Celebrity Apprentice 2, Episode 9: Get a Whiff of This!

As usual, the episode starts with a recap of the previous episode. Here’s my take on last week’s insanity: First up was to complete the task involving the auction of Ivanka’s jewelry. PM Annie Duke’s friends outbid PM Joan Rivers’ friends, and Annie’s charity won a record amount of almost a quarter-million dollars! Presented with reasons to dismiss any of them (Herschel excluded), The Donald opted to fire golfer Natalie Gulbis. Throughout, Joan, fuming over offences both real and imagined, finally erupted in the Boardroom with Annie as the target. It was personal, unprofessional, and she crossed the line more than once.

A second task was executed with focus on the creation of a new frozen dinner. At Athena, Annie never stopped talking while PM Jesse James was reluctant to vocalize his ideas. Over at KOTU, Clint Black pretty much took over the task, but when they lost, PM Herschel Walker (a fund-raising machine) was fired instead.

If you missed that episode or want more details, you can read my recap here. But let’s get going with this week’s adventure.

New action begins with Athena returning to the suite. Everyone there notes Clint ignored Herschel as they left the Boardroom. The players think the teams are about to be switched up once again, but in this game, no one can be sure of anything.

The next scene is Jesse’s presentation of his $20,000 check to a representative of his charity, the Long Beach Education Foundation. Jesse went to California for the presentation and spent a little time at the school itself.

Back in the Big Apple, the teams have been gathered for the next task. Recognizing the teams are uneven, Trump takes corrective action – Jesse must change teams. Melissa feels like she’s the odd girl out on her team now (she was anyway). Jesse isn’t that happy to switch teams and work with Clint again, who he tells us is “the foremost authority on everything.”

After the switch, these are the new team alignments:

KOTU

• Clint Black, country singer
• Joan Rivers, comedienne
• Jesse James, Monster Garage host

Team Athena

• Melissa Rivers, Joan’s daughter
• Annie Duke, poker player
• Brande Roderick, Playmate

The teams are in fact assembled in the NBA Store on Fifth Avenue. Trump says, “I hate people who smell,” and asks Jesse if he uses deodorant. Subtle! It’s a “No.” For Jesse’s sake in the game, I hope this particular irrational “hate” is less than Trump’s hate of repentant DUI offenders. Trump says he uses the stuff, but feels he doesn’t need deodorant. Ew-ww, twice! Let’s move on to the task.

With Trump are a couple of execs from Right Guard. Yup, this one’s about B.O. and deodorant. What’s next, a male enhancement product called “Trump’s Tower?”

This week, the teams must design a four-page print ad to promote a new deodorant, featuring spokesman David Lee of the New York Knicks (pictured at the top of this article). The winning ad will appear at SI.com and in their magazine.

They should have gotten Vince Carter, because, being from Toronto, I can assure you: he stinks. But I digress…

On hand to advise The Donald this week are his daughter Ivanka and financier Jim Cramer, the host of Mad Money. Jim was on this show in Season 7, when he dealt with Gene Simmons’ unique views on selling Kodak products on the street. I praise his ability to become instantly excitable and remain animated for extended periods of time.

PMs must be named now, and Clint and Brande step up for their respective teams. Trump will again pony up $20,000 to the winner’s charity.

The task begins with Athena in their war room. Brande is happy to see they have been given basketball shirts with their names on them.

Melissa is not so happy, though. She feels she makes suggestions, but the others are barely listening. I must say, the first couple of thoughts are no so great. One involves David Lee sweating while playing poker with Annie while Melissa critiques his outfit. The first part may work, but how can a photo depict a fashion critique? Do most of us SI readers even know what “fashion critique” means?

Other Melissa ideas, such as going to the dentist or having David Lee posing naked, would not fly either. Annie tells us those ideas are fine for Redbook, but not a men’s magazine. Melissa feels she’s living “in a cone of silence,” and truthfully, no one is paying any attention to her at all.

Perhaps because meeting Dennis Rodman has somewhat skewed these gals’ view of NBA players, Annie suggests they have David pose naked with a well-placed basketball, saying, “All I need is Right Guard.” They decide that’s too risqué and settle for him shirtless, instead. Phew!

The execs soon arrive at Athena to answer questions from the team. Annie pitches their idea to see if it’s too risqué. They say it’s all right as long as it relates back to the product.

Melissa tries to ask a couple of questions, but Annie cuts her off each time. Melissa now feels Annie is “beyond arrogant” and “a bully with a meanness to her.” You never want to show that to the clients.

Next, it’s KOTU’s turn to discuss the product with the execs. They learn the new orange power stripe is important. They also ask the execs about sex in advertising. Jesse thinks the question is badly asked and rues his return to KOTU.

At Athena, Annie asks Brande what their roles are today. Annie is to be involved with brand messaging, and tomorrow, doing the presentation. Brande and Melissa work on the photo shoot. Melissa tells us she would like to do certain things, but has nothing to do and is frozen out of the task.