Rock Star: INXS, August 30 – Heaven Sent

It’s time once again to try to find the new sensation – are you ready? Brooke Burke is, as she walks out in a virtually see-through top and rather odd-looking pants that seem to be jean above the knees and white below. She tells us that in addition to some great rock songs this week, we will be joined by a choir – which people who saw the Sunday night VH1 episode (or read my recap) already knew. Also, there will be some strings and horns, which weren’t mentioned before.

Brooke introduces INXS and Dave Navarro, who mentions her boots. Ahh, the white material isn’t part of her pants, they’re boots. Damn, they’re big boots. Anyway, Brooke’s big booty, er, boots aren’t the reason we’re here. So she introduces the rock star wannabes and then we go back over what happened Sunday. If you missed it, check out the link in the previous paragraph to see how the contestants did in the recording studio with INXS. Short version: Jordis didn’t do the song justice, Marty screamed the first time but sang well the second, and J.D. screwed up the words multiple times.

We come back live and Dave says J.D. was the most vocal about wanting to front the band, and Dave is “personally stunned” that he didn’t learn the lyrics. J.D. says he didn’t try to put his interpretation on INXS’s song, but rather expected them to tell him what they wanted. Uh huh. Nice try.

Dave asks if any of the others buy it, and Suzie says she wasn’t in the booth but she did notice J.D. took quite a long time. Mig actually speaks in support of J.D., saying he has a method and a madness that has worked so far, so he wouldn’t knock him down ‘til he hears the finished product.

J.D. wants to ask a question: Were Jon and Andrew disappointed in his studio performance? Andrew says the whole point of the exercise was to bring who he was into the studio, and that’s what he did. Suzie looks confused, I feel confused, and the live audience is too confused to either clap or boo. What the hell did that mean? J.D. just told us he didn’t bring who he was into the studio, but now Andrew says he did. Wha?

Andrew quickly changes the subject, asking Jordis why she changed the melody. If I were Jordis, I would say that the point of the exercise was to bring who they were into the studio, and that’s what she did. She says something similar, indicating that she thought the point of the clinic was to interpret the song in their own way. Andrew says that if they were co-writing the song together, he would agree, but in this particular case he would have liked her to stick to the original melody. Jordis says she’s sorry, but really I think it’s Andrew who should be sorry. I mean, at least Jordis knew the freaking words! Yet she gets chastised while J.D. gets praised. Pah.

Kirk notes to Marty that he stayed up all night working on the song and has done everything they’ve asked him to do (though he did scream the song the first time through) – has that compromised him? Marty replies that he knew he had no understanding of the “soul” type of music as soon as he saw it. The first time through, he thought it went pretty terrible (he was right) and then when Andrew told him to try it in the “female key,” it came out much better. Dave says they heard a voice come out of him that they hadn’t heard yet, and INXS agrees.

Brooke leads us into commercial by telling us Ty will bring us the Rolling Stones. Cut to Ty waiting – and of course running his tongue over his lips. God, I’m sick of seeing his tongue.

Ty decided that “You Can’t Always Get What You Want” had to be his anthem because he grew up in the church choir, so he’s all about gospel and rock. Er, I admit to not knowing much about church choirs, and I’m sure helpful readers everywhere will correct me if I’m wrong, but how many church choirs sing rock? Anyway, he believes this song should definitely convince everyone that he’s the man for the job.

Ty gets one whole line into the song before his tongue makes an appearance. OK, it’s not being stuck out like he did a few weeks back, but why can’t he just keep the damned thing locked up? So, does Ty get what he needs out of this song? I don’t know. He does a good job with it, giving it a bit of his own twist that suited his voice – a voice that was perfectly clean and clear, I might add. I thought the choir was a bit of waste, honestly, but that has nothing to do with Ty.

Before getting comments, Ty points out his mother and other friends or relatives in the crowd. No, Mom doesn’t have the pointy Mohawk too. Dave says Ty’s voice was spot-on. Garry says he was incredible. Jon says it was f***ing awesome.

Next up is J.D., who Brooke introduces by noting that he has a history in the competition of rearranging well-known songs, “some more successfully than others.” Heh. What about taking on Elvis’ “Suspicious Minds”? Well, it turns out that J.D. used to perform as an Elvis impersonator, so he has some experience in this area.

And it kind of shows. He doesn’t do a full-on impersonation, but his voice definitely takes on an Elvis-like sound. Near the end of the song, he has the band kick up the tempo a few notches as he bounces around the stage like he’s on a pogo stick, but I’m not terribly impressed by the vocals.

Incidentally, some members of the choir back him up as well, though that hadn’t been mentioned previously (only two of the songs were supposedly going to be performed with the choir – Ty’s and “Bohemian Rhapsody,” later in the show).

Dave calls it “pretty damn good” and says it’s impossible not to watch him on stage. I’m thinking, “Yeah, like it’s impossible to not look at a car wreck on the highway.” However, he’s not really sure the performance will elevate J.D. in the competition. God, I hope not. Jon asks why J.D. picked that song, and J.D. says that for several years, he was just known as an Elvis impersonator and would be asked to sing Elvis songs as if he were a dancing monkey. So this is the first time he’s ever done it as himself. Andrew says it was a passionate delivery of a great song.