Survivor: Pearl Islands – Questions Regarding Episode 9

Dear Mitzie,

As always, Survivor has left me with more questions than answers. I don't know where to begin, so let's do this newspaper-style, as in starting off with the lead first. And this season, what other lead could there be besides your fellow Hoosier, Rupert?

Why the heck is everyone so afraid of Rupert? It's not that I want him gone, necessarily. After all, without him, this season would put me to sleep. But in the "coconut" challenge, the others had the perfect opportunity to take the game into their own hands and send Rupe back to the sidelines. By the time anyone did anything, it was too late. Usually in this type of challenge, you target the strong first, as happened to Dave in the Amazon. Instead, Ryan O. was a sitting duck, with his supposed allies, Darrah and Tijuana, leading the way.

It was lamented that Rupe has Sandra and Christa in his back pocket, but apparently they're looking for a way out of that pocket. It's like all the kids in school trying to find a way to handle the big bad bully, but instead of banding together, they work alone and hence nothing ever gets done. Mitz, I don't know if you ever watched Little House on the Prairie, but I remember this one episode where a bully was dominating the school and one kid said, "Guess there's not much one person can do alone." But then he got a brainstorm and rounded the kids all up together, took on the bully, and said bully ended up with a black eye and a serious attitude adjustment. But for some reason, no one seems to be able to do that in Pearl Islands.

Don't misunderstand me, Mitz. I'm not saying Rupert is a bully. In fact, a bully would sit back, let everyone ELSE catch the fish, and then take 'em all for himself. Rupert isn't like that, obviously. In fact, I think he's got a heart of gold. What I'm saying is, he is sooooo dominating this game, not only physically, but apparently mentally. I've got a few theories on why everyone's afraid of the Big Bad Ru. Tell me what you think, Mitzie.

1. The others have him mistaken for Popeye's arch-enemy Bluto and are waiting until they find a can of spinach before they challenge him.

2. They have him mistaken for Hagrid from Harry Potter and are afraid he'll turn them all into toadstools if they vote him out. No Mitz, I haven't see the movie nor have I read the book, so I don't know if Hagrid can or even would do that anyway. But the others may not know that.

3. They think he really is Grizzly Adams and will sic a bear on them if they make a wrong move.

4. There's just a glare in his eye that serves the same purpose as the music of the Pied Piper. Maybe the cutting room floor is filled with scenes of the others blindly following him around after getting that stare aimed their way.

5. They think he's media mogul Rupert Murdock and if they cross him, he'll use his outlets to humiliate them on an international scale.

6. Maybe they think he's songwriter Rupert Holmes, the guy who wrote "The Pina Colada Song," and once voted out, he'll write a ditty about all of them.

Even when he's not on camera, the game seems centered on the big man. This edition of the show may as well be called, "Survivor: RuPearl." Think about it, Mitz. Pearl Islands without Rupe would almost be like The Mary Tyler Moore Show without its namesake. You got Christa and Sandra as his best friends who secretly want to oust him, with Jon playing the guy no one likes, but manages to stick around anyway. He's kind of like Ted Baxter to Rupert's Lou Grant. Burton and Lillian play the two characters with an axe to grind, while Tijuana and Darrah are bit players at best, and maybe just extras. Notice, by the way, that I said, "RuPearl," not "RuPaul." After all, there's only room in the game for ONE guy wearing a skirt. Sorry, couldn't resist.

Anyway, Mitz, I was in a musical mood while writing this and came up with a song. See what you think. I wrote this to the tune of "Candyman."

Who controls the Islands?
Tribal Council too
If you try to vote him out your game will turn to goo
The Rupy Man,
The Rupy Man can.
The Rupy Man can, 'cause he catches lots of fish and keeps us all well fed.
The Rupy Man rules, plays the rest for fools, Those who target him he ditches
If his ouster's in your wishes,
You may not be getting fishes.

Well, Mitz, there are other questions about this episode as well. For instance, just what is it the producers aren't showing us? For example, did Ryan O., knowing he was on the chopping block, tell Darrah and Ti to turn on him? And was it good strategy to do so? I'd say yes, because maybe now, they'll end up staying in the game longer than Jon.