American Inventor, Episode 1: Everything Is Going to Be All Right?

It’s time for the return of American Inventor, where people – both sane and extremely crazy alike – put forth their new ideas in the hopes they have the million-dollar invention. Our host, Nick Smith, welcomes us to the first episode, where our search begins in Los Angeles and San Francisco.

Before an aspiring inventor can even hope for the million dollars, they need to get past the four-member judging panel. First is George Foreman. At the age of 45, he became the oldest boxer in history to win the heavyweight crown – which he also held over 20 years previously. And then he sold over 100,000,000 (that’s a lot of zeroes!) Lean Mean Grilling Machines, making him a millionaire 100 times over. George tells us he is an American Inventor because he reinvented himself.

This brings up a question I have. Did he actually invent the Lean Mean Grilling Machine? Or did he just get paid to stick his name on it? His statement about reinventing himself sounds almost defensive to me. If he really invented the LMGM, he wouldn’t have to explain how he is an inventor, right?

Sara Blakely is our second judge. She invented Spanx, a line of shape-conscious undergarments that our host says “revolutionized the hosiery industry.” Starting with only $5000 and a dream, she has grown her business into a “worldwide fashion force,” grossing over $150,000,000 last year alone. Sara tells us she has done every step of the American Dream, and she would love for somebody else come to them with a million-dollar idea like she had. Incidentally, it’s not mentioned, but Sara took second place on The Rebel Billionaire, so this is not her first tour on reality TV.

Our third judge is Pat Croce, an entrepreneur, motivational speaker, and best-selling author. He is supposedly best-known as “The King of Philadephia.” Who knew Philadelphia has returned to a monarchy? He went from being the physical trainer of the Philadelphia 76ers to the team owner.

Finally, we have British Mogul Peter Jones, who has built a huge empire spanning real estate, entertainment, telecommunications, etc.

What are the judges looking for? George wants to see passion for the product, marketing ideas, and something with mass appeal. We don’t hear what the others want.

Host Nick says the judges will be seeing inventions in Los Angeles and San Francisco, but then says there will be only one winner from each city. Are they counting L.A. and S.F. as one city? Or will there be two winners from this group? I dunno. Whichever it is, the winner gets $50,000 to improve upon their invention, moving one step closer to the finals.

Our first inventor is Jamshid Hatami, who used to have a high-paying job as an insurance salesman, but gave it up to pursue his inventing dream. He is so excited about his invention that he will tell anybody willing to listen… which is odd because he is hiding his invention under a hoodie and wants to keep it a secret.

We are told Jamshid spent four years and $15,000 on his invention, which is, we finally find out after the judges have to ask him to spell it out for them, some straps attached to a baseball cap and wound around the body. It is supposed to keep your head straight while you’re sleeping – in the car, on an airplane, etc.

Sara can’t help but laugh. Peter calls him “mad.” Jamshid shows us that for women, it has an optional headband instead of a baseball cap, so it doesn’t mess up their hair. Jamshid gets four no votes and is sent packing. He tells us it was a surprise to get four solid no’s – his invention is very simple, but it works.

Up next is Kim Douglas, who presents the “Arf Bag” for “carsick canines.” It’s like a muzzle with a quick-release bag attachment. The dog can get sick in the bag, you take off the bag and throw it out, and then attach a new one.

George is concerned that the Arf Bag doesn’t give dogs enough room to fully open their mouths when they throw up. Peter says she’s “invented something that doesn’t need to be invented.” Another four no votes.

Time for the father-and-son team of Richard Dessert Sr. and Jr. They believe their invention can save lives, as Jr. explains that it is an emergency fire escape suit. If there is a fire in your house, you open up a pizza-sized box and pull out the suit, which is basically a metallized fabric body condom with a small plastic-covered opening for the eyes.

Sara is skeptical that somebody can put this on and then run out of their house. Sr. tries to demonstrate, but can’t get up a very good speed with the suit coming down as far as it does. Peter isn’t sure this is the real answer to fire safety, so he says no. Pat is “not enthralled with the product,” so he says no as well. It’s a no for the suit.

Debbie Solomon is next, and she first conceived her idea 13 years ago, but has never given up on her dream. She tells us everybody can use it. What is it? The Auto Bib – a disposable travel bib for adults and children.

Debbie tells the judges that over 51% of families eat in the car at least once or twice a week. She says her invention is not elaborate, but compares it to other simple devices like Velcro (which is actually much more elaborate than you might think), the paper clip, the plastic straw, and the coffee sleeve.

Demonstrating her invention, she pulls out a bib and unfolds it, placing it on her chest. She then proceeds to spill various sauces on herself and show that the bib stops it all from getting on you.

Peter, a Brit, finds it hard to believe her 51% figure of people who eat in their cars, but the Americans on the judging panel say it’s “without a doubt” true. George says on a Sunday morning when he’s rushing to church in his white shirt, he could really use it. So it’s a yes. Sara likes the name, and it’s a yes from her too. But Peter says the product just doesn’t cut it. Pat says he doesn’t let people eat in his car, but George says he drives a Rolls Royce and he lets people eat in his car. Heh. But Pat continues, wondering aloud if he would invest in this company. The answer is… yes!

We have our first L.A. finalist! For a paper bib. Oooookay.