For Love or Money 4, Episode 4: The Gaming of the Shrew

Last week, Rachel made a slip of the tongue. A verbal one. She accidentally referred to Morgan as Jordan and aroused some suspicion, since she was supposedly plucked from a farm or something and had never met host Creepy Jordan or played this game before. Speaking of slips of the tongue, poor trusting Caleb told most of the other guys that he had a million dollar check. When Jordan announced an opportunity to swap checks, Caleb’s heart sank. And, so did his value, as crafty Morgan (thanks to some information from Zen Master Mike) swapped checks with Caleb.

So, let’s check the tote board, and see how much money these guys’ checks are worth:

• Caleb ($1), Realtor, Tempe, Arizona
• Mike ($250,000) , Corporate Financial Sales, Santa Monica, California
• David ($1), Sales Rep, Miami, Florida
• Morgan ($1 million), Sales, Chicago, Illinois

So, it looks like Rachel is keeping David as an “insurance policy,” but apparently not a good one. She may have genuine feelings for Caleb, or for her sake, let’s hope so. Mike is a mystery, he swears he’s not interested in money, but he could be playing us all. There’s something shifty in that guy’s eyes. And, Stud Muffin Morgan (so he thinks) is the only million dollar man left. He clearly likes the money more than he likes Rachel, but he seems to be the one who makes her frozen heart sing. O, what a tangled web…

What happens now?

Solo dates happen now. But, first, each guy gives the state of their union, if you will. Mike says things are really tense now in the house, with it just being four men left. Morgan says it’s not about camaraderie anymore, saying, “there’s four corners in a room, and one of us is in all of them.” David says he obviously isn’t playing for money; he wants to know if she is the one. Mike says he’s not sure if Rachel is being completely honest with him (she isn’t). Caleb says he doesn’t trust anybody anymore. Losing $999,999 will do that to a guy, I suppose.

The men meet with Creepy Jordan in the event room, and in typical Jordan fashion, he dishes out the good news/bad news scenario. The good news is there will be four solo dates today. The bad news is the men aren’t guaranteed to get one. Rachel has the option of extending her date with a guy into another date. So, somebody could be left sitting on that damn couch all day looking at the big clock on the liquid screen.

Caleb feels pretty sure that if he can get one date, he has a decent shot at extending it. Morgan says time with Rachel isn’t as important as keeping someone else from having time with Rachel. Mike wants to be first because he’ll know he’s “the first thing she thinks about in the morning.” David says he’s had virtually no alone time with Rachel, and elimination is going to be right after this.

Rachel makes her first selection. It’s Mike! (So, he is the first thing she thinks about in the morning! You believe that, don’t ya? Me neither.) Mike gets in the limo, and she goes on the offensive immediately. Rachel tells us that she knows Mike’s check value, and she really wants to know what his intentions are. So, she has questions. Many questions. And, she’s right in his face to ask them. Mike looks a bit taken aback. He says he just wants to have fun, Rachel tells us she doesn’t want small talk, she needs answers!

This is gonna be fun.

They go lawn bowling, so there is an appropriate lawn bowling outfit. Mike’s looks like a polo shirt and cargo shorts, frankly. Rachel’s… not so much. There is tight top with a silly bow at the neck, and this skirt that looks like it was made from the finest burlap. Mike liked it, Rachel didn’t.

They bowl, but Rachel, being the material girl she is, says they should play for something. Mike says kisses. Rachel says yeah, whatever. Mike takes his shot, crowing that he’s going to get lots of kisses. Rachel, eyes narrowed, knocks his ball away from the pin or whatever. Mike is surprised with her skill (Rachel is a gamer from waaay back, buddy), and calls her a “hustler.” Rachel takes umbrage with that, it’s bugging her. So, Mike calls her a hustler again. Swell.

Meanwhile, at the mansion, Morgan tells David that Mike told him that in the 15 minute date he had with Rachel earlier, 10 minutes of it was making out. David doesn’t like that news at all. David asks if Morgan has kissed Rachel. Morgan lies that he hasn’t (they did, but they both had one eye open, like they were looking for the dagger to come out eventually). Here comes Caleb. He likes the news even less.

Rachel tells us she doesn’t really know what Mike’s deal is, and it may be too much of a gamble to keep him around. Rachel makes no bones about the fact that she is going on another date. With someone else. Mike takes that pretty well.

Tick-tock, time for the next victim, er, date. It’s David! He’s thrilled! He tells us he finally gets some time alone with Rachel. She meets him in a park, with roller skates on. They skate, they giggle a lot, they eat lunch, a nice little picnic. Rachel says David is a lot of fun, and she likes that in a guy.

Back at the house, Mike returns and Caleb goes all Perry Mason on him. Why didn’t you tell me you made out with her? (To us, Zen Master scoffs at the term “made out.” So unevolved.) Mike says he wouldn’t call it “making out.” Of course, we get the black and white of serious lip action going down. Caleb can see he’s not going to get very far with the crafty Mike, so he dismisses the witness.

David says he can see in Rachel’s eyes that she’s genuine. Rachel says she thinks David thinks she’s genuine. His being all fun and cute and all makes him easier to play, because she does have some attraction to him. Still, he seems to say all the right things, and that makes her nervous. Rachel reaches for her cell phone - it’s time for another victim, er, date. David playfully asks her if she’s really gonna use that thing. She kisses him. That would be ‘yes.’

Tick-tock…

It’s Caleb! Caleb was just shy of having a cow waiting to see if he’d be picked, so he’s quite relieved. Morgan, who swore he wasn’t concerned, is suddenly concerned. Caleb meets Rachel at a vineyard for a bit of wine tasting (she had wine with David too, she’s gonna be hammered before this day is over!). Rachel says seeing Caleb get out of the limo put a smile on her face that she didn’t expect.

Meanwhile, David finally has something to talk about. The smile on his face looks perma-sealed, so Morgan asks what happened. On a scale of 1 to 10, how good was the date? David says “10” without hesitation. So, the next question, obviously is “did you kiss her?” David asks “what do you think?” in that of-course-I-did sort way. To us, Morgan says he’s not sure he’s buying it. Mike looked a bit concerned to know lip locks are happening with everyone. That’s not Zen.

Caleb says not having a million dollars to worry about definitely put him at ease. Apparently so, because Rachel tells us she was shocked by Caleb, his personality, and his ease of being. She says she thinks he’s adorable, and the personality that shone through is knocking her off kilter. They share their thoughts about the process, and lo and behold, Rachel is getting that fawning look in her eyes. Rachel tells us she felt compelled to kiss him, but Caleb says he’s not going to get all googly when she’s kissing his roommates too.