Temptation Island 3, Episode 6: Talk Dirty to Me, Baby

Those of you who read my Temptation Island 2 recaps know that I absolutely LOVED the short-lived show The Tick, which played on Fox opposite Survivor a couple of years ago. Even though Fox obviously gave the show every chance to succeed - I mean, how could it not, with that prime time slot - it was quickly cancelled.

But you have another chance. On September 30, the entire nine-episode run of The Tick live action show (that's three more than were shown on Fox) will be released on DVD. I cannot stress this enough - you owe it to yourself to check this out. It's nothing less than the funniest show I've ever seen on TV. Do yourself a favor and order it NOW, by following this link.

Sorry about that. I appreciate the indulgence there. A minor note: TI3 host Mark Walberg will next be hosting House Rules, a home-improvement show on TBS premiering October 8th at 10 Eastern. I say this because I'm sincerely hoping that people watch this show because of him, and not because they actually like it.

In any case, Temptation Island 3 bombed in the ratings again, moving back down to fifth place in its time slot with a 3.1 rating. I'll admit, I thought it would drop more than that with the premiere episode of The Rupert Show, co-starring the other Survivors, but there's no accounting for taste, or lack thereof.

Speaking of lack of taste, on to the penultimate episode of TI3. Something interesting here, as I didn't realize that tonight's show was a two-parter, and didn't watch or tape the first half. Obviously, I watched The Rupert Show instead. While watching this episode, I got the vague feeling that I was missing something, and it wasn't until I noticed the guide listings at the bottom of the screen that I realized I had skipped an episode. In my mind, that just goes to show how incredibly DULL this show is.

For those who haven't realized it yet, I missed an episode. Click here to read Sting7's wonderful recap of Episode 5. Big, BIG thanks to the Stinger for helping me out of a jam. You rock, Sting!

Ian recaps the argument between Melissa and Kristin, which basically boils down to Kristin demanding that Melissa fall into lockstep to what the others say. Kristin says that all their (the other three girls') decisions are based out of respect for Melissa. So, apparently, demanding that Melissa boot the man she wants to keep is respectful to Melissa? Right. Then Kristin has the gall to say that Jerome and Melissa have "affected [her] experience." Geez, is she ALWAYS this much of a busybody? Kristin being such a crab-ass has affected my experience of watching this show.

Sure, my experience watching the show would suck either way, but that's not the point. But basically, if Kristin doesn't like Jerome and Melissa does, well, that's tough for Kristin, isn't it? In a normal, non-psychotic universe, one would think that would be the case.

Jerome doesn't care, he's used to people not liking him. Melissa says Kristin needs a shirt that says "Drama Queen." Ah, so you're going to lend her yours? Not to say that Melissa is a drama queen, but they show a clip immediately preceding that soundbite of Melissa walking to the room and announcing "I'm HERE!" Sheesh.

The women gather to choose their next dates. BUT WAIT! They have to vote someone off first. Here it gets mildly intriguing, as Stephanie tells us that Derrick had requested to be voted off. Apparently, he was getting a bit too attached to Stephanie after seeing her on a date with Jeff. Also, Kristin volunteers to be the one to "announce" the news to Derrick, which draws laughter from the men. Now THAT'S funny.

I also can't decide if this was a classy move or stupidity (in other words, what were you expecting?) on Derrick's part. Then I realized I didn't care. Derrick notes that he doesn't like head games, referring to Stephanie's choice of Jeff for the previous date. I think.

Stephanie chooses Michael for her third date, mentioning that OBVIOUSLY (her words) Jeff expected her to choose him. But she wanted to be alone, or something. Maybe it's my lack of caring, but Stephanie's thought patterns make NO SENSE to me whatsoever. If you were feeling down or upset, wouldn't you want to spend time with someone you felt comfortable with?

Kristin takes Gules because she hasn't had any one-on-one time with him. Kara selects Ian because they hung out and got along. Melissa makes a little speech, saying she doesn't care what people think about her choice. That's kinda like me, except I just don't care, period. She takes Jerome, duh.

Melissa and Jerome take a sailboat ride. They have fun. He's "sweet." It's as interesting as it sounds. Melissa thinks there's something about Jerome… and it has nothing to do with franks and beans, I hope. Wow, that's a pretty obscure joke, and that's saying something for me.