The Law Firm, Episode 1: And Dingo Was His Name-o

Ah… the oversized egos, the appalling behavior, the overachiever mentality, the failure complexes… you would think that I was talking about The Apprentice, but no, it’s just David E. Kelley’s foray in the world of reality TV with The Law Firm.

First and foremost, I love legal shows. The Practice, Perry Mason, L.A. Law, Law & Order, etc. I love ‘em all and can’t get enough of them. So when I heard that David E. Kelley, the man behind The Practice (a show I adore and watch continuously in repeats) and a former executive producer of L.A. Law, was going to come out with a legal-based reality TV show, I knew that I had to cover it. Well, it was that reason coupled with the fact that I worked as a legal recruiter for about four years.

So here we are on the premiere episode with more new names and faces than I care to remember. At the very least, I can be glad that it’s not an episode of The Bachelor when I have to remember 25 names and pray that I can tell one metrosexual male from another. Although the joy of doing The Bachelor is also pointing out some major fashion faux pas and wonder about the fashion sense in some people.

Now, without further ado, let me go ahead and introduce you to the twelve people who will be competing for the title of Top Young Legal Attorney (Out of the 12 People Who Are Actually On the Show and Not in the Entire Country) and the prize of $250,000. Incidentally, unlike The Apprentice, the winner of the show does not get to join host/judge/whatever Roy Black’s law firm but rather just gets the cash prize. According to an interview with Roy Black, there are a couple of lawyers he would like to hire from the twelve who appeared on the show, but he is prevented from doing so until after the show has fully aired. Hmmmm. The fun game for us can be to pick out which two lawyers he’s referring to and see if we’re right in the end.

But enough about that… I want to talk about the people (and get back to being snarky) who, upon arrival at The Law Firm, are escorted to the lounge where they will meet, mingle, and size up their competition. Another interesting note, there’s no “name” on the law firm like Skadden Arps or Chadbourne and Park. Just thought I’d mention that.

Aileen – Graduate of the Georgia State University College of Law and specializes in civil litigation.

Aileen looks like a famous celebrity or model from the mid-‘70s that I just can’t place. Maybe she looks like one of the bitchy, Type-A personality female lawyer types we saw on L.A. Law. Rosalind Shays, anyone? Nah… there’s no way she looks like Rosalind. Anyway, Aileen is a former criminal prosecutor, which means she does have courtroom experience, which should help her. What’s not going to help her is her attitude as she states in her NBC.com bio, she’s only lost one case in her entire career as a lawyer. “Fortunately, I've not had to develop the skill of being a good loser, and I don't intend to start now.” Can anyone say, “Ice Princess”?

Anika – Graduate of the Loyola Law School and specializes in criminal litigation.

I’m going to go ahead and say that so far, I adore Anika. I like that she’s strong-willed, determined, and has the spunk to go with it. She’ll let you think that you’re getting her down but in reality she already knows when she’s going to turn the tables on you and leave you unprepared. Elizabeth thinks she’s a tough cookie and a force to be reckoned with.

Barrett – Graduate of the Chicago Kent College of Law and specializes in personal injury.

Ah… I was wondering when we were going to get our first ambulance chaser. First and foremost, let me clarify that Barrett is a woman. I know, that was a bit shocking for me too because it’s not a name that I would associate with the female gender. I cracked up when I read the following in her bio: “I'm often assumed to be the court reporter or someone who couldn't possibly be that smart. Then, I kick the other guy's ass.” Hmmm, Barrett, maybe it’s that blank, vacuous stare that you keep giving the camera that leaves that impression?

What I will say is that Barrett in the pink outfit looked horrible. Not a good color for her.

Chris – Graduate of the Walter F. George School of Law at Mercer University with a specialty in Administrative Justice.

There’s something about Chris that I like and think he could go very far. He’s very calm and very sure of himself and doesn’t come off as cocky at all (unlike many of his competitors). Additionally, according to his NBC.com profile, he’s one of the few people on the show who is a fan of reality TV and offered the following insight: “It is fascinating to watch the interplay of different personalities in stressful situations. Prior to doing the show, I always thought I could do better. Now, I realize how difficult it can be to make the right decision.”

Deep – Graduate of Baylor University Law School and specializes in Criminal and Entertainment Law.

Hehehehehehe. So many places I could go with the “Criminal and Entertainment Law” juxtaposition. Deep could be the quiet assassin of this show. He shows a lot charm and ease in the welcoming party for the lawyers but something in him snaps to attention when it was time to get to the business of putting together their case. I have a feeling that some people are going to underestimate him and they’re going to wind up taking the elevator ride down to the lobby at the end of the episode.