Renovate My Family, Episode 1: The Biggins

America fell in love with the Biggins family from Dallas when they first appeared on Trading Spouses: Meet Your New Mommy (Episode 1 and Episode 2), so some genius at Fox decided, why not bring them back for more! They are the perfect “victims” and, since they just won the big prize ($50,000) on the last show, they are certainly on a roll. Part of the deal on Trading Spouses was that they would spend the money to buy a new house. I wonder if renovating their existing home violates the terms of the agreement. Hmmm.

We are welcomed to the show by host Jay McGraw, who is the son of diet guru and psychiatrist, Dr. Phil. Jay is a lawyer, but he promises to guide us through the emotional journey about to ensue. In one week, the family’s home will be completely renovated, while at the same time the family members will be undergoing “lifestyle makeovers.” This sounds intriguing enough.

We meet the family – Mela (the Mom who was traded), Anthony (the Dad who was none too happy until it was payday), and their children, Chrishara, Omar, and Zikea. They are at the local “Y” when they are given the news that they have been chosen to appear on Renovate My Family. Their initial reaction is a bit strange but, once they understand the implications of what they have been told, they begin to get excited. There isn’t much time to celebrate, however, as they must hurry to get all of their belongings out of the house to prepare for the renovation. They are given two hours to accomplish this task.

They meet the “Design Team” – Jude (the hair and makeup guy), Kahi (the interior designer), and Erica, Jacqueline, and Nicole Dahm (attractive blonde triplets who are referred to as the “Construction Team”). Jay tells us that the triplets know what they are doing, but one has to wonder. The construction foreman, Scott McCray, is introduced, and begins the initial assessment of the Biggins family. Jude is puzzled by Chrishara’s hairpieces and rewards the family dog, Sugar, with one of them. This is not going well.

The moving process begins in earnest, and Mela is horrified when Jude starts throwing out her shoes. Anthony seems rooted to his couch, but is finally forced out the door. Outside, massive construction equipment is in position, and the family seems startled by the presence of these giant yellow cranes. At this point it is not clear to them why this equipment is required for a remodeling job. They are told that the house will have to be gutted and that they are going to do the work. They return to the house and begin smashing up the walls with sledgehammers. Anthony breaks his sledgehammer in half. What a guy!

Bad news! The building inspector arrives and announces that the house has serious foundation problems, and is beyond repair. Jay tells them that they are going to have to tear the house down and rebuild from the ground up. Now we finally understand the need for the three giant cranes, which make quick work of the demolition. Mela had never seen the attic before, and watches it disappear in the rubble. Anthony is not quite as enthused and feels homeless, which, of course, he actually is. The crane destroys his barbecue grill, and this distresses him even further. Adios to the dog house as well. Once the house is completely destroyed, the family heads off for their “next adventure.”

Off they go in a stretch SUV. Anthony is feeling nostalgic about the house (we see a shot of the heap that was their home). Mela is sad too, but understands that something better is going to come from all of this. Jay tells us, “Now the real work begins,” and, sure enough, they are taken to the Cooper Wellness Center, where they will spend the next week. In an interesting segment, Mela’s aunt stops by to deliver lunch and can’t believe her eyes. She invites them to stop at her house next!

Back at the clinic, the Biggins family gets ready to be “poked” and “probed,” and Mela tells us, “I don’t want to know what’s wrong with me.” They meet the doctor and answer a variety of questions. These people are not living healthy, that’s for sure. Anthony admits to smoking and Omar to watching five hours of television a day. They get physicals, stress tests, blood work, lung capacity tests, and body fat analysis.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, the construction crew is distressed by the fact that they have to build a new foundation and do it all in seven days. They weren’t prepared for this, and it adds considerable work to an already overly ambitious schedule. The triplets are getting covered in cement, messing up their pretty faces and nice hairdos.

At the clinic, the Biggins are told that four out of the five family members are obese. No surprise there. Dr. Kerans warns them that this is a serious health issue, and that they are going to have to change their lifestyles completely, making a lifetime commitment to healthy living. Mela is irritated by all of this, and tells us, “You don’t need to tell me I’m fat!”