I Want to Be a Hilton – The Finale

Welcome to the finale of I Want to Be a Hilton! We’re down to the final three - Vanessa, Jackaay, and Jaret. Kathy opens up the show with a recap of the season, highlighting the remaining contestants’ accomplishments and acknowledging the ones who didn’t make the list. She leaves the contestants a note saying that she wants some one-on-one time with each of them, and tells them to pick the location that best reflects their personality.

Jaret chooses to meet Kathy at Chelsea Piers sports complex, because he loves to run and feels comfortable around a track. After walking and talking with Kathy about growing up in a trailer park, Kathy sits him down and asks if he’d like to tell her anything about himself that she doesn’t already know. “I love to write poems,” Jaret responds. “Wow,” Kathy says, surprised. Jaret offers to recite one of his poems for her, about a person in heaven reflecting on the loved ones left behind. Awww. He really is just too sweet for words.

Kathy turns into a big pile of goo, blinks away tears, and tells him the poem was fabulous. Jaret says that he wrote it after his grandfather passed away. And yes, I know that I ragged on Niki for her dead grandfather story, but there’s something about Jaret that seems so sincere that I do believe him.

Jackaay chooses to meet Kathy at an art gallery, and says that she wants to talk to Kathy about some of the things she’s had to deal with in her life. Kathy asks Jackaay about her childhood and Jackaay reluctantly says that she had an okay childhood, despite her “sketchy” neighborhood. She starts to cry, though, as she talks about her parents’ marital problems, and about how she always had to take care of her sister.

“It bothers me,” she says. In an interview, Jackaay says she’s surprised at how emotional she got, but attributes it to being so comfortable around Kathy.

Vanessa opts to meet Kathy at the Park restaurant. She interviews that she feels really good about meeting with Kathy, saying that it’s a good opportunity for Kathy to get to know her better. She talks to Kathy a little about her life as a bartender and about her goal in life, which is to design fashion. She also tells Kathy that she’s not as bossy and overbearing as she comes across. Yeah, sure.

“I think your mom did an incredible job with you,” Kathy says. “Just because people have money doesn’t mean that they have class or manners.” And no one would know that better than the mom of Paris Hilton, I’m sure. Honestly, sometimes this show makes fun of itself.

Later that day, the contestants go to a training session at Sports Club LA. Jackaay interviews that she can’t even comprehend how much her life would change if she won. Vanessa interviews that she’s used to relying on herself, and she’s very focused on winning. Jaret says that he can’t believe how far he’s come, but that he doesn’t want to go back to his old life because he was miserable there.

That night, Kathy meets the contestants for a fancy dinner. Jaret says that the atmosphere felt very tense because everyone was trying to behave perfectly. As they finish eating, Kathy asks Jaret and Jackaay if she can have a few minutes alone with Vanessa.

Kathy tells Vanessa that she’s really glad that they got to spend time together earlier that day. “And I know,” she says, choosing her words carefully, “that you’ll be successful no matter what you do.” Vanessa, who’s got to be feeling the axe over her head by now, simply says, “Thank you.” Kathy says that the show is about transformation, and that Jaret and Jackaay have come so far. “So tonight I need to say goodbye to you,” Kathy says. Oh, thank heavens. See ya, Vanessa. Vanessa acts graciously for the first time in this show as she quietly thanks Kathy and reflects on her journey as she exits.

Kathy approaches Jaret and Jackaay on the pier, and tells them that they’re the final two. Jaret looks excited. Jackaay looks like she’s going to pass out. Kathy tells them that the next day, they’ll both be writing and delivering speeches to show Kathy what they’ve learned and why they should win. Jackaay interviews that she’s surprised that it came down to one person from Team Park and one from Team Madison. Yeah, and a male and a female, too. Oh, Jackaay, honey, that was planned. I’m actually a little upset with myself that I didn’t predict Vanessa leaving sooner, because as far as the reality show rules go, she was toast as soon as Kathy narrowed it down to the final three.

Jaret, Jackaay, and Vanessa take a boat back to Manhattan, and Jaret and Jackaay go up to the suite alone. (Don’t worry, there’s no hooking up involved.) Jackaay interviews that it was weird to be one of the only two people in the suite, and that she could still hear the echoes of the former contestants in the halls. “And then there was [sic] two,” Jaret says wryly.

The next day, Jaret and Jackaay get to work on their speeches. Jaret interviews that it was very nerve-wracking, and that the speech needs to incorporate everything he’s learned from Kathy. Jackaay says that she’s terrified of writing a “crappy speech,” and wants her speech to bring out the qualities inside her that make her special.

Jaret meets with a professional speechwriter named Stuart Gottlieb, who tells him that he needs to make the audience care about him. He advises starting off with a memorable statement, and then developing a theme from that statement. Stuart then meets with Jackaay. He tells her that it’s okay to be nervous, but that her biggest objective is to put the audience at ease.

Next, Jaret and Jackaay meet one-on-one with a speech therapist named Jacqueline Farrington, who does some Henry Higgins-type speech exercises with them. Jaret interviews that he’s very worried about his “huge Texas accent.” Then they both get all prettied up with exclusive spa treatments, courtesy of Kathy. Nice. Jackaay, especially, looks drop-dead gorgeous when she’s finished.