Wickedly Perfect, Episode 3: Kimberly and Cornish Hens, Sitting in a Tree

Previously on Wickedly Perfect: dueling dinner parties. Denise called Mitch a pansy. The Beavers won again, and Michelle and Dawn were placed in the bottom two. Michelle was sent packing, despite her delicious desserts.

Dawn is trying to organize the kitchen of the Domestic Domicile. She calls herself a perfectionist, which makes sense, since this show is called Wickedly Perfect, not Wickedly Mediocre.

Joan Lunden greets the teams, telling them that they’ll spend the night camping. They’ll have to decorate their campsites and cook a meal for the judges. They will be judged on aesthetics, functionality, taste, and presentation. For their individual projects, they must use nature to “create something from nothing.” They’re required to use a map. The teams are reminded that one of the two least impressive creators will be sent home.

The teams are to head to Sears, where they have one hour and $5,000 to shop. They also have $500 for groceries; it must be used for both team and individual projects. The campgrounds will include lumber and electricity.

Now that Team Artisan has four contestants to the Crafty Beavers’ six, the teams need to be evened up. Joan tells Denise that her name was picked at random, so she’s now a member of Team Artisan. Denise and Margo on the same team? Awesome. The teams have 48 hours to do the whole challenge. Denise interviews that she was surprised to be picked to switch sides; she thought she would get to pick the person who would go. Darlene is excited to have Denise on her team and thinks that everyone will get along well. Mitch doesn’t – he thinks the women will butt heads, as he’s already done with her.

The Crafty Beavers try to prep for their shopping trip; Tim wants himself, Mychael, and Amy to deal with food while the others work on the rest. They discuss a Moroccan theme, as well as chili, vegetables, and fish. Mitch thinks that Mychael will find it hard to simplify her cooking.

Team Artisan is prepping as well. Each woman has a different idea about how to decorate the campsite. Margo says that she decided that she would be the “team coordinator,” since their team isn’t working well together. The team discusses making ribs, but worry that they won’t be good enough; they remember that they’re being judged by Bobby Flay.

The Beavers shop, spending within their budget. Team Artisan looks at camping gear; Margo makes some very definitive decisions and hustles her team along. Unfortunately, they start going off in separate directions. Denise worries that Margo is going to go too far. With ten minutes left to shop, most of the women are still running around and grabbing things. Darlene asks if some blankets go with the bedding and Margo ignores her. Team Artisan is just four dollars under budget.

The Beavers shop for food as Mychael interviews that they’ve put their egos aside and are working well together. The members of Team Artisan, on the other hand, aren’t on the same page, and they’re not happy that Margo’s being a dictator and making all of the decisions. Kimberly wants Cornish hens. She wants them so much, she kisses one. Would you like to be alone with the hen, Kimberly? Denise says that things are tense and she hopes that everything will work out.

It’s camping time! The Beavers are working very well together. Amy thinks that the judges will want to see Mychael do something other than cook. Apparently the other Beavers feel the same way. Amy and Tim try to set up a tent without looking at the directions. Tim seems surprised when they’re not successful. Team Artisan doesn’t have much more luck with their tent.

Darlene’s suggestion of a real toilet has come to fruition. This is not camping, people. There’s wool or something on the toilet seat. Darlene says that women don’t go camping because there’s no bathroom. I’d love to see Darlene try to survive on The Amazing Race. That would make my day. When they’re done, Team Artisan’s Port-a-Potty is all red and green. It looks like Santa’s Port-a-Potty.

At midnight, with 14 hours left, the Beavers are still building a display. Mitch has taken over Tim’s carpentry on the buffet piece, saying that Tim took too long on the apple furniture during the first challenge. Tim seems perfectly content to sit and watch. “Completion is better than perfection,” Mitch says. Once again – Wickedly Perfect. Not Wickedly Finished.

Darlene plants stuff. Kimberly thinks it looks good. Darlene wants to make a good first impression. At three a.m., the teams finally get to sleep. They’re up again at seven a.m. to work on their individual projects. Mychael is sewing some things together for a safety kit. Heather makes a photo album/journal. Amy makes an acorn purse. I think she went a little too far. Tim makes a deck, writing on it that the Crafty Beavers made it.

Margo makes a diary, saying that it was nice to reminisce in the middle of the night. Dawn makes “a memory box for travel souvenirs.” Darlene makes a basket, telling us not to laugh. She says something about weaving your best thoughts into a basket and taking it with you. She adds that the “basket-weavers of the world” are laughing at her. Not at you, Darlene, with you.

The teams finish everything up. Who brought an oriental rug? Camping, people. Mitch asks Mychael about when to cook their fish; Mychael tells him to use his judgment. She says that everyone always expects her to finish the food in the end. Tim praises Mychael’s work in the kitchen. She’s very happy with the way things are turning out. Mitch makes tartar sauce, declaring it “delicious” in an amusing voice. He says that “the Beavers are sittin’ pretty.” Yeah, on an oriental rug.

Darlene has made a fire in what looks like a trash basket. Kimberly puts initials on throws for the judges. Dawn talks about Denise’s idea to have matching shirts. Margo cooks potatoes for potato salad, saying that they’ll wait too cook their hamburgers so that the judges can have them cooked how they prefer. Margo has difficulties lighting the grill, deciding that they need to move the grill. There are 15 minutes left before the judges arrive. She’s worried about going to the Garden Guillotine. She wants to win badly, since she’s the sole provider for her kids. As Team Artisan finishes up their preparations, we see that they have a sign labeling the “Diva Grill.”

The 48 hours are up, and the Crafty Beavers have built a Moroccan-themed campsite. Team Artisan has named their campsite Camp Rustic Elegance. Bobby, Candace, and David arrive; they’ll spend an hour at each campsite. They go to Camp Beaver first, where David seems interested in drinking champagne in the woods. Strangely, the champagne is served in mugs. Mitch takes over as host, telling the judges that they’re having chili dogs, deep-fried rainbow trout, grilled Cornish hens, wild rice, and grilled vegetables. Wouldn’t it have been fun if they’d had to catch their own food? I bet Kimberly is jealous of their Cornish hens. Mitch should keep an eye on them in case Kimberly wants to kiss one.