Age Of Love, Episode 5: Flip-Flops... Not Just for the Beach

Previously, Mark Philippoussis continued his search for his one true love in some rather unconventional methods. First, he had the women compete for a dinner date with him by running a triathlon, where Tessa actually got injured. Then, he had the women play tennis the very next day while still sore from the previous day's events.

Tensions grew as Maria and Mary seemed to face off with one another. We saw Mary cry about the situation... and cry... and cry some more. While some women like Amanda and Jayanna seemed to get closer to Mark, Mary, Jen, and Megan still found it difficult to get some alone time with him.

In the end, Kelli was sent home for what appeared to be no reason at all except that Mark didn't care for her. Tessa was also sent home, for talking more about Amanda on an individual date with Mark than herself. With just six women left, who will be sent home next?

As we embark on a brand new day, Mark is reflecting on the previous day. He's got six women left who he feels attracted to. He knows one of the women in the group could be someone he could really connect with. But, of course, with this only being episode five, I'm sure that he still needs time to think about it some more.

In walks Mateo in what I believe to be his only appearance in this episode. Honestly, I know he's the host, but what purpose is he really serving here? Even on that train-wreck of a show called Cupid years ago, we saw that it actually had someone acting as a host. Then again, what do I know? I'm not a reality show producer.

Back to Mateo, he tells Mark that he will have an opportunity to take the women out to do some of Mark's favorite things. The first date will take place on the beach, where Mark will be taking three women out on a surfing excursion. Mark is definitely excited about the date, saying that surfing is his passion. Funny, I thought tennis was. Then again, this might explain why he hasn't ranked top ten in eight-and-a-half years.

He wastes no time in figuring out which three women will accompany him on the surfing date. He wants Megan to come, simply because she has made it clear to him that she'd like to go to the beach on a date. Maria is also considered, since she has told Mark that she loves the outdoors. Mark's final choice is Mary, because he hasn't spent a lot of time with her, and wants to know her more. If that were the case, then why would you walk away from her while she was still talking that one time at the indoor playground? I hate to revisit history, but I'm just trying to stress the point that it is Mark's own fault that he hasn't gotten to know Mary better.

At the women's apartment (I miss calling it Casa de Cougar), Megan answers the cell phone, where Mark tries speaking in some form of Italian accent. Believe me when I say that it doesn't translate very well with his Aussie accent. After that pointless introduction, Mark tells Megan that he wants her, Mary, and Maria to grab their bathing suits and meet him downstairs. Mark, Megan, Mary, and Maria. Sounds like "Invasion of the M-People," huh?

Naturally, as the three ladies get ready for their date, Amanda is annoyed. As we all know, Amanda is the type of woman who doesn't like the idea of sharing a man with other women. Sure enough, she's upset that she's not going on the beach outing. She then whines that she wants to go. I must say, I wasn't aware that the word “go” could have four syllables, but thanks to Amanda, I now have seen the light.

Mary, Megan, and Maria head downstairs to meet Mark, and they happen to come across a really classic car with wood paneling. Now, I don't claim to be a car expert here, so I can't tell you what kind of a car it is, or what year it was made. I'm hoping that one of you can let me know for sure. Honestly, I'm stumped. It looks like a nice car, though.

This is where the show starts to get kind of... raunchy. I'm sure it wasn't intentional, but it's funny how it was edited in a way that it kind of was. You see, when Mark hops out of the wood-paneled car, he asks the women if they like his woody. At this point, I'm thinking, "What the hell kind of sick question is that to ask to a woman?!"

It then dawns on me that the car is actually the "Woody" in question, and at this point, I'm realizing just how naive I can be. Oops! The girls take this unfortunate name for a car and run with it, and when Mark asks them if they want to ride in his woody, everyone bursts into laughter.

This totally overshadows the lame balls comment made by Mary last episode. Maria just finds it funny that she can now proudly exclaim that she got to ride in Mark's woody! Hah! She also wonders how many times he'll talk about the woody. She does admit she thinks the girls (Megan and Mary) liked it.

Finally, Mark, the women, and "Woody" arrive at the beach. If we weren't exactly sure where they were going, we have Megan singing all about it, and bouncing on the seats in excitement. Soon, we see the group of four grabbing surfboards, and Mary is over the moon with excitement about being on the date. I mean, she talks about how she usually sits at home while everyone else is out on dates. Of course, she'd be excited. She admits she's excited to learn how to surf, but is scared.

With Mark and the women in the water catching some waves, Megan interviews that Mark was really good with them in the water. She seems really grateful that Mark was there to protect them from dying. Yes, dying. Megan even admits she almost died in the water a few times. I'm sure that's an exaggeration on her part.

Or is it? Not long after Megan's interview, we see a montage of the women falling off their boards and hitting the drink. Mark noticed that the women were getting smacked a few times in the head. He particularly notes Megan as having the most trouble with the board, even mentioning her getting a big lump on her head. Of course, Mark gave her props for paddling straight out into the water, since we all know he likes girls who can run a triathlon, play tennis, and go surfing in the time frame of 72 hours. Maria just seems happy that she can stay on the surfboard for one whole second! Don't laugh. Maria could probably beat my time on a surfboard!