Sorority Life 3, Episode 3: My Kingdom for a Range Rover?

Opening. Interviews about the car situation. There are two Range Rovers for the pledges to use and six pledges. But Michelle is hogging one of the cars, so it’s really like there is one Range Rover and five pledges. We can begin to see the steam coming out of Val’s ears as she says sharing is something a 10-year-old child should be able to do. Michelle says, “It’s not that I can’t share the car. I just don’t want to.”

I don’t think that’s sincere sisterhood.

There’s a meeting with Val about the cars. Michelle says there’s no rules about the cars so she’s just been keeping one of them the whole day. But Janelle has come up with a solution, a chart to check out the car and write down when the pledge will be back. Michelle says she doesn’t understand why the two Range Rovers are a big deal since all the other sisters have cars and she doesn’t. Frankly, she’s got a point here. It’s the only point she’ll have for the next half-hour. Michelle says she doesn’t mind being dropped off and picked up from class if her housemates don’t mind getting up that early.

Val says that’s a workable solution and tells them to fix it. And the steam keeps coming.

As soon as the meeting’s over, however, Michelle takes off with fellow pledge Monica in one of the Range Rovers. She says it’s not fair that the other pledges have a car and she doesn’t and she just wants to get away from the problems in the house.

At 8:30 the next morning, Michelle wakes up Salina to take her to class. But Carmen, who’s a real snotty Sleeping Beauty when someone interrupts her slumber, says it’s not nice to be loud when people are sleeping. Salina says Michelle needs to improve her communication.

That night, Sarifa goes and gets Michelle and brings her home. Michelle makes plans to meet up with a sister. Sarifa says she’s been too busy studying to hang out with the sisters.

The next day, Michelle takes the car. It’s time for a pledge meeting, the sisters call and need rides, and there’s only one car. Janelle calls Michelle and asks her to pick up some of the actives. But because of all the jockeying and calling, they are two minutes late for their meeting. Val docks them all 10 points and everyone is mad at Michelle.

Val says making her meeting is more important than getting rides, but the pledges say if they don’t give rides to the sisters, the sisters will be mad. So they’re screwed either way, basically. Janelle says she’s tired and discouraged and doesn’t know if she can keep going.

At the pledge house, Michelle’s still out with the car. Carmen announces in an annoying sing-song voice she’s received an e-mail from an alumni. Meena remarks she hasn’t been to one pledge event yet.

Michelle finally gets home. Janelle says the rules have been placed there about the cars and she’s not following them. The car is for all of them to use, to get to and from campus and to go to pledge events.

Michelle says she thought the time she would get back was an estimated time, but Janelle points out that she’s three hours late, so no one’s buying her estimate.

Janelle needs the cars tomorrow by 5:30 p.m. to take some sisters to a ball game. Michelle, pouty and upset, says she “hopes” she’ll have it back in time.

The next day, Michelle does bring the car back by 5:30, but Janelle isn’t there so she takes off AGAIN. Probably not her best move. She and Monica go shopping on Melrose and all the sisters fume. Janelle gets back at 5:45 and both cars are gone. She calls Val, who calls Michelle and orders her to bring the car back. She whines to Monica that they have to bring the car back right now. Is she really that clueless?

In the meantime, Carmen and Salina bring the other car back, so Janelle takes off. Michelle is upset she brought the car back for nothing.

So the group has their second meeting with Val about the cars and Val is even angrier. Janelle says the car wasn’t there when it was supposed to be and there was no communication. Then she says she doesn’t know what kind of sharing Michelle did in her house but it’s not flying here. Michelle feels attacked and the fun begins.

“I’m seeing how they really are,” she says. No one can see how Michelle really is, however, because she just sits there and says nothing the whole time, further infuriating the sisters.

Val says Michelle is separated from the sisters now, but it should go away when the car issue is solved. She sends everyone home and asks Janelle and Michelle to stay. But Michelle clams up again when it’s just the three of them, so she and Val go upstairs to talk.

This makes Janelle even madder. Janelle says if Val continues to hold Michelle’s hand, it will just perpetuate the problem. She goes upstairs and confronts Val, saying the two are talking behind her back. If Michelle can’t talk about her in front of her, she shouldn’t be talking to others. Janelle says Michelle put herself in the leadership position of the house and can’t even talk to the others.

Val gets mad and says they weren’t talking about Janelle and says she doesn’t appreciate being called a liar. She says she’s trying to find out what Michelle’s problem is, then they can all talk. Janelle leaves in a huff.

Michelle eventually comes home. All the sisters are downstairs laughing and talking and she goes upstairs and goes to bed. She says she doesn’t have the support of anyone and everyone’s true colors are coming out.

Next week: A pledge is depledged! God, it could be just about any of them at this point!

Jennifer Shrader traded in her boyfriend for a dog, who is always happy to see her, is properly housetrained, and doesn't drink all her liquor while she's taking a nap. She and her dog live in the Deep South, where she's a reporter for a community newspaper.

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