Big Brother 4, The Finale: The Lesser of Two Evils

It’s been nearly three months of heated competition, vicious betrayal, sad goodbyes, etc. So now we spend three hours reliving it. OK, not really, but sometimes it feels that way. First, we have the intro with everybody’s name added back in. Well, except Scott. Almost makes me feel a little bad for him. Almost.

Julie Chen is here for the last time this season. She says that since Rob’s departure, Alison and Jun have claimed ownership of the Big Brother house. This begs the question of “how these self-proclaimed ‘evil bitches’” made it so far. You know, it might have been worth everything just to hear Julie Chen say “evil bitches” on the air.

Cut to shortly after Rob left. Alison says he was a sexist pig. She says she doesn’t want to talk to the jury – they’re sore at her for things she had to do. Oh, pity poor Alison. Gag. She says they have to put back on their fake smiles. Jun privately says that since Alison used her tears, kissed various guys, and crawled into bed with them, it does not bode well for her or how she was raised. Me-ow! Alison says Jun attacked people while in the house and that might not sit well with the others. Me-ow back!

But when they weren’t saying nasty things about each other, Big Brother gave them some champagne to celebrate. They reassure each other that they knew they were going to be in the final two right from the beginning. Oh please. Jun says her best move in the game was allying with Alison. She knew the alliance would work out because they share the same kind of disdain for each other. Heh. To prove it, we see both calling each other evil bitches.

Alison says some feminists will appreciate them for staying together (yeah, sleeping your way to the top, faking tears, insulting people, etc. is appreciated by feminists everywhere). So we get to see more flashbacks of them making their way through the field to the top. Betrayals, flirting, crying, winning, crying, betrayals, the mime, evictions, crying, laughing.

Alison to Jun: If could do it all again, would you? Jun: Yeah, but I wouldn’t eat as much. Heh.

Now the good stuff starts. Julie says the seven evicted HouseGuests who will make up the jury have seen only the few events they were allowed to see in the sequester house (evictions, competitions, etc.). Now they come together to find out who the final juror is and debate the outcome.

Rob walks in. Dana says she is totally disappointed as she wanted him in final two. Well, sure – who would want Alison and Jun?! Justin says it sucks to have to choose between these two. Nathan says Alison totally manipulated him (yes, we know). Jee says she’ll talk her way out of anything and jump into any bed. Heh.

Dana says Alison got lucky. Jack says she’s not in the finals because she was lucky, but because she remembered that there are no rules about how to play this game. She used everything in book to win – Dana looks in the opposite direction as Jack goes on about this. Clearly, she doesn’t want any credit to be given to Alison.

Nathan says Jun is a snake. Erika says Jun launched too many personal attacks and Rob says he cannot forgive the evil things she says. She talked about everybody every day. Jee says she’s brutally honest. Um, Jee, there is honest and then there is nasty. She’s not honest – she’s just plain nasty. He also says she’s highly intelligent.

Erika chimes back in that Jun should not win this game because she let Alison do her dirty work for her. Dana says Jun sat back and laughed while the others went at each other. True in both cases, but those are also valid strategies. In fact, I fully expected Jack, Dana, and Nathan to make use of those strategies since they were the only ones in the house without an ex. Nathan even said he planned to sit back and let others fight it out! None of them did!

Justin says you have to ask if you can respect the way either played the game. That’s what he thinks is important.

Next we get our first glimpse of what members of jury are thinking as they prepare to cast their votes:

Jack is basing his vote on who he thinks played intelligent, savvy, wise game. (From his previous comments, this would seem to indicate that he’s voting for Alison.)

Rob says both did whatever they had to. But he’d rather vote for the turtles. Heh.

Justin says he has to vote for one of the two floaters and he doesn’t respect the way either played.

Nathan says he was backstabbed by Alison and did not have the best relationship with Jun.

Erika is trying to keep her personal feelings about them out of it.

For Jee, it’s all about strategy.

Dana says they both lied, both floated, and both did things she wouldn’t have done. Um. This is the same Dana who agreed to be in the Originals alliance and then floated on over to the Exes, lying in the process. It’s truly amazing how jury members become saints once they’re out of the house. Anyway, she says she’s voting for the lesser of two evils.

Now the jury gets to ask each of the finalists one last question before they vote. We see Alison and Jun sitting in the living room, fake smiles plastered on their faces and all.

Dana asks Alison why she thinks she should get Dana’s vote. Alison says it’s because of way she played the game. She put herself strategically in the best place she could be in, won competitions, and worked hard. Moving on, Dana asks if Jun has any regrets? Jun says the only regrets are having gotten into fights with people and having to show the nasty side of Jun. Um, having to show it? It’s not like you went out of your way – it was on display every single day.