The Real World/Road Rules Challenge – The Gauntlet 2, Episode 13: Aneesa Is My Hero

Last week on The Gauntlet 2: Beth sucked. Veterans won. Jeremy got sent home. That was about the gist of it.

Randy and Kina are practicing various Gauntlets in her room. Yikes. Kina says if Randy left she would be sad. Randy says that every mission, he feels like he’s on the chopping block because he’s either up against Alton, or someone is up against Kina. Aww. Whoops, I mean, “yuck!” I don’t know what came over me there.

Julie celebrates the Veterans winning streak of two in a row. Is it really a streak if it’s only two? Wouldn’t that be just a winning line?

Aneesa, Derrick, and Julie sit and discuss their favorite topic- Beth. Aneesa tells us that someone “needs to go into the Gauntlet and kick Beth the f**k out.” Julie tells them that they need to understand that Beth is broke and she needs the money. In the middle of the discussion Aneesa shushes them because lo and behold, Beth walks into their conversation. They try to play dumb, but nobody believes it.

Beth tells us that she finds it funny that Aneesa is saying that they need to knock her out because Aneesa is their weakest player. She’s sort of right. Aneesa hasn’t really gone above and beyond, but she also hasn’t DQed like Beth. Beth goes on saying she hates her team, she hates being disrespected, and she hates being treated like crap.

After the conversation, Julie comes and comforts a crying Beth. Julie says that they’re all scared and they don’t want to go in the Gauntlet. Beth just says that Aneesa is lucky she didn’t bitch slap her.

The teams get to the mission site. The mission is that there is hanging platform with two ladders dangling from it. Each team will have to make pairs, and each pair must climb up the ladder, over the platform and down the other ladder. The platform is very wobbly, and they have a ten-minute time limit. If someone falls in, both have to start over at the starting line. The team who has the shortest overall time wins.

It’s a female Gauntlet day and the winning captain will get a T-Mobile sidekick phone and a free subscription for a year. That’s another good prize! Finally they aren’t giving out crap anymore. Also, the losing captain (Kina or Beth) will have to go in the Gauntlet.

The Rookies are first. Alton and Landon lead. They make it across really well, and Jamie and Jodi are the next to go. Jamie has a near miss, but Jodi keeps steady. After Jamie’s second near miss they complete it. Kina and Jillian are up next. Kina falls. I laugh. They have three minutes, and it looks as if Jillian falls again.

Ibis and Susie go next. Susie makes it up by the platform and yells to Ibis that she is NOT going to the Gauntlet so she should step up and grab that rope. Ibis screams out that it’s too high for her and she can’t reach. They have two and a half minutes and Ibis falls. The ten minutes expire.

Randy and M.J. are the last pair for the Rookies. M.J. falls and Randy jumps in for time’s sake, but apparently jumping in gets you disqualified, so the Rookies have three DQs.

Alton is hopeless. Ibis is hopeful. Kina is seeing the Gauntlet.

The Veterans begin with Mark and David. They struggle a bit, but make it through. Robin and Katie go next. Robin screams for Katie to go and push harder, because she isn’t going anywhere. Her arms get tired and they jump off for the ten minutes.

Beth and Derrick are next. Beth struggles to get up the rope ladder. Her feet are still in the water. She cannot pull her ass up the rope. They reach the ten-minute maximum. Julie and Aneesa are next. Aneesa falls with about four minutes on the clock. They try again, but Aneesa falls again for their second ten minute max. Brad and Timmy are last. Timmy doesn’t seem to be doing well, but they complete the challenge. The Vets celebrate, and I’m confused because it just counts for time now, and we don’t know the totals.

Kina is sad because she knows who she has to send. Being captain is the bane of her existence.

T.J. announces the results. It’s between the four groups that completed it. Mark and David had a time of 2:23. Brad and Timmy had 2:45. The Veterans have a total of 26:08.

For the Rookies, Jodi and Jamie had a score of 2:00. Alton and Landon had 1:37, so the Rookies win with a final time of 33:37.

Kina gets her Sidekick and obtusely large check. The Veterans are shocked. Timmy says that they’re all upset until they realize Beth has to go to the Gauntlet. He says that maybe it’s a victory after all.

Derrick says that he is just thinking who will beat Beth in the Gauntlet. Robin says she votes for Aneesa because if anyone could beat Beth, it would be her.

Aneesa is announced as the challenger and T.J. comes in to spin the wheel. While the wheel is spinning, Aneesa is muttering “Beach Brawl” under her breath. And lo and behold it lands on “Beach Brawl.” To say Aneesa is happy about it would be like saying Roseanne Barr wouldn’t necessarily win American Idol. Julie describes Beth’s face after Aneesa’s outburst as deer-in-the-headlights.

Aneesa talks to Katie and Robin, and there are so many curses, I can’t make out what is what. All I know is Aneesa looks into the camera and says that “Beth better be shaking in her boots because I’m ready to kill that bitch.”

At the Gauntlet, Beth and Aneesa meet in the middle. Then Beth says she isn’t going to compete. She tells us that she isn’t going to put oil all over her body and bitch fight someone because it’s low class. I don’t know what made me laugh harder. The term “bitch fight” or the fact that Beth has standards.

Landon calls out for the captain to represent their team. Aneesa shouts that she will represent her team. Go Aneesa! She tells Beth that she knows she didn’t want to look like a punk on TV, because she would have. All right, Aneesa is my favorite now. T.J. makes Beth get her crap and leave.

David says that their weakest link is going home. Beth tells us that the Vets need to smarten up and get rid of Aneesa because she won’t help them with her cigarettes, asthma, and her mouth. At least she can get up the rope.

Next week: Jodi and Alton make out. The challenge is “The Pit.”

Chris Jakobi is not sure if he can take on as many crazies as there are on this show, but he is willing to try. Fan mail, hate mail or advice can be sent to cjakobi9@yahoo.com.

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