The average Joes have to compete in a triathlon for a date with Larissa. But what they don’t know is that this elimination night is different. Approaching them like a torpedo in the water (where else would a torpedo be?) is a boat full of… himbos!
So here we go… this is the episode where the hot men come in and try to take over Larissa and the house from our Joes. Now, if we remember correctly, last year there were only three Himbos going up against our Joes and now we have eight which just seems a little excessive to me. I mean we all know that she has to come down to just one Joe and one Himbo in the final rounds so all we really have to do is just wait and see which of the Joes will be the last one to stick around until the end. My gut says it will be Tony but I wouldn’t surprised if it’s Mike. As for Fredo… eh. I don’t see him making the final rounds. Definitely not David. Gag me if it’s David. Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaavid Daskel.
Anyway, quick viewer mail moment. No, I have no clue why Justin left the show. I’ve read so many supposed rumors that he got into an altercation with one of the producers to he got drunk and tried to get more than a little frisky with Larissa to one of his family members was either sick or died or was sick and dying. Of course, knowing that it’s reality TV, if they can milk some drama like a sick, dead, or sick and dying family member they are going to do it (can anyone say Meredith?) so his truly unexplained departure from the program is still making more than a few people wonder what’s going on. Alas, we didn’t get any more info by asking Donato about it in our interview with him, either.
So… basically we get that image of the himbos on the boat with their shirts all off showing that they have spent way too much time in the gym working out, in front of the mirror with the clippers or wax or Nair taking off their chest hair, and not enough time working on their social graces with their fellow man (as we saw in many of the previews). I’m going to make this part as brief as possible since I am also having to resist the urge to take one of them by the head and give him a headbutt (and don’t think I won’t do it either – just ask some of my rugby teammates who have been on the receiving end of some of my headbutts). And here we go (with my lovely commentary included for your reading pleasure). Yes, please note that this is all out of order as it appears in the show but I feel it’s necessary to get them all out of the way first because… blech… I don’t want to have to keep revisiting them over and over and over throughout the mini-competition the Joes have going.
Michael C vows to make the Joes paradise into Hell. That’s nice Michael C. Now here is a pail and shovel. Go build me a nice sand castle and don’t wander too far into the water. I’d hate for an undertow to suck you under and I wouldn’t be able to swim out there to save you.
Jim, our former limo rider, says that the guy are going to have to deal with his six pack of abs. Oooh it’s the Six Pack Abs of Death… oh no! Watch as I melt away into nothingness. Not. Note to gym, I mean Jim… who cares about the six pack abs when you have a six pack (of beer) for a brain. I don’t have a six pack and at one point I was dating five guys at the same time and was called a slut by the president of my fan club (I have the pictures of the fan club’s meeting where they are wearing their official C. Brian Devinney Fan Club sweatshirts and for the record, I’ve cut back to three so I’m not a slut.) Six pack abs really don’t mean anything.
Michael K. says only nice guys finish last and he’s not going to finish last. Interesting. Since you only have a 1 in 8 chance of being the final Himbo standing, is that really how you want to portray yourself to the dating public? As a meanie?
Jerry (who has an adorable accent) was actually rather demure compared to the others when he said that the Himbos were going to take over the island. Hmmm. For a while maybe. Then Larissa takes over again.
Pete says he and the Himbos are “torpedoes in the water” and taking aim at the Joes. Pete. Pete. Pete. How redundant of you. Torpedoes are only in the water. They are underwater missiles. I mean really now. When you’re going to brag like that at least make it seem like you have a modicum of intelligence. Unless you’re referring to some other form of torpedo and then I just don’t want to know.
Theo doesn’t care if someone is a Himbo or a Joe since he’s on a “search and destroy” mission. Theo, I had hopes for you. Sigh. I can’t continue… moving on…
Todd gives perhaps the politest of the intro saying he can’t wait to see the look on the Joes’ faces. Okay, Todd, as of right now you are the only Himbo I like. Please don’t disappoint me and become an ass.
Gil doesn’t think the Joes are the total package since they don’t seem to work on their looks. Here’s a mirror Gil. You just keep looking into it and talking to yourself since pretty much you’re the only one who will really care about anything you have to say. Frankly, it’s sh*t like this that pisses me off the most (pardon my Greek)… I mean just because someone isn’t spending nine hours a day doing Tarzan style ab crunches doesn’t mean they don’t care about how they look.
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