Dancing with the Stars, Episode 1: A Waltz or a Death in the Family?

Carrie is first with her critique. She says that Kelly looked stiff and the performance wasn’t enjoyable. Bruno asks if there was a death in the family because her face was so serious. I noticed that as well, but I assumed that’s how it should be for a waltz. Len tells a long story of how dancing is like a lawn and flowers basically just to say that her performance had too much in it. Personally, I thought she did a great job. The news only gets worse as Kelly receives a five from Carrie and a four from both Bruno and Len. Her total is 13 points.

Before moving on to the next couple, Tom actually provides us with some helpful information. Viewers at home are able to vote five times per phone line and once online per e-mail account. If you have more than one favorite performer, share the love and the votes!

The next couple to dance is Charlotte Jorgensen and John O’Hurley, and they will be doing the cha cha cha to “September.” During their interview, it becomes apparent that John is a very intelligent and entertaining man; however, when I look at him, I see J. Peterman. During the performance, John makes a lot of facial expressions. He also appears to be having fun on the dance floor. Choreographically speaking, this is my favorite cha cha cha routine so far; unlike Joey and Evander, who were given less to do than their partners, John is moving around the floor a lot and is more of a participant than an observer. At the end of the routine, John touches Charlotte’s nose with his in a playful manner. How cute… and a bit disturbing!

The judges have nothing but praise for John. Bruno says that John gave a good performance; now he has to build on it. Carrie simply says that it was fantastic. Len, who is full of allegories and metaphors tonight, states that John is a golfer and he just scored a hole in one! The judges present their scores. Carrie and Len both give John a seven while Bruno gives him a six. John is now tied for first place with 20 points. Lisa asks John why viewers should vote for him. John quotes J. Peterman by simply stating, “Why, indeed!”

Our final performance of the evening is from Trista Sutter and Louis van Amstel. Trista says that her goal is to show the public that reality stars are talented. Louis says that he is a legend and that it feels good to be worshipped. Is this a contest to see who has the biggest ego? Now it’s time for the drama portion of the contest as Trista explains she has herniated discs and that her back could go out when Louis dips her. Why, may I ask, would you put yourself in such a position? Oh, I forgot… to show the viewing public that reality stars are talented…

Trista and Louis waltz to the song “Come away with Me.” Trista is smiling the entire time and enjoying herself. Many of her motions are very smooth; however, you can tell that from time to time, she is a bit hesitant with her moves. It’s probably because of her back. My biggest complaint about her performance outside of the signature pink she is wearing is that at the end, she and Louis very casually walk off the floor. I don’t get it!

Carrie is up first with her critique. She is very complimentary, saying that the waltz reminds her of a fairytale and that the performance reminded her of a fairytale too. She does tell Louis to be careful when he dips Trista because he appeared to be throwing her. I’m sure the legend didn’t appreciate that! Len comments that the performance was very balanced, but that he didn’t like the walk-off at the end. Bruno also states the Trista shows potential, but needs to make her lines longer when she extends herself. As an added bonus, we are treated to a shot of her husband Ryan in the audience. How nice!

Before giving us Trista’s results, the show takes a commercial break; however, when the live program resumes, Tom gives us a recap and states that three people are tied for first place, two are tied for second (he doesn’t want to say fourth place, which is what it is) and one team is in last place. Wait a moment! We didn’t get Trista’s scores, so how do we know there are two people in second place? At this point, only Evander is in second place! This is going to be the biggest scandal since Coreygate on American Idol! In any case, you know the routine and now you know the results; all three judges give Trista a six for a total of 18 points.

Our contestants stand as follows:

Joey, Rachel, and John – 20 points

Evander and Trista – 18 points

Kelly – 13 points

Kelly fans, don’t despair! No one is being eliminated tonight. Instead, viewers’ votes will be added to the judges’ scores from this week and next week; the celebrity with the lowest score will then be eliminated.

I thought this show was going to be completely awful; however, I now have to admit that even if I weren’t recapping it, I would still watch. The judges were entertaining without being over the top and the dance routines were enjoyable. I could do without the obvious questions asked by Lisa backstage and her excitement over a tie, but overall, I thought it was a satisfying hour. Tune in next week to find out which celebrity is being eliminated and then read the show recap here at RealityNewsOnline. Or, if you missed this first episode, it will re-air on Sunday, June 5, at 7/6 Central on ABC.

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