Real World/Road Rules Challenge: The Gauntlet, Episode 12: Turn the Beat Around

I have to be honest, I’m not up on dating shows. How many of them end up “happily ever after”? Due to my commitment to this show, I missed the spectacle of Average Joe, so I don’t care about it one way or the other. But I did hear about the homecoming queen picking a guy named Jason over an Adam. That made me smile. I know it shouldn’t have, but it did.

Previously on The Gauntlet: Roni beat Mike in Rolling On a River, winning $10,000 for her team’s check-fattened bank account. Coral feels that the girls are being picked on and that it’s coming down to all boys. Naturally, the camera pans to the soon-to-be-gone Elka while Coral says this. Back to ROAR, Sarah got knocked off the log by Laterrian, and she eviscerates him in her interview. He just mumbles something about college foundations knocking on his door.

Mansion. Nathan tells Mike and Norman that he’s sick of losing and that the team has to win some Gauntlets to prevent a mismatch in the final mission. Mike asks who on the team finishes at the top of the competitions. Nathan answers the three people in the room. Honestly, it is hard to discern the best of the RW, given that nobody has had the one dramatic win. Nathan interviews that RW has had their ups and downs. Flashback to Holey Canoe, with Matt steering, Coral freaking out, and Nathan cursing at her. Good times. “It’s been one big tension ball,” Nathan continues. “When you hit rock bottom, the only place you can go is up.”

Outside. Adam discusses voting strategy with Theo V. and Dave. He feels that they can’t afford to lose a guy in the Gauntlet. “They have two less girls than we do,” he explains, “so obviously, to even it out, we get rid of a girl.” It’s a wonder he gets dates that aren’t producer-arranged. Adam interviews that Theo, Dave, and himself have risen to the top. He continues: “The way top win these challenges is to [super obvious cut] vote off all the girls.” Even with the ham-fisted editing, Adam is still a loser.

Cut to the mansion. The editors have piped in “Not Gonna Get Us” by the Russian duo known as t.A.t.U. You know the song; it’s the one they did at the MTV Movie Awards, and the set finished with dozens of women in school uniforms making out with each other. Great times. Coral tells Veronica she doesn’t want to be available to be sent into the Gauntlet just because she’s a girl. “The guys are scared to sacrifice another guy,” Veronica interviews. “They think the girls aren’t as strong as the boys.” Sounds like Ruthie picked the wrong Challenge.

Back to the RR Brain Trust, such as it is. Adam says it would hurt to lose a guy before the final mission. “I’m playing for the $150,000 and the fifteenth mission,” Dave interviews. “The potential that a guy can offer is a lot better than what, say, Veronica can offer.” *koff*Foreshadowing!*koff* And I still think Dave asks Cara permission to trash-talk the ladies. Adam notes that if not for the money, people would have gone home. He does make a valid point; Battle of the Sexes was loaded with deserters, and Sarah would’ve bailed out a long time ago if there wasn’t a bank involved. “I love my girls,” he interviews, “but at the end of the day, the girls are going to be the ones to look the weakest.” Your girls? Seriously, who should beat this guy up? So far, I got Ruthie, Sarah, Ellen, Emily, Jisela, Sophia, Blair and Steve, Coral, Veronica and Rachel, Timmy, Ethan Zohn and Jenna Lewis, and t.A.t.U. What? Russian lesbians can’t hate Adam, too?

Mansion. Coral reads the clue off the sponsor phone. The next mission will test the players’ endurance. “Like the others ones haven’t?” Coral quips. She continues to read: pick-up time is 6:45 a.m., wear team sweaters and sneakers. Alton and Irulan joke about working out.

Cut to the gym. Mike and Laterrian lift some weights. Roni, Rachel, and Veronica heft small barbells. Theo V. cleans and jerks. Theo G., on the phone: “I’m here in the gym with the Hulks.” Only thing missing is Amaya and Melissa doing some funky aerobics. He interviews that he has to start performing, or else he’s going to the Gauntlet.

Gauntlet site. The soundtrack blasts some scratching as we look at a giant record. Jonny welcomes everybody to Turntable. The objective: sit on the spinning platform as long as possible. The player who stays on the longest wins $10,000 for the team bank account. The rotation speed of the turntable also increases in time. Dave expositions that the players must hang onto balls which are attached to the wheel. Jonny reminds the players that the last player from each team will receive the Freshlook Lifesaver.

The players find places to sit on the wheel as it begins to rotate. “I think I’m the stronger person on the team,” Adam interviews. “When it comes down to it, I’m going to be the last man standing.” That was probably taken out of context of this episode, but I’m surprised his arm hasn’t broken off from all the times he patted himself on the back. Jonny asks both teams if they’re ready, and he blows his whistle to start the game. The editors have fun, moving the film back and forth and adding scratch sound effects. A few RR guys yell out the “Hey Road Rules” chant. Abram: “It’s like a big merry-go-round that goes really, really fast.”