The Apprentice 5 Weekly Performance Review, Episode 5

Bashful Bryce and quiet Charmaine took supporting roles this week and they get NO RATING.

Leslie: Languid Leslie claimed in the boardroom that she offered her expertise, but no one heard her. We never saw this offer – is this more selective editing? Others supported her position, though Lee was most outspoken and his motives are suspect.

Leslie needs to get visual. If no one listens to you, that’s your problem and you will not be successful. Further, Trump has called her out in the boardroom for her lack of “energy.” Her rating is no longer NO RATING, but UNSATISFACTORY. Trump hinted to her that she needs to be PM next week and we’ll see if she steps up.

Lee It’s my opinion that Lee was more interested in playing the game than winning the task this week.

The task was time constrained yet Lee was in no rush to get started. Lee was very supportive of Lenny’s idea, so much so that it didn’t ring true. Further, Lee’s self-imposed role as “Official Team Greeter” to Trump’s assistants did not go unnoticed and I’m surprised Trump is not concerned about such obvious unproductive brown-nosing.

Lee needs to get out from underneath the others’ skirts and shift his focus back to winning the weekly task. For that reason I give him a NEEDS IMPROVEMENT rating.

Lenny When the team first sat down to work, Lenny was especially disinterested in getting off to a fast start, even questioning Dan’s authority in an aside.

Shortly thereafter, Lenny came up with the idea the rest of the team decided to implement, and for that I give him credit. The team (especially Lee) seemed to be in complete support of it. However, any ad incorporating the idea of getting shipwrecked and requiring a sea rescue is not one any cruise line would endorse.

I also question the originality of the concept. I was reminded me of the old AmEx commercial where a bedraggled guy walked out of the sea with only his credit card and into the good life.

Unfortunately, this season people seem to be taking less flak from Trump for not even trying to come up with an idea, as versus trying and falling short. For examples, there are Brent’s bathrobes or Theresa’s horse and buggy ideas. I’m not saying bad ideas should be rewarded; just that “trying” is better than “not trying.”

To his credit Lenny fought for using a voiceover, but Tarek would not hear of it. As that was a key reason for the firing, Lenny’s rating is SATISFACTORY… just. With Trump passing back a warning message for Lenny, it’s time for him to step up and be the PM.

Tarek: I don’t understand why Tarek felt a text reader wasn’t a good idea in their ad, but it was cited as the most important of the two reasons they lost. Coupled with what Trump sees as multiple previous failures on Tarek’s part, I’m a little surprised he wasn’t fired.

Tarek asked, “How often on TV do you watch a commercial only once?” Well, the NCL execs only get to watch it once! And when commercials come on my set, I don’t really watch them. One without sound would not hold my attention.

Before they went to the boardroom, Tarek made the game play error of telling Dan he had no friends in there. Too bad, Dan may have opted to spare Tarek in favor of Lee and Lenny as they were friends. He didn’t do so well once in the boardroom, either. Trump called him “an embarrassment” and implied he didn’t belong in Mensa, and Tarek had no answer.

Tarek’s rating is UNSATISFACTORY. Having repeatedly caught Trump’s eye in the wrong way, I doubt he can survive much longer.

Dan Dan stepped up as PM on a difficult task, and I give him credit for that. He knew there was a very limited timeframe and tried to get right to work. However, he was doing such a creditable Chicken Little impersonation, he confused and alarmed his team to the point that Lee thought he was going to have a heart attack!

Of all the team members, Dan seemed least convinced that Lenny’s idea was a winner. He was steamrolled by the enthusiasm of the others (who seemed willing to endorse any idea that wasn’t their own) and didn’t have time to try and unearth better options.

Dan was accused of trying to do everything himself. Dan did split his team into a second group, with Bryce and Tarek getting the next shot ready, and that was good planning. However, the rest of his team felt they were underutilized. It seems probable that more tasks could have been delegated, with Dan stepping back into a supervisory role.

Dan did a better job than Roxanne as a speaker. However, his “cruising as a life analogy” ramble was not useful.

Dan made a serious game mistake bringing Lee instead of Lenny into the boardroom, for Lenny hatched the concept that Trump hated. Admitting out loud that he didn’t want to be double-teamed by Lee and Lenny was a poor plan as well.

Dan wasn’t very forceful in the boardroom. When Trump browbeat him about not bringing Lenny back, about their poor concept, and about Lee’s role, Dan expressed his differing opinion but did not make any counterpoints.

I give him a rating of VERY UNSATISFACTORY. We’ve seen a lot worse.

Final Comment:

Trump made the right decision. Dan wasn’t the most flagrant offender of Trump’s business rules we’ve ever seen, but he was certainly the one most responsible for this week’s loss.

Brian lives in Toronto, where he can be reached at uncle_bto@rogers.com. He spent a couple of decades working in middle management at The Prudential, primarily hiding behind the coffee machine to avoid his pointy-haired bosses. He’d like to hear your opinions and promises to respond to all serious email! Or, write him if you’d like to know what 100 billion seconds works out to!

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