the article linked), Jun threatened to destroy a white butterfly present that Robert had made for his daughter saying, “That bitch is never going to see it.” Even worse Jun, herself a minority and someone who we would think would know better than to do something like that, said, “His father should've stayed in Cuba. His family is like... No speaky English.” Alison, on her own accord, has repeated referred to Robert as “that Cuban faggot” and wanted to humiliate Robert on national TV by saying, “I vote to evict your sorry motherf---ing Cuban ass out.”

Shall we say Hall of Shame nomination here people? Anyone against it?

Finally, for the record, yesterday was my birthday and I kicked off the Farewell to My Twenties International Tour by going through the San Gennaro Festival in Little Italy last night and drinking more piña coladas and beer than I probably should have. But I did get to see Eldon from Murphy Brown and finally have real braciole instead of the garbage I made while trying to emulate Aunt Donna on The Family. Anyway, I watched the episode this morning with a nice hangover so some things may be a little fuzzy – even for me.

Anyway, we do have a recap to get to don’t we. This can’t be the Jun/Alison are truly bitches, sluts and whores recap… or can it???

(insert evil Brian laugh here)

So… we all know how Robert is pretty much on the chopping block since he lost both phases of the Head of Household competition. Of course we all remember Jun losing her shawl and absentmindedly taking her hands of her key (quite reminiscent of Jason last year fumbling for his hat and taking his hand off of his key for a brief moment) and then Jun soundly beating Robert in the second phase of the HoH competition. All that remains is to name the new Head of Household and take it from there so he can go on his merry way.

But first, we have to listen to the three people brag about themselves and why they are the competitor. To me this is just filler until Robert has to go have a nice talk with Julie Chen before he and the “Dream Team” reunite and solidify their votes. Personally, I think that the Dream Team also includes Dana at this point and they are a solid voting bloc. In fact, before we even get to the inevitable because unless one of the women obtained a second or third personality (or in some cases, a first personality) we’re pretty damn certain that Robert is going tonight, right? So let me just say it… I think Jun wins it in, at the very least, a 4-3 vote with the entire Dream Team voting for her. I would not be surprised if it was a 6-1 vote either with maybe Nathan being the lone vote for Alison.

Anyway, back to the bragging… in this very special Barbara Walters interview, we asked the final three people what it would took for them to get to them where they are today.

Jun says that she has to listen, hide her emotions, and be a strong competitor, but not too strong. Apparently she was referencing Jee with her last comments there but let’s just take a quick look at Jun not really hiding her emotions as she threatens to rip apart the gift that Robert made for his daughter! FOR HIS DAUGHTER, JUN! Someone please restrain me from jumping through my TV, going back in time, and throttling Jun for saying that about a sweet little girl that she has never met. Personally, I can’t wait for Jun to have kids and have someone say that so she can feel the pain and hurt that I’m sure Robert is going ot feel when he gets out of the house and starts to read what they have said.

Wow… am I on my soapbox today or what?

Alison says she owes her success to her ability to manipulate and adapt. Of course she doesn’t miss the fact that she flirted like a common whore as well which explains why Nathan took her off the block and wound up getting booted not too long after as well. Part of me just feels for Donnie wherever he is because this is supposed to be his girlfriend and she’s admitted to whoring around the Big Brother house just so she could win some money that she will probably blow on lip gloss and rhinoplasty. Sorry, but that nose is really bothering me still.