Being Bobby Brown, Episode 8: Jagged Little Pill

We see Bobby and Whitney are at dinner with some friends. Somehow, the question of whether Jesus Christ is Lord and Savior comes up. Bobby says he’s definitely Lord. Not sure about Savior. Whitney gets in a snit, voices get raised all over the table and Bobby, smartly, decides to bow out of the conversation and go on the patio.

He’s immediately seen by a car full of people, one of whom yells (very loudly, considering how high up Bobby was), “Bobby Brown? You out?” Yes, Bobby answers. Then to us, “Why do people always think I’m locked up somewhere?” Heh!

Bobby tells us he’s in Miami to meet with the Marley Brothers (presumably, children of Bob) to work on a song for his album. In the limo, Bobby reminds Whitney that she told him he can’t smoke around the kids anymore. So why is she currently puffing? She has no response.

Bobby tells us he’s been away too long. He badly wants to start making music again. In the studio, he sounds as good as he ever has. I actually never knew he had that strong of a voice! The Marleys are certainly grooving to him. Bobby tells us he thinks its time for him to get back out there. There is no other Bobby out there.

In that vein, Bobby and Whitney are clowning for the camera again. Bobby shows off his morning breath, which sends Whitney running! Once that breath is extinguished, they head to the grocery store. Bobby says he loves to cook and eat (we know!), so he always spends a lot of money at the grocery store. Back home, Bobby horrifies Bobbi Kristina by nipping and smelling Whitney’s toes. I’m pretty repulsed myself.

A song breaks out over daddy being “greedy.” Bobby ignores them. He’s working on some chicken and shrimp concoction. Tommy thinks he makes shrimp better. Bobby tells us that Bobby is clearly superior. Time for a cook off!

The Brown brothers prepare their shrimps. A guest calls it a tie. Tommy is outraged, “You have got to be sh*tting me! I know this is Bobby’s show, but damn! Wait ‘til I get my show!”

By the pool, Bobby sings to Whitney. She, of course, tells him he’s in the wrong key. Charming.

In Boston, Bobbi Kristina and Bobby go to visit LaPrincia, one of Bobby’s other children. Bobby feels like he’s home again. He spends a little time at the Funcenter with Bobbi Kristina and attracts a crowd. In the back of the car Bobbi Kristina is clowning with his daughter. Bobby Jr. calls her annoying. Bobbi Kristina objects. They finally meet up with LaPrincia. Bobby says she’s growing so fast, and is so beautiful. He tells the boys of the world… be afraid.

Next morning, LaPrincia and Bobby try to wake Bobby for shopping. He’s not budging. Tommy tells them to give up. LaPrincia kisses him goodbye and suddenly Bobby is awake. They aren’t waiting for him, though. Call me! Bobby slurs.

They come back, Bobby is holding court as usual, but Bobby sees something… is that a belly button ring? LaPrincia insists it’s a fake. If it were real, she couldn’t take it out so quickly, she points out. Bobby is not sure. He tells them he’ll be handing out ass-whoopings later. To us, he says he can discipline his kids, but he’s such a softie when it comes to his daughters.

Bobbi Kristina is testing that. She’s in a snit. LaPrincia says Bobbi Kristina won’t speak to her. That sends Bobby nuclear. He wants very much for his daughters to love and respect each other. Bobby calls for Bobbi Kristina, but jagged little pill that she is, she won’t tell him what’s wrong. She just keeps asking for the phone (to call Whitney to says she wants to come home, because she knows Whitney will cave). Bobby sends the camera crews away. This is serious.

That talk doesn’t help. LaPrincia says to us she is being a brat. Where is Bobbi Kristina? Pouting. Bobby tries to talk her into at least expressing her feelings to LaPrincia. Silence. Bobby tells us he was waiting for this day… when the daughters would fight about friends. It sounds like Bobbi Kristina wants to spend time with LaPrincia, but LaPrincia wants to spend time with her friends. Bobbi Kristina feels left out and wants to go home. Ohhhhhh. LaPrincia and Bobbi Kristina are pretty much locked in a room to work it out. They do.

Bobby says it’s hard raising girls. They are mad. You don’t know why they are mad. You’re mad because they are mad. It’s not easy, he says. He has a lot of learning to do yet.

Sting7 has been a respected published writer for many years, as a music editor, entertainment critic, columnist, and interviewer. He also has a curious love for pro-wrestling! You can email Stinger at stingseven@yahoo.com.

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