Survivor: Cook Islands – Missing Intelligence and Insider Clips: Two Great Tastes That Taste Great Together

Mike: Your MIA is in my Insider!
Heathyr: Your Insider is in my MIA!
Both: Mmmmm

Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup flashbacks, anyone? If someone flashed back to odd porn, I don’t want to know, okay? Thanks. So, Mike had to slack off on the first episode, which leaves me covering his sorry behind this week. No worries, next week, your MIA and your Insider will be separate and fabulous as always. This week though, let’s mix it up and see what we get, eh?

From the time it was announced tribes would be divided along ethnic lines, some groups have been clamoring for Survivor’s cancellation. Props to CBS for having the stones to not cave, because this is no different than dividing tribes along gender lines or age lines. Matter of fact, if you ask me, gender or age divisions are even more telling methods than culture, simply because men and women really are from different planets. Plus, the men have the strength advantage. The women have the multi-tasking, puzzle-solving advantage, etc.

Dividing along ethnicity lines only means you have men and women with some physical similarities on a team. Sundra was dead on with her observation that the division didn’t matter. It’s still Survivor.

The first runner-up for this week’s Missing Intelligence Award therefore goes to all the hypocritical protestors. You weren’t there when it was gender or age (or gender AND age), so you shouldn’t be there now.

On to our clips!

Castaways Jump Overboard: First up, we have “Castaways Jump Overboard.” In keeping with past seasons, CBS has put up a clip that is entirely a repeat from the show. Apparently, they don’t read my articles slamming them for not giving good clips like we get for The Amazing Race. I’m miffed.

Immunity Challenge: Oh, and any surprise that the next clip is a repeat too? Yep, it’s the entire immunity challenge. Forgive me if I don’t spend another 10 minutes of my life rewatching this. We do have a new lead-in commercial. It’s a Mazda in the woods. This infinitely improves upon the bear pooing in the woods from the last few seasons, even if “zoom zoom zoom” is a tagline from the depths of Hades. We do have some hotties this season, don’t we? Yul should go shirtless. That sums up my opinions about this repeat of a clip.

Interview with Jonathan: Finally, something new! Jonathan gets interviewed while on Exile Island. He explains he tweaked something in his leg during the challenge. He expresses confusion for being sent here, since the two guys who made the decision weren’t even affected by it. He notes that the men made the decision on that team, not the three women. Trust me, the women noted that too. He justifies stealing the chicken as within the rules, so he’s confused. He then tells us they had THREE chickens, but someone lost the first one upon arrival, and then of course, Flica lost the other two. Sheesh. Idiots.

Jonathan muses on the karma inherent in stealing chickens and losing chickens and Exile Island. Then he babbles about wanting to try raw sea slug (oh yes, totally on my list) and building a fire and how he didn’t get it done because darkness came too quickly. He had to shift camp in the middle of the night, he says, because of winds. Ah, so he’s talking specifically about Exile Island apparently. CBS cuts around so much, it’s quite hard to tell at times.

His other goal is (obviously!) to find the idol. He thinks he has a good idea where it is, but he hasn’t been successful yet. He hopes his teammates miss him. He thinks they do because it’s a small team, and he worked a lot. You’d THINK that would be beneficial, but you know how logical the Survivor lot can be sometimes.

Jonathan likes the twist of the losing team being able to choose who goes to Exile Island. It gives them some satisfaction and helps level the playing field. Jonathan explains the clues and his rationale for making an “A” with his body and a mast, and then digging. So far, it’s not working out too well, this theory.

Interview with Yul: Yul, one of “those who should not wear shirts,” has a five minute interview clip, so I hit pay dirt again with new material. I do a happy dance. He exclaims that he has a whole new meaning for sucks! (So do I, but I don’t talk about it on national TV). Oh, wait, he means that the rain and cold and night sucked miserably. Silly me. He informs us that Cao Boi gives him the most issues, but he does qualify that by telling us he does respect him and what he’s gone through. Good, because in your privileged little Stanford life, some people wouldn’t be able to admit that or even see it. He whines some that Cao Boi either was talking while they were trying to sleep, or Cao Boi was talking in his sleep. Yeah, no matter how spiritual and swell you were, either of those would irritate me, so I’m okay with Yul still.

He touches briefly on Brad’s “hickey” from the headache removal, then launches into a mini-bio. Stanford, law school, lawyer, consultant, Google, consultant, blah blah blah. Heh. Actually, sounds like he’s had a fairly impressive life thus far, career-wise. He says he is blessed in some respects, and is good at puzzles and strategies. He frets that others might find out about his background and decide he’s a threat.

Yul expresses concerns about dividing by ethnic lines, because it might perpetuate stereotypes. Er, not if you DON’T FALL INTO THEM. And even if you do, most of us are intelligent enough to realize it’s because we’re all individuals, and can individually be stupid or smart or a dumb ass, usually all within the same 10 minute period, and still be ethnic and cultural and “represent” and all that blather. Anyway, Yul goes on to say that if the division shows that they’re all individuals despite ethnicity, he’s okay with being part of that.